this few days was rushing final project sketch.
what a great day i have , there's was an accident yesterday .
I'll not make any long sentence to make everyone worry, all i want you all to know I'm back same as last time you saw when i was injury . well in fact the pain is always there.
I'm actually totally random now , just know that i can back to cycling and things just happen like that.Noting at the outside and all i have is the pain at the inside, actually that's nothing already to me since i work so hard , i tried and tried and end up it's the same old story again.
I waited 4 years to recovery and one small incident is back to zero, from the starting leg work out , swimming , short walk and all sort of things and it's just end it here. there are slot for pain for the outside and inside . i just don't get it why every time i try to recover and shit happens?it's not the first time , for the last 2 years the same things happen in life. I rather i did not ask the question at the doctor. Well nothing can change back now , feel the walking pain again. start all the things from zero.
Something that i don't understand,who can define my answer for me?
When someone really know what i'm thinking now.
Maybe i should just stay at home and grow fat , like what people said?
Maybe i should work harder , because it's a process of living?
I just don't know which to choose.
Today i went to have a normal walk around my house area , things are not the same the feeling of the leg is empty and pain.who feel it?
i just saw the msg of his tittle.
feel more random , it's sort of like all the things are coming to me .I don't feel the things you said and i know when you saw me online you will just wipe the tittle off, what's the point of that?just to confest you are correct and i'm wrong? well if you think it that way i have seriously nothing to said about it.I don't want to argue with him because , i don't want him to change me and i don't want to change anyone thought , it because i learn that when i stand at someone position i will see something that we will not usually see. When i know how to stand on people position see things i keep quite and understand before i get into conclusion. I also learn something if i want encounter i'll make sure that i will have a specific reason to give. Mengz were right we miscommunication to each others , he get the wrong answer in his head , and i get my back off charge.
last year somebody pass away which bring down my personal emotion, well when i get rid of it , things is just coming and coming. He said before" When a person went to the lowest point , they will jerk up to the very high point " so is the statement with me?
went back home today and have a talk with my father , he said to me not to go for cycling too long it might hurts , well that's very good support from him at the 1st time as i can said , he ask me today when i back home for dinner , he said why you walk like zombie , i actually don't dare to let him know and my mum knows that my leg is in medication so she just split out and said it out to my father, and i get cheerful words even bring out the oil for me to use on my leg, he said maybe you work to hard on your leg , actually there's was a small accident that i did not cover.
i started to keep things inside , i don't know who i can splits to .
All i want is somebody that understand me and let me talk before scold me, i don't like when people don't know anythings and they came to me or my friends to said things about me , well sometimes you see i walk normal and sometime i'll not , i have no need to tell a lie because some people they saw the incident.I don't care how you look at me at this moment all i wish is you ask me what's going on and it's better then you make your own answer.
Apologize
is words to said sorry , it's doesn't mean i'm wrong either the person are wrong also, it's a words that how i rate my relationship and the level of respect to people. that i respect so i apologize. it's just how i rate my relationship.
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