Lynda Lovett

There are sometimes at this moment somebody would call you and wake you up and said something that you will not usually will listen , to be true this is the time that you can have a lots of words on your head . it's good to share to each of other at this time , but many of the people were sleeping and you can hear the silent and feel the wind blow at you the feeling is just nice while you were talking on the phone and chatting with a soft voice , as the wind blow and blow you feel the cold around you the feeling it's just nice . suddenly there is a voice starting to sing a song ... and you started to get bored and frustrated and you look at the time .... it's 5.45, time to go to bed you hang off the phone and wondering around. there goes my midnight....how about yours?sleeping comfort with the pillow and opening the mouth as big as the moon? enjoy.
to who that call at this times thanks for telling me something that i did not realize , yet it's good that you let me know about it.

where ever said that your are crazy , yes you are .
Why would you care what people said about you? you are who you are.
I did not notice that i have bloged 3 years , so i would be surprise to know that also.

You need to be chill to do something cool ,if you were hot you will do somethings hash.

I'm listing this song over and over again that is Lynda Lovett- close to you.
Well i'm not trying to be famous on Google search engine but i do feel bad , why because i did not really saw Lynda lovett in comment, the only things i saw is her website and her website it's doesn't look like a singer web page i had no idea on that Not even her lyric i can find online  , i've listen to this song because of i'm looking for relaxing music and i did not notice that her song are actually at my hard drive  so i found her, at first i look at the tittle of the sound track i though it's carpenter version of close to you and i found out it's not what i think, and for the 1st time i play finish the songs i stop and i went out for a drink as i was drinking my tea at the cafe , i had the rhythm of the song keep play in my head, and i went back home and play again  and again it's been 2 weeks i'm playing her songs it's the same song i thought i'm a bit over but it's just nice , this kinda of songs it's more to personal like it , some people would not enjoy listening , different people had different taste.

there are few words that keep in my mind again and again.basically it's all !!!

let me be close to you, share you dreams with me , tell me your feel , what bring you feel tonight
let me be close to you , please don't turn aways , in the lonely night , i'll stay.
take my hand we will found our way hand in hand love will never fade together ..................

Is all about the ....

That day i went in to a conversation and i found out something.

It's happy what you have with this relationship,
don't put a fake smile and said yes,
think 1st 
before you answer, 
Are you suffering from this relationship,
Where do you see 10 years later if you in this relationship?
if you answer yourself as lucky as like no body , please go read novel.

well the conversation start when i went to  my friends birthdays party.
there were bunch of rich and middle class people there as i can said that it's a new things to learn in here , the lady started to said something about relationship ...

She said that she though finding a rich husband is what she want but after those question , she said a lots of thing.Which i totally agree what she said about it , it's matter of life who don't want to be happy as it seem , but happiness do come from money people that said no , she said don't wasted time on that , they don't know what it means . well in this fact i know what she mean by that , she said she suffer at this relationship even do she has money to shopping and a beautiful car but she said she's not happy what she have now, she also said that if we suffer in relationship we should just let go , or not bring to marriage because it too late to turn back and 10 years is not a easy way to pass through ,  if 2 years you are wearing a fake mask , keep going  until you found what you really want, that is the things you want.No matter what your husband do , don't ask she said , no matter how much money he just don't ask , no matter what he do at outside don't angry.Well there are few lady were agree about this , i was like "erm now i know why the rich people do find mistress"just a short dreaming but does it apply to all? no comment just listen and listen more and more interesting.Even do the rich uncle would probably agree this  , the table get crowded and many more are joining in talk and share .... lots of them were probably are the same things like that.

The other case is a rich girl having boyfriends , she does give him money to use and car , but you know what she said? she said he will never dumped me (so confident to said that). many of them ask why , you know what she said the worlds are very straight forwards , she said that i have a phone  a very new model phone and my old phone i kept in drawer , so my boyfriends said that he can help me sell off ,she don't mind about that but few month and week later the phone still remain and can't sell off , she said if he would sell it at 50% of the market value i'm sure that the phone is consider sold, so she said something like this , from this point i've know he's love my .... more then me , it start in a small things when things getting bigger and bigger ,she said the boyfriends said that his phone was spoil and she gave green light for him to use her old phone.
she just said something like that.

i was surprise to hear that a lots of things , you can know what's is going on here
just a few simple things , lucky there all come in single or not hahaha who knows what happen later....

thanks for the invite to the party I've learn much and hear much.
Quite busy .....

Things might change my life.

stupid is sleeping !!! hahaha

stupid let me shot portraits 

this things can make you drunk , don't ask i also don't know what's this X D

i don't know what had happen just now ,
i don't know what am i doing so and so far.

went for few can of beer and still not feeling what am i lack of.
today afternoon i though i send the sms to my pet brother but i did not, so i though i were be ignore so i keep it to myself , i don't know what's up now i just don't know , maybe i'm still waiting for the answer ... does the sky that high? does the sea so deep?

it's look like life come to an end , i don't want to know what i'm gona pay for the price for dreaming . things just kept inside where do i share where do i scream ,
i just don't know where am i standing .

THE DAY THAT I STOP MSG HER...
the day that i notice i'm being ignore , i were msg her for few days and one fine day i send her a msg she did not reply me so i guess she was busy , so next day i send another msg same things happen , i did not get reply.

so i guess things would not go anymore further , i think.
so i stop sending msg to her .
maybe it's my fault for no begin serious , you might think of that , i don't know what's your precipitation , but i know my limitations , it's hard to let people know that you are busy when people did not see what you doing , and yet started to compare with others , maybe compare is a right choice , i'm fine with that because so how i'm facing that also. but it's gone now.how can i blame you , you are not the wrong one , hope that see you and you happiness grow.Find a better me.

sorry if i made you wait, sorry for make you think that i'm not serious , sorry for things i did not go for it, sorry to you.Do you still MM ?

when all the things crush together bad things always happen.

Pass month what my pc had upgrade and install...

New stuff add on i should be happy right?

Just a night shot of my pc when it's hot.

laptops are always around me....

i started to hate what i'm doing here X D

another 1tb hdd arrival ... thanks a lot !!!! 

i met a strange men

No ones know why i drop my tears that night , none of them know what happen , things just so unpredictable... all i have to said it's just a flash back ,i been holidays for a month maybe longer , does this matter ?

No matter how far i go how much i do it just won't stop ,
they said i'm emo yeah maybe they are right but do they even know what you think?
NO they just don't feeling up the chat just to talk about you ,when you realize that they are spade.

I met up somebody , and i have lots of thoughts Uncle peter friends daughter were pregnant, i was not surprise to hear that but what surprise me is the boyfriend , he's married man and his wife met an accident and dead, listen well and guess how old could this Boyfriend be, you and i were blinking and eye his age can be your father more then enough , a 48 years old man married with a 20 year old girl ,after hearing that i feel that i have few uncle and friends are like that ... this still not surprise me..the final things , they don't even know each other more then a year ,well at first i though she was MBA... but in fact i'm wrong , she have the baby after a year later,and i ask huh what did miss , i though you said she was pregnant , yes they said , and you know what. that man join us after that , i was shock to see him and happy to learn something from him ,i still haven ask why she is pregnant , well let me tell you the secret , this man is a business investor he plan to have a small coffee shop and maybe a restaurants..and the girl were one of the top student in the college , he said i marry her because she said something that i hear on a cafe , she said i might not the best student in the college but i do believe that what i do my best now is good for my future, and people just want to get a pass for their result they just has no dreams.

I was thinking was that simple that inspire you to make a move to admire her?
he said i been checking her for years about 1 year ago , till i met her and start to approach her , and now is 2 years .
wow shocking news but it's only one year? are you that confident?
he said to us life is all about risk, you try to put a thing in there and you will get 2 or you get none , well in fact i catch what he said at this point.he also said that many people said that buying a house is earning but from what he see it's just another backpack fill with rock.he said a lots of things like this , and he ask me
son do you know what i mean ? i said the 1st 1 you are talking about a women , the second 1 you are trying to said that people don't see what they see , he give a smile at me and tell me son you are quite easy to catch up what do i mean , well he just keep on said and said , it's interesting dude i'm looking for so hard to have this kind of people , they speak what they want and i'm the one to digest the story and facts.

chat and chat till he said until his business , he said dude since we are quite the same mind i would offer you some deal will you be my guest? i ask again what's a deal when it come to deal?so do you want a deal? he ask again i said yes i hope i have extra coins for that , he laugh at me and said you no need to have a sen for this business ,i was thinking and thinking what will it be.... i ask again what business came from zero investment ? he said son i have , all you need to is promise me, again i said i don't make empty promise he whisper to me , after listening that
i've just bring my hand out , you got a good deal.Most of my friends know what i'm doing for the last few weeks.

thanks you for the deal .
i'm just lucky to know you,hope i get more good deal in future.
i sms him.

he reply with
ha ha no worry son , there is still lots of empty space for you.
all you need is to ask.

after talking to him i found out that i did not figure out why his wife pregnant and why one year later ....
he's a smart one.

it's been so long his death ,i'm still thinking about what i do from the pass , it seem like another one is coming to me.
________________________________________________________________

when we start to cry we started to appreciate
when things gone you only started to think
when there is no support we only started to look for it
when we have what we want we started to slow down.

Uncle ben ask me before :
what do you want in life?
what do you appreciate?
what will make you cry?
what gone but you can fight back?
what you get now is what you want?

i can't answer that @@ do you believe?
it's not that easy , you can't have a specify answer...

What a bad luck day ...

What a day ... it's a bad luck day or just something i din plan?
wanted to sleep early but failed ,
wanted to go to post office but pos express down ,
wanted to help Bernard clean his virus but forget he use intel, and my machine is amd.
wanted to sync my phone but there is no cable around
wanted to open pc to surf net but mobo lan card dies.
....

Dell pc is not working fine again what wrong?
thinking of pressing D power and fn power.... yet so much things i've notice that,went to peter there wanted to help him to do recovery but you know what i see 2 damn deleted screenshot, it's has been deleted few weeks ago , peter laptop were having problem so help him recovery his laptop... that 2 screenshot just jump lay on the destop , then i press it see it's file that peter needs ,i discovery that peter were playing friends for sale at that time i think, i was busy doing my stuff , just feel so sad and felt sorry to peter, peter know he's my pet brother so he bought him , and well peter told me that he change his name into sam pet brother , but the other buyer buy back and something like cursing words,ok after looking at those snapshots , maybe peter do it purposely , or maybe not because the file is already deleted i get back the file from recycle bin , so before i ask him clearly i ask peter why do you took those snapshots? he said he wanted to show me but he thinks that that is no big deal , maybe the buyer don't know how to play or what, so he said i've just delete after thinking and he also said sumore that time you rushing your work , you have your own work problem to solve. that why he did not told me , and why did he called me to help him to recovery his lost file because 2 month ago he accidentally deleted some important file that he needs i'm there and i'm sure that is not made by purposely . this is what he told me after i help him recovery his files and when i went home, stupid mobo lan dies thinking want to send over for warranty or use the external lan 1st.

if you can't manage to play a game , then don't put yourself in.
if you can't stand to lose something , and don't want to find ways to earn back then don't start cursing , you just a loser.
if only you follow and play the game wisely, things will be in your way.
if you don't even respect a friends friends , it means you only do something to express for you friends to accept you.
if you would like to curse people , think before you do.
if you started it 1st , don't tell somebody and started to cry like a baby.
if you can't even accept things like that , don't put yourself on track , you can be who you are , you have rights to choose.
if you did not know how to said sorry , don't ask another person to help you.
if you would do that , who you think you are?
if only you know who are you.

You would said it was a joke ,you can't play with a joke and you started to laugh?
You would said don't worry , they still small don't know what is joke.
You would have to try to tell jokes on stranger then you would know it's feel like a joke.
You would help one side because it's already something to you.
You would just help it said a sorry.
You would try to make it happy because it's something to you.
you would said people don't understand it but do you understand it?
You would have the best time now.
You would even give what you have,do it do that for you?
You would listen what it said.

I'm not to bring out argument out here, but you should know what you should have said and what you should not said, i can sleep one night and forget something.
one sentence would made people feel fed up .
don't ask me why i wrote this ,
ask yourself why do you read this?
and why do you blog also.

Uncle tan CL birthday.

it was like 1x+ year I were celebrating with uncle tan birthday, every year i will be there , and he's my father friend.No idea just go this is the 1st time i list down of him because of what he said. sometimes things are funny around , even do he's rich , he still is a kind people as far as i can see , he start his footsteps same as my father , and my father choose not to be so rich he said. it's like open " and close " what just happen? ya i have no idea don't ask X D,i can't change people mind but i can change people thinking.

well well we went to SENRI restaurant i think , whole Panmart were there, we reach there around 8 , and my dad ask me to come back on 6 , sad things happen... was asked my mum to fetch me at the afternoon about 3 i told her to confirm i have to call her, but in fact 3 in the afternoon no one pick up ... and damn i know she's out with auntie shella Y.Y i haven sleep for about 26 hours was doing the 3D modeling ... keep doing until 3 something i stop and i could not go home to sleep , was plan to go home at 3 and had a fast sleep about 3 to 4 hours ... end up ..
my mum called me at almost 5 oc... i'm serious angry and tired, angry has no longer apply after she fetch me , i went home take a bath and went out for an hour, then came home ... chating uploading watch movie until 7 something dad just finish then only went to Uncle tan birthday.

Senri restaurant i think the food is kinda good , the environment is nice too,something inspire me about their interior all about water driping around , but the choice of the preparation is kinda bad , imagine a buffer that only have 5 tempayaki stick for each time , and 10 Japanese rolls at a time , it's just a scam .. i was thinking how would they serve people like this , there are like 50+ guest there , i was thinking is the restaurant 1st time organize a buffer or they din really care what people would said.
all i can said is what we paid is not what we want to get,even do the tempura prawn was like 10 pieces at a time ... for almost an hours the food serving is kinda like slow and people were walking around ... and for me , i was like food food Y.Y where are the food ? there is no food i want food !!! so sad went to the desert conner you think what they serve us? ice cream this and that lots more? ya your imagination were can think more then they prepare...well they give 6 box of ice cream with half of the box is eaten before prepare...this is hard to accept and there is a ABC conner which is only have 10 kinds of mixture well this can be accept.

I think Uncle Tan would not mind about this, because he seem to have fun, maybe uncle peter told me that some people would make the worst things to be the better things in life, so i think Uncle Tan has just apply to it, and for the birthday song singing i feel kinda cold and sad about it i wanted to sing louder to make environment feel joy but sadly i don't want to be a rose in the glass , i don't meant to show off that i respect him , well in fact how much you give is how much you get , the bigger claps you give the louder claps you receive i do believe that i give almost everyone a louder claps.

i saw fake face neh never mind they are always around us , as life goes bare with it or you can't stand it then just act with it .

but i found something cute haha her daughter , she plan his father a cup cake present from Sydney to Malaysia cool... kinda nice about the cupcake .. but but the worst part about the CAKE !! ya even do i don't like eating cake but simple things that the restaurant did not do WHERE ARE THE PLATES , KNIFE?WOW shocking....the don't bother to ask also .... good service and people paid to notice that , i thought Japanese have the best respect to people but for what i see it's all about money only.

All i can said happy 55th birthday Uncle Tan X D.
best wish for you.
July 22 = X
I've just know that date after 1X+ years of celebration with him hahaha
i have a good sleep after more then 30 hours....
``````

Don't promise me ever

Please don't promises me forever
i want us to love each other one day at a time....
...and string all those days together like the precious things they are..
...instead of trying too hard and promising too much.

Please don't expect me
to always be good and kind and loving.
There are times when i will be cold
and thoughtless
and hard to understand.

But it will only be because of the weather
or the flu
or one of my moods...
...not because i love you less.
Please remember that.

Please don't think about all the things
that could happen to us.
don't think about other people
coming between us.
Don't think about outgrowing
each other or growing out of love.

Please do think about all the good things
that could happen to us.
Think of growing closer to each other,
finding new reasons for being together...

...and think of loving .
i will, too.
I'm right now.

Please don't get mad at me
if i forget your birthday
or some special day we share...

And please remember
that there is an "everydayness"
about what we have that is beyond birthdays
and anniversaries.

That's why, sometimes,
I may not rememeber one special day...
because all our days are special to me.

Please don't ever sign a letter "as ever"
Please don't be too easy on me ...
or expect me to be too easy on you.

Both of us have room to grow,
and both of us have to grow
if we want to hold each other's love.

Please don't ever give me
too much of yourself
or take too much of me .
In our togrtherness
we still need our private places.

Please listen to me
when i'm talking to you...
and please
don't every think about someone else
when I KISS YOU.

Please don't start an argument
or make me look foolis
in front of other people...

..but when we're alone
don't feel like you're walking on eggs.
Go ahead and say what you think.
If o need telling off.
tell me off.

Then we can have our fight
and make up
and love again
just us.

Please remember
to call me sometimes
for no reason
except that you feel me thinking
about you,
needing your voice.

Please don't ever lose that laught of yours
it's such a real laugh

And never change the way
you brush my hair back from my eyes
and smile or pull my ear
when i'm trying to be very serious...
or the little odd ways you have
of saying things that make you "you".
one of a kind
the one i love.

Please
let's not use politeness
and busyness and silence
to avoid our provlems
and they places where we hurt.
If something is wrong
let's go after it and make it right.

It's a good feeling
to thinking of growing older with you,
but , please,
let's not ever grow old.

I want us to always hang on to the newness
that we have right now/
And let's never be ashamed
of our innocence,
of the child within us.
let's never give up our dreams.

Please don't try to keep it from me
when you're feeling down.
I'll never be able to share your joy\
if you try to protect me
from your sadness.

Please
Don't ever say never...
and please don't promise me forever.
all i ask is that you love me
now.

And please know
that i love you more
today
than i ever have before.
I can't promise you forever,
but i can promise you today
with the hope and belief
that there is a beautiful tomorrow
in store for us.



Via:rotatingcorpse

Aren't they asking for sorry?

People dripping tear when come to relationship , why because most of us scare of losing it . that is simple , some people plan a relationship a head , might find dirty way to approach the one they love, when time come it all dependence of time.There are some people that don't cry so easy before getting together and yet after a relationship is on things started to goes wrong,when is relationship is on we are blind even do many things we did not notice such as love once start to change their attitude like , when 1st met they would said no for every things, but when times comes they will just said i want a thing, and things started to change here but most of the people did not notice because some people thinking that is getting close , well in fact somebody were just thinking that it's something stupid or maybe a jealousy ,wipe it and save it.there are people always written and have crying called such as they feel something sad about a game or maybe a joke ... and they will tell the love one they cry for a night for that , i have saw something that is kinda stupid and funny if you really really want to know what all about relationship why not spy on a day you might found a lots of things you would not know about, if that relationship is a planner.relationship is build trust , and get to know each other more and more, some people would go for a boring week, repeatedly and they still feel happy , don't you think every week doing the same things are bored ? oh well in fact life is just like that... that is normal if we keep repeat why we do.
it's bored , don't tell me that the world Stupid here because people may just fall a sleep when come to relationship. how good is good how well is well ? i just can't stand people that love to write sad note on a note pad , phone msg or a blog , and it written said that " you don't know how i feel and i hope you don't see this I'm trying to trow away the note" geesh you found it .what the meaning of this ? i had no idea are you trying to ask for sorry?


It's all about sorry...
sorry when time come i hurt anyone of my friends , i might be too late to said sorry but at least you feel something here , sorry that i treat people so cold , sorry that i being a person that straight forward , sorry all the things i might not to said but i did , sorry i build hope but i did not appreciate , if you had a time droping by here i'm glad you are someone that i really need to said a sorry for you . I wanted to go ahead but i have something blocking people might said it was just a fake reason , else i'm not asking people to believe what i had , i know it's just too late to said sorry and yet all i can do is just jog down here.I'm just to said sorry for the people i chase for , friends that i screw up , things i had promises , sorry if i can't really do it , i will still going for what i'm doing but you might feel me cold, sorry is what i want to said i hope you my reader who saw this , i'm just happy if you just read it . sorry.I'm appreciate every moment i had. thank you.

i did not give up , i just don't know how to approach ....

How to understand Samcrictim language

How to understand Samcrictim language
there is few easy words like
BiBo BiBo = it means yes , report in ,accept, sender
BoBi BiBo = it means no , report out , not acceptable , reciever
dido dido = it means Oh yeah , feel like sleeping , use to express sleeping but can't.
dodi dodi = it means oh no , feel like not sleeping , use to express that you are going .

what the different with Bibo Bibo with dido dido?
the different is one is to express and one is to communicate , Bibo Bibo is use to communicate , and dido dido is to express.

examples:
Bibo Bibo - bibo bibo i get the message.
bobi bobi - bobi bobi he's not here !!!
dido dido - damn I'm dido dido now ....damn tired.
dodi dodi - well in fact I've just go to dodi dodi at my room now ...

to whom that feel this.

When people walk away , maybe something is happening infacts there is something that we should not ask , else we can only walk forward and leave people behind put ourself into places and not looking back for memories, so just don't give concern to people that stop, they may slow you down.

so please don't slow down for a person that don't want to help itself we have to walk away and be curel to them because the more you care the more they made mistake, they can catch up with us if they really want.

so sorry i beign so selfish and curel you have to make yourself clear and understand it.


We hunt for food because we are hungry , we do so much and hard work just to push to limits , we work so hard it's just because of money yet not dream , it's all about life till the end we were people that sleeping inside the coffin, where does we really go?We had just no idea where we go, it's so stupid.we just lost!!!!

things that i don't know how to said.....

sometimes i don't know how to said maybe i have to use to it ...
have to learn to walk at this time , i'm free to go i'll never going to look back , all i have is just forget it , you have thought me much thanks alots .
what a news you have, at least you go will the happy way,moment that i play joke with you , talk to you , what you said what you thought ... it just end it here,what else i can ask for , the love you gave me is more then a real father can give maybe,you left with a smile , things that you said in the room that day was my last to see you forwardly how could this happend ? i can start to learn stay alone , maybe i remember i cry on the time when i have a selection you hug me and tell me sometimes things will regret after you choose ,so what are you doing now or later don't worry and don't regret and work it hard , i work very hard i also did what i can sorry you can't see what i'm having now , but i'm not sure can i really stay alone i have no idea, you guide me thought the way this few years althought i did not really know you quite long maybe 4 years is a good realationship,i've remember that time i cry you hug at me it's so warm, i remember i remember i remember .
you said glad that i'm here with you that day , why don't you just tell me that you are not felling weird or what ? maybe i can predict it or what ... a sudden leaving i can't accept it . althought i'm smiling but people do not know my feeling . it's so cold now , tear are droping , things went so wrong . i should have told you more things or maybe i should tell you more jokes that day , i 'm leaving you a empty msg and it's just a few hours chat... i hope i stay longer so i can tell you more things but i can't make it sorry i'm sorry , i thought you want to rest but you were thinking something else , I SHOULD not leave so early i should stay , i should !your giving are more then i can imagine,sorry i'm very sorry i can't change things here but i felt so bad you know.You threat me so well as a son but i can't mange to hold you till the end ,It's not faith , it's my mistake it always my mistake ... there is no one else then here.i can't things now , i'm breaking down... you said "sam move on you did well , proplem that you have is not the problem , that problem you can slove easy". after reciving something after his incident i know what happend and why he lefted something for me and it's something that i've slove the problem , you not even my father but why would you do that , i have no idea , sorry crying at now are pointsless ,the relationship of us is not about that , is the meaning and the facts that we share it's a joyful share , why just why .... sorry i work very hard for what you said and i do and do , i'll never leave you a empty answer for that.things that you gave i don't know how to give back or return , thanks you for all of this years and words. You are a person of the picture gone with ....what you told me that day on the room i'll do i will .

it's worth to read when it's real

finals for 3D modeling the lighting is kinda bad and the texture is kinda week X D no comment get a B+ for the subject X D ..... everythings goes fine .




kah heng 21st birthday X D.

Picture i edited with wallpaper X D

Look at zikang @@ no comment weh ....

Model shooting X D

If You Can..

If you can start the day without caffeine;
If you can get going without pep pills;
If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains;
If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles;
If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it;
If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time;
If you can forgive a friend's lack of consideration;
If you can overlook it when those you love take it out on you when,
  through no fault of your own, something goes wrong;
If you can take criticism and blame without resentment;
If you can ignore a friend's limited education and never correct him;
If you can resist treating a rich friend better than a poor friend;
If you can face the world without lies and deceit;
If you can conquer tension without medical help;
If you can relax without liquor;
If you can sleep without the aid of drugs;
If you can honestly say that deep in your heart you have no prejudice
  against creed or color, religion or politics; then, my friend, you are

  almost as good as your dog.

www.jimgeary.com/faves/IFYOUCAN.HTM

People in the picture "No more"
Have you every saw a picture with tears?
Gone it's all gone , just one night everything gone ....
who's knows about the feeling? who?
No one else does , who cares about it ?
it's just gone ... people in the picture just gone.
things won't go back , and time won't change 
making a anti clock vise clock did not change anything .
it's just change the thinking of human , we are still cheating ourself
just one night it's gone left with the picture .
YOU MAY REST IN PEACE.

People around me the think what they do they din make up thier mind and reply with heart , as given the door is open but the invites stop there , when the door close the invites wanted to go in and want to said something. I could not understand why and what happend , you msg me at the time i reply and just make things invisible? well i'm on my own i guess , if you think that is fun or else ... that could let it be , what are you thinking and what are you doing is a matter of facts ... The door will not always open and the door may close very long for certain reason. i'm middle of busy of something that people would think that i would know something or maybe people will qoutes something on thier private message there and i would know what's going on... well i can tell you one things if what you think is true , i can't change the fact it's already a point of view of yours. what matter now?it's has a funny attitude , no reason to know why because the answer is pop up since early.

There was a situation like this a person who don't know what is correct and what is wrong , he/she is asking for answer by the side of thier own , proudly the answer will have more advantage to the asking side , it's what is answer made of? asking people around and yet people said yes you are correct and he is wrong , you no need worry what he/she said? is this what usally answer the asking side? more or less people would support you just because they don't you to get mad and always go with the same answer that what you having ,no matter how wrong you are they still price you , support you . is this what you want? well lots of people can do that ... avoiding argument but this only kills did not helps , you can think of thousand of reason to make a right person wrong , you also can made of millions of wrong to the person is right. it's all depance on what you see or we can said our heart.

When things started , most of the things are beautiful , people can forget about all of the things, sleeping dreaming each other , when things go abit long and long things started to change 
it's start with simple , and it's getting complicated , why so , let's said  a couple did not have any argument before or maybe talk louder to each other , when things is out of limited one of then can't stand it or maybe it's hold in the heart too long things like this may blow out some situation, when this kinda of situation had it people who's angry will start to blame the weather , family all sort of things . but this only the starting , it's has the 1st time it's will happend then 2nd time but when till the day that he/she can't take it anymore yet things blow out again just like that. That means it's has certain reason to hold the breath so long just to explode one in a wild. make it this way people may though i'm into something , but what sort of things do i get into? trouble? it's that what i want ? or is that what you want? Don't ask for the reason , think carefuly is that really what happend?I'm not god also not an angle what i wrote and what i see is the fact of future use some of my friends believe it what i said and what i read , some said rubbish what sort of rubbish is writing here? i can't even understand, you know why would you said that ? before reading this you heart is already anti about it , so going and going you are just reading my bull shit, yet you think it's a rubbish . matter or facts does it has same situation that you having now or maybe it already happend ?

Thanks you for reading this ,well if you want to send me a message that doens't reply well you already got me , you love your prank right you share to somebody else, so it's fun , it's happy to you do you feel you are the winner ? oh gosh you are just a GOD. You are smart to know things like this but you never know a person feeling , you just worry about pride , right and wrong.

People do judge people at first sign , after a small argument then following days will be more and more diffrent , can prosit to stranger level ... like i don't know you . so this is what people thinking and doing . Life of choice , winner takes all you know why? winner just take all, all of his/her answer, that made them a winner. So are you a winner now? 

it may harm for the strong words , but why people will said that , it's too free nothing to do come to critic and flame? if that a fact then make it your answer , you are always a winner.

Pass week ....

Section with David X D


OurModel X D

see uncle  doing what behind there cross hand wor hahaha X D

chasing cars i'm in the car downhill with them .....

UFO!!!! sport car interio nice ? X D

Top hill of the gasoline and lookout point ....

Our big brother ... Tv8 Hair stylist for I want to become a model  X D he's well known on magazine ...MR. JARRYL EE



i'm on my holidays for a few weeks... it seem nothing happend X D...
but moment between the holidays it happend alots of things,good and bad , sad and happy ... lots of lots of thing just happend.

2weeks ago Uncle admited to hospital , was so worry about it the moment i get the phone called, my hand was shacking i've no idea ... what just happend , Uncle fainted on the ground at 2 at the morning , he woke up for some drinks and fainted few steps after reaching the ground floor, lucky there nothing happend to him .So worry @@ i get the phone called by Uncle chew at lunch time , looking for Uncle for lunch he asked me few days ago ,end up i went to hospital and had lunch with him there,the day before the incident my dad went to some dealer to get the fruits , he bought big orange , mango , apple,grape , so many box !!! until the chiller can't slot anymore , dad was planed to bring up to penang to gave ivan mun and father also sister, but it's too much !!! i ate almost few days fruits breakfast lunch and dinner, i bring some to Uncle , he seem to be happy at the bed , had some chat with him , he asked sam do i over work or do i always works too stress? i was trying to avoid that question... i know the answer but i'm not amature to answer that question yet , because i also over works sometimes but to me stress is like totally nothing , i can't feel it but some how i can see how people act when they are stress , So i answer him Uncle actually nowadays the weather is quite hot it's not how you work ,last time you also work like this now also the same what change you?weather?Uncle smile on me and said i've think proply i serious work too hard , i need to rest , you no need to take me for a garden walk. @@ ok well he knows something.talk and talk till i quite late friend of mine called me up ,asked me for food season so i said ok, then we meet up at my house , they bring me to subway 1st then went to A&W for deserts .... wow what a days....

for the few days and stright for food season i'm scare .... well we do explore alot but money costing also quite alot @@, we been to thaipan for red bean soup , bubble tea at sunway , went up to gasonline moutaint , look out point , subway , wendys , almost all @@ then also went to kl for beef noodle middle of the night , then went to pudu for poridge also the jelly fish,Taman sea big frieds , PJ 9 frieds banana , ice cream section ,kfc ,mcdonlads sundae.. more more, Tenji at Mont Kiara wao until i fat now hahaha ...

lots of friends was asking me where did i have so much money to eat X D.. after going pray season with mengz we both get a lucky lottery that win us money more , good things is after i get the 1st stricked i get anoter lucky 1st price @@ wow ...
not bad weh this comming holidays got extra pocket money ... wanted to get a new phone but not at the moment la . everythings get smoothly after the praying section , before i was trying to go to praying season i hear what uncle said , he said , said jor must do , do jor must understand.After listen to that i quckly called to mengz and ask him rather he want to go for praying anot lucky the buzy asshole is free else there is no pocketmoney X D.

after upgraded my pc few fans i'm quite happy with the temp it's quite low and nice,
There is one hell week , 10 pc to fix and format @@ killing man ... sumore dennis called up he also join the fun ... ask me to format his pc and check any problem too bad his ram is dead , so have to wait spare parts.It's a busy week @@ i tried to rush all pc in 3days because there is a beach party , before i go i have to format all then only i can have fun trip.

@@ beach party , there have 2 groups of people asked me @@ but lucky one of the group did not called at the last minute thanks god, so i went for a day trip at PD we had an afternoon BBQ party there ... some of the guys they quite smart and infomative @@ how on earth they get fresh and nice fish and seafood @@ ... no idea weh just suprize .... we went back at 7 oc tired and happy everyone went back to pj and had a beer season , then all went home early about 12 we all said bye bye good good this kinds of events and organize guys are quite nice and relaxing , actually i'm the youngest there , all also macam uncle liow geh ... siong chey ... haha i know them by uncle actually , uncle told me that he's out off the range and could not catch up anymore on that , i believe that so he just intro to me and ask me if i have change bring some picture back , well picture i did not bring any back Y.Y sadly,but i did told him after he get out from hospital.

Old man was too happy and i've a mission that is take care and chill down Uncle , try let him relax and don't him stress out , well some stupid old joke would helps , laughting will helps too.... X D

By the way i've been running with Uncle at TTDI for like weeks , he can run everydays i can't do that at the 1st day @@ not even 5 km, but the secound day getting better because my leg is in pain so when i can't stop if i stop the pain will get more because the muscle is tired ... reach the 3rd day my leg totally can't run but can walk , i did not go on the 3rd day after the 5th days i follow again well i can feel the power of joging, well finish 5km for 1 round . then the next week uncle bring me to kelana jaya park there for running he asked me 10 round lets us set 10 round for this week total it up it like 70 for a week ... so i promissed him and he said bring me to food season but without sugar , a week a head is my body check time , actually i quite scare about the report 1 you know .. but uncle forced me to run just because he know somethings that i don't know ...until the days my repots is out then i know what the reason of running ... the pain of my legs is still there but i'm trying hard to building up strengh back , ahead events i can play futsal again but not the old ways , batminton should be ok not a problem at the moment , but still i need to follow up with the doc at bukit rimau there @@ dad took me there for needling and massage for the nee cap and the nerves .... well he said i can run now do more sports will heal faster, i've told him the pain i had he said no worry you do sit down execircs 1st then only go for running, haha ok ok i done that and now i can run but not over running it still hurts he said when you facing pain after stoping by , then i have to stop else it's a big problem .

there goes my holidays .....

PC upgraded with 2 fan

sisqo incomplete

Whoo
Ooh
Oh yeah yeah
Listen

Bright lights
Fancy restaurants
Everything in this world
that a man could want
Got a bank account
bigger than the law
should allow
Still I'm lonely now

Pretty faces from the
covers of the magazines
From their covers to my
covers wanna lay with me
Fame and fortune still can't find
Just a grown man runnin out of time

Even though it seems I
have everything
I don't wanna be a lonely fool
All of the women
All the expensive cars
All of the money don't amount to you
I can make believe I have everything
But I can't pretend that I don't see
That without you girl my
life is incomplete

Said without you girl ahh
Listen

Your perfume
Your sexy lingerie
Girl I remember it just like
it was on yesterday
A Thursday you told me you
had fallen in love
I wasn't sure that I was

It's been a year
Winter summer spring and fall
But bein without you
just ain't livin ain't
nothing at all
If I could travel back in time
I'd relive the days you were mine

Oh yeah that without you girl ahh

I just can't help lovin you
But I loved you much too late
I'd give anything
And everything
To hear you say
That you'll stay

Without ya girl
Wiuthout ya girl my life
Without you girl
My life my life is incomplete
Without you girl
My life is incomplete
Oh yeah
My life is incomplete
Oh yeah yeah
Whoo

something i found it somewhere when i'm doing my assignment.
i been busy about my work this pass week till now still busy,today went out with binwei , kokliang and geekeong ... he came back from taiwan last saturday @@ , his grandma admid to hospital ...at the same day he arrival we went to gerenal hospital there wait till 2 something and then went to A&W had some picture of beer hahaha... around 3 something we went home and sleep then next morning we heading to pc fair, i've plan to get some high rpm fan X D , ya i did ,and i did again.. bought 2 high rpm fans which is 12 cm and 8cm fan , before install to the computer , my GFX temp were 58par% after install it , it drop till 46 at start then slowly went up to 49 i still testing on it i hope it maintance at 49par% at the hiest point X D .... and everythings are working fine now...well time to rush my work again slacked for a day X D

Dinner at uptown ... called up uncle ben and told him i bought fans ... get screw !!! hahaha , he said you buy fan again !!! are you crazy . i told him that my old 12cm fan are not so good at pumping the hot air our so i go for upgrade X D.
then binwei they all also said i'm so crazy about the air flow of my cpu , dude you guys have air-con on you should know it's diffrent from me, i seldom on the air-con ,
but now normal running speed i still stricked the lower par% in the gang hahaha....
2 12cm fan out and 1 12cm fan suck in come with at 8cm fan .feeling going for the liquid thingy... but when i read most of forums they said high maintance .... so i would just plan a head for that , if i really need (actually that is extra, i still prefer fan X D.

i'll be soon here X D
.... better start my stuff now.

If you followed you should know what's ON

i suddenly feel dissy and lost forcus i've no idea what's wrong ,i'm tired but
i'm kinda hard to rest for it , seriously i've no idea what's wrong ,my body
are getting weaker , i started to see blur things and i keep close my eye , feel like
vomiting but it's doens't work, just feel not well ...

maybe i'm just tired , never hard this feeling before , body are so low in power
even typing also slow i've no idea what's wrong.Even my finger are cramped now ... i have no idea what had just happend

maybe it's my time to get a good long rest for it , i've lots things in hand
there are way more enought time to do just slacking is more then do, what's the point
tired and i'm feeling sleeping.

there might be one of the ten but i'm just one of the half now,people has no idea what am i talking maybe...someday people will understand, someday...

A can of beer that makes me dissy , and i'm totally loaded with it.maybe it's time to change the habbits about it.

Poan last night really sorry seriously can't send you to hospital,i've no idea what's going on last night with you but dude please take care about yourself , i feel bad that i did not send you to hospital, i have works to do serious that is no joke i thought you wanted to go to clinic around our house area but instade of that you said maybe going to hospital , for this i can't make it sorry really sorry.
I've msg mengz but his msn were off @@ and i kinda scare to disturb him due to most of the time i called him up he were bz so i did not called.
Until 8 something mengz called me @@ so early dude i was like no sleep at all ...
the feeling is kinda hard to tell but at least it's not april fools , poan serious went to hospital that mid night.

Pern must be wondering why would i ask her to msg me at 11.50 pern now let me tell you,if you read the following post you should know what i'm talking. X D
after all that is a fact. things are just changing.

Well i'm saving cash for final year kinda ,headache now a sum of amount still need to cover it.Save save save .... BREAD BREAD < sad case weh.

I'm getting back my food timetabble , full loaded with food nowadays the effect is just to gain back what i've lost pass month.maybe beign fatter are more cute haha
X D , as what i said was a joke just want to rebuild my timetabble and balance back everything now.

The reason....

yesterday i recieve a msg that's from estrealla , she msg me and said her father just pass away ... feel sorry for her lost.And kinda shocked ... people can just easy go away like that..
qoutes of the day "we should appreciate everyone and stop building enemys."

Fish cried at the tank and water said i know how you feel , fish said i'm in the water you can't see my tears ,water said i can't see your tear but i can feel your tear droping because it's you are inside me.

james thanks for things that you told me , i'm kinda of missing direction X D. but
don't worry i've do what i can just thanks for everything.

To my pet brother.

Hi there if you still visit here my blog,
sad to see you offline for my guess you must be blocked me or deleted me on you list , but i did not block anyone that day , i'm on a rush as i told you before, plese do understand ,i'm not small gas ,things that what i said that day were something i just want to tell you about the feeling how i feel sudelly . but yet i'm on a rush it's not a lie , or maybe you think it is a yes well ok then i'm wrong at the moment, well if you want to end a friendship like that i'm ok with everything please do remember what you read last time in my blog there is a post of blog that i menction before ,may09 2008 you should have read it before... i did not modify it's maybe it's there you din read or notice hope you will have a little reading on that.the other day i'm quite sad it's because you said something about the BROTHER things which i sudenly feel something ,that day was my birthday and i though my pet brother will remember my birthday , just sad about that and that day you sudelly trigge my mind about it with the words brother.I still remember your birthday is on april 1 serious if you have notice last year i send you a sharp msg on 12oc.

I'm not begging for anything to turn back,
if want things end let's end it in the right way
don't stucked in the middle of self emosion and react,
middle has too many missunderstood.

At least i know what's going on .... i have no idea what's going on.

A Quick leaving make everythings missunderstood.

wooo photshoop X D

huh how do you do this @@

omg where is my hand X D

jackie saw hot chix there

weeks ago happend a missunderstood converstation.

Yeap... i hate them , they always postphone stuff.. why can't you guys tell me early... i've just create a missunderstood , now i know maybe it's a faith.. that days uncle ben were at my door and i quickly end the msn thingys. when things in situation like that it create a problem inbetween, althought i thinks following uncle ben were fun buy end up they postphone... Uncle ben face were change totally haha ... then he bring me to uncle teoh there slightly tea time. Uncle teoh damn sui keep said shoot what la .. no need ga la ... this and that uncle ben keep his mouth shut and keep drinking till a phone called then uncle ben said send me to college ,need to do 3D and 2D...

Stupid james..., i went to his house to fix his slave and then you know what i found .... smart ass 
you pull out the jump cable then how would your hdd run ...JAMES ANSWER ME WITH A VERY COOL ANSWER "Eh sam i tog got power cable hdd can run and detect" yoh i don't know want to laught or want to said  just half empty and half full situation. ok den just plug in his cable and everythings work fine @@ now i know why he said no need rush ...that slave pc is use to download... so lame weh now all follow what i do Y.Y copywright leh, all my 2 old pc were change to slave to download stuff and my main pc is for my work assignment.That day james suddenly have an idea he said does the person  blocked you he can see your msg anot?i was like the person can't see because it did not longer update the user , james keep conviece me that i'm wrong then i do a small example for him to see , it's actually yes the user block you or you block the user basically people can't really see what you updated msg/tittle , you only see the last tittle he /she put. then here goes again haha james food food you owe me.... so coincidence his father were back ... ( i tell you somethings JAMES your father, can talk the whole night 1 ... salute !!!) uncle talks alot and bring us to dinner , auntie were on holidays so 3 banana went to hilton to ate @@ uncle why everytime also hilton haha .( then i notice something UNCLE SAID hei SAM THANKS FOR HELPING JAMES REPAIR HIS PC) james face were like "OH O" JAMES!!!!!!! YOU BARSTARD !!! IT's not coincidence you called up your father early !!!) ok , i'll remember you , thanks you for the meal james and thanks to your father haha. wei next time don't drop msg at blog please ,call me since i just gave you my number(Please don't pass my number to your father if he ask you said you contact me from internet !!!else not kill you)...James father is quite nice to talk with actually but not everyday hahanow  i know why james.(feel sad about you haha>in fact i glad to feel happy to you haha)

Yen seng email me , he is going to his auntie house there for working and also follow up his father stuff , i guess it's a long lost friends again... no worries he will still send me emails. at least better then nothing.

saturday night binwei they called up and i went out with them , we sit 2 car binwei driving and me , chuan and kok liang were inside both car X D . 1st we went to nasi lemak there for dinner i actuly ate so i did not really called food to eat , then later on ... all are so desprade about ice-cream then went to one utama mcdonalds there and have ice cream only desserts not more then that , before we went to MCD we went back ss3 to pump petrol then here goes the crazy parts.. binwei car has been chase by a wira then i'm behind him saw his car pull me far far away...  then i chase up .... binwei is playing with a wira and a myvi ... i were chasing up .. but can see .hopefully eveythings is quite save , binwei salute your car X D mine want to get near also abit hard. haha

See see here X D

1st

1.This is your back of your laptop all you need is a screwdriver then screw out the bottom left from picture , the hdd should be located at there so IF YOU UNDER WARRANTY DON'T DO THIS BECAUSE IT'S VOID WARRANTY.

2.after screw out the screw you should see your hdd inside mine is abit small but your should be bigger i guess.(open the cover)

3. Mine has a metal thingys blocked and also remove it.

4. This your hdd , becaful ..(picture above)

5.Slowly remove it out, DON'T PULL TO DIRECTION UP , you should pull to the left from picture above .

6.Tada you got your HDD from your laptop . ( picture above)

                                                                                      OR

7.This is an encloser , it's 2'5 inc for laptop saize HDD, take your hdd slot into the encloser then(most of the people called the external HDD CASE but there are 2 type this things , one type of encloser come all in one that means cannot open up 1 so that 1 can't be slot in your HDD if you or your friends has a encloser that can open it up that should be not a problem.( picture show above)

8.weee run with a usb ... that should be not a problem to take back your data..you can use it running with your 2'5 encloser/external hdd case , but careful external case has a bad things that is you can't drop , it also depance your luck once you drop you might lost data or total lost so becaful when you using a external HDD case.

New toy haha X D thanks you !!!

Qoutes that i found from stumble 

i have another one which i found it nice> 

it's kinda hard to explain to average person 
why we will breaking all our bones but you know what 
that's what makes our sportt so bad ass 
i don't think there is such a things as too far 
it's just the boundries just keep getting pushed 
further and further. 

Travis pastrans

what's friends means actuly? 
i have no idea with the friends is? 
just to chilling or really matter talk about facts? 
are we means to said anythings? 

i have a frinds called mengz , i knew him from poan and shintau ... from what i see is sometime is good to know him , but when come to time , he's always failed ... He help me alots this few month .Thanks alots my friends.

Things are going to change : 
sorry to people that think that i'm wrong 
wrong that i admit  
admit things that is come to conclutions 
conclutions came with a stop. 

This present you a apology gift , the reason is not what people think it just things that you can't convience inbetween,soonfatt msg were right "inbetween of trust there is a lie between in it". 
i did not make a blog to be a corward , i just don't want to tell people about it , just things you never know what's going on, that has no meaning sometimes .Does sharing is caring? well for me at the moment is yes because i think it might works on best buddies , for other fact i don't think it works ....  

uncle ben msg me last few days he said "the world is round , that why we have the night and days around us.apon of what you see might giving you a bitter well that is matter fact of life." 

just so want to tell him that i'm just half empty and half full situation.but too bad he doens't know i have a blog here X D all he know is my daily blog, with is all my chatbox are in one but diffrent places, people might think that is a blog but nope. if a friends is worth to know why not find it out X D you may found some answer inbetween.

 

A box of new motherboard I7 motherbord !!!

It's worth?

Half full Half empty?

I been asking this question for month ago uncle ben ask me this question during a weekend , i was chilling with him then he ask me this question and i said it's same , but that time i'm not sure about my answer , then till i found the answer then now i know what is this means, he's trying to tell me something now i have no idea what's that , he said something funny " the world is round , that why we can have night and day." no idea what is that means just keep in mind.

This is a game that has no facts of skill means that everytime you play you need diffrent answer X D i've finish it many times just feel this games is quite nice.

Pern conversation

This is what pern converstaion is.
Pern is my classmate , she a half thai half chinese i guess.Those 2 aren't just notice what's going on now , just now i've recieve a msg from pern said about something suprize and scarry, i've no idea what's going on but pern you should chill , it's doens't worth to let a person to made you like this way you should not fell sad about this kind of people yet it's a just a feeling of it, just no idea you made yourself sad just because that it's really worth, since he's so bad why still feel regret letting go? maybe i don't know anything about it or maybe i'm cold blood.

Don't scare me off, she almost shocked me ... but when i ask estrella about it she told me something then i just do my work. X D 

Yeah 21yo liow

It's been a long way and time i've never update due to personal reason .I hardly sense to move on to the next level , between it has something happend to finiacial problem seem ok but not, how i wish i can just tell somebody, but it's no meaning about it , i aint looking for help but i'm looking for answer. Brother said comming but nope it's not , i hope things are fine here and there just like the old days , that day i been ask myself why did i went to study for? do i really want it or what , i've the answer years ago but when i saw the pain of it ,i've break down and slow down ,i tog that was a fine amount for him but not , i've no idea how many sweat he drop just to give me a happy enjoying life and i'm not saving it just ask for more. things might change a little bit here , there goes for nothing and something now i'm middle of the sea and looking for island . Friends of mine just told me let it be how far you go it's not a fact anymore , it's how much you know.I feel the pain of it deeply , i've said i'll save more for it, i'll do more things and that but all i know is i'm just telling lies to myself, for so far what i've really done is i make a strong selection that has pain within ... just thinking it's really matter me now.

I don't care how people see me now maybe i'm just a talker , might be somebody of wannabe i just don't care about it , all i know the fact is i need to keep to myself just to know what is correct and whats wrong and what do i really need to understand and not so.I'm not good at all but at least i'm something that still contain some values in it.

march 7 it's my birthday
there are many people said that sam i'ma your best friends you know , well make it as a fact 1st ,when come to greetings they are not even a frineds of it , i did not put a notice on the web and other place all i've done is remove the real day. A fine guess for the 1st greeting  was a internet friends not so close but at least send me a msg wish. i'm suprize about that yet happy , not just anythings it's a joy of recieve it , and next was DT send me a msn msg , was really happy because he sure remember my birthdays "evendo my classmate know me 1 year ago also know my birthday, that day march 6 i was keeping my mouth shut and did not menction anything about it some of them give me a suprize wish when i reach class it's kinda happy".i'm just happy on the day but what's make me said is there are a person said that "sam i know you well" he did not wish me at all i hope that is what i heard wrong at 1st place... last year i've set into friendster and some of the website , so they know... and people said things won't change much , it's just additional somethings. for the reason i don't want to argue is i waited the correct date and blog it out and look whos your best friends now?and they do dare to said so loud about it. i just tired listening to those shit that is i live longer i know better stuff, it's piece of shit ... your story doens't contain anymore values to me because it's a lie on it.

night time actuly i did not really celebrate dad and mum said want to have a dinner and i've told them nevermind i have plans later, time pass reaching 10 binwei msg me said want to go out for tea anot so i just said ok and go out with jarryl ,kokleong,chuan and binwei , we went to mcdonalds and have some chat was very happy. After 12 chuan said sam happy birthday to me but it's over 12 de , nevermind it still a wish . just happy that day ... then went home ... uncle ben called up bring me out ... ok ok told them i'll leave soon because i'm not in the mood because of somethings happend this few month and very bad things happend to me , it's personal just don't want to menction. sat down and talk till morning , just fine sometime i don't wish to share those things because it's no meaning in it.

A funny things about here 
that day somebody ask me sam why you blog ?are you try to show something to other people?
i answer most of the people i mention of things happend most of them they don't know what's going on so means that it's just a place to let myself to tell myself what is going on by year comes .I blog because of future refrence , i show is to know what i have that time , i scare that one day i'm nothings but still i have a small little datebase of my story for my ownself to read .
recenlly i accidently went to a blog that is a couple blog i think they invite wrong email , i found out that is no meaning about it ,
they just writing a diary of words and said the writer feel about his/her love one and it's so funy at something , she said "lucky i did not want to eat so you can save up some money for future"
god i'm thinking do you really can save much with a con of ice cream? does it means everybody has 1 dollar in hand and planed how to use in future? and the male reply as "you are my loveonce and great one who know how to help me save money for future." ok no comment onto this, there are something i not use to see in the blog , picture ..... and lucky  i did not take any of it. 
after being a victim of wrong email to enter people blog i've change my mind blog are really not for secret one wrong press you had some wrong move into it.I just found out that blog has no meaning about it , it was like something happend and add on words and she wrote like things are so touching and yet matter of facts i've no idea what's the real reason, maybe he want the male things that she is great to him and him is great to her .... sort of things like that i've just no idea what is that , just so no meaning .....


all being this long year i've pass my birthdays quietly ... i did not really plan to have a party or what .. i just plan to see something that is what people said friends are use to be, from now on i don't believe that things like i know you well, because they doesn't know .After this they might said i'm busy about something and other reason ... no need tell me no need to explaint because you did not own me anythings. i'm ok with it just i found out what friends really means now.

i told uncle ben before if you failed to remember people birthday don't ever said you know he/she well because it may cause something in future... he told last few days ago yes you are correct i do agree with that , uncle ben was in sick this few week i've no idea what just happend he looks tired and not very happy maybe business had some problem, i'm ok with that , as i told myself it's no meaning to share something that people can't help , yet the answer is yourself .I do care about my friends , and i make sure they do treat me like a friends also.

My new toy 2 week ago

it's been long time @@ actuly i bought my new pc anyway X D
it's 2 week old now X D

my pc spect is :
Mainboard : Asus M3A78
Chipset : ATI Technologies Inc
Processor : AMD Athlon 64 @ 900 MHz (Phenom 9850 Quad-core 2.5 Ghz)
Physical Memory : 4096 MB (2 x 2048 DDR2-SDRAM )
Video Card : Nvidia Corp NVIDIA GeForce 9500 GT
Hard Disk : 1TB Western Digital, 500GB Seagate
sDVD-Rom Drive : TSSTcorp CDDVDW SH-S223F
Monitor Type : Samsung 22 inchs wide screen , Samsung 22 inchs wide screen
Network Card : Realtek Semiconductor RTL8168/8111 PCI-E Gigabit Ethernet NIC
Network Card : D-Link Inc DFE-528TX/530TX+/538TX Fast Ethernet Adapter (DL 10038C Chipset)

for this rig i'm facing a problem that is the GFX temp is kinda high so i went for and upgrade that cost me RM18 for that high rpm fans ...

nothing much happend just doing assignment 3D and 2D nowadays . quite many work to do ...
free time? not really the time when i was free is around mid night because finish work ... that is my free time.

1st assignment at 3D lab

erm this is my college pc spect ...no idea haha but i know the graphic card cos me a bomb haha...
enought me to hatam 1 amd X4 out.pretty nice for this pc

here goes my 1st assignment X D
kinda crazy with this .. but most of the time  is kinda lack of time ... skill problem Y.Y
just want to said it's going crazy day by day .... will be uploading due to i going to make a portfolio
soon .... here goes something new for me , i learn it 1 day and this is what we get in 1 week.

spend few days to work it out.... finally haha seriously i not very happy with this because i don't have time to do more detail works so i figure it out next assignment i will spend more time into it as in crazy mode .... i'll be siting near the pc for hours quite nice , i finally get it into the computer class hard way for the pass now is computer way .....

5.30 !!!!
yesterday 5.30 afternoon there is a call ....
hellow is this SAMSUNG !!!
> AR .... who's this?
i'm jane frome computerwar .
> itzzit my warranty is done ?
yes , can you bring you claim paper.... thank you
> oh thanks .

wah seh she called me SAMSUNG Y,Y sad la .... no comment ..
it's time for bed !!!! 3 oc de haha sleep sleep morning class wohoo !!! 

lazy to write see picture la X D

too long din update Y.Y so lazy write haha

what's going on?

some people make i feel worry ,
i've no idea what's the point,
you just said something unexpected,
i treat you like my son, just because i want to be your father .
not just a name uncle .
Uncle Ben you scare me after that night , i've no idea why you send me that sms .
Kinda a confuse for me , i'm slumber , stunned and why did you send me something like this.

I did not call back or sms back because it's kinda a late and i hope it's only a prank sms.
i don't want things get worst and worst ....till today i still did not call up and reply , maybe tonight i call him out and talk.

Last 3days

Spot the diffrent? 
Which one is real 1 eh ? 
sure can see la got tip de 1 haha X D

weee i'm back to post my 1st post ....
as you all know i'm very very busy that true .. X D
friday is my last final was so enjoy after pass up 2d animation , 2d animation is more on time usage , because the computer that can do 2d is only 2 computer working at the lab , imagine we are having a 30+ people in a class sharing 2pc that is working ... the most hard part is to use the computer ... and yet the lab close at 12 midnite we manage to stay over night at one of the day which is we rush for it and thanks for the senior help .well well well look at the bright side X D it's over .

Friday night dinner time i went out with simon and had dinner at MingTien , was waiting Mr J comming over here to gather up and chit chat... later on simon phone up his cousin ask for tea time almost 10 something i guess wao his cousin was very busy at his work but later on 11 something he's here , we went to puchong OLD TOWN  WHITE COFFEE there , after one cup of coffee simon cousin JAVIN said we change place and met my boss well i'm ok with that ... we went to another place near puchong hospital there erm no idea for the name , Javin intro me his boss and another partner or the boss , on the moment i met Alvin and nicky , alvin is the boss of javin and nicky was a young guy who own 10 optical shops , i can't imagine how they do it until they told us thier story , nicky is only 25 years old erm sound young eh he take 2 year to get 10 optical shop from zero to now , he also driving a bmw that make me salute in his age , same goes to alvin but alvin is abit older , from what i hear from his knowleadge , more of his concept are facts that turn to words ... more like things that he read on the book and now he's telling the understanding of the book , well as i know most people share thier life experience it's just beacause they want to remind thier self this is true , as times goes i ask alots of question and Alvin also told us alots of his story and how he start and drop fall and rise again , kinda a cool spend almost 3 to 4 hours ...
Went home ... simon fetch me haha X D

Before i reach home i asked simon mind drove me to ss2 , my hdd just had a problem since last fews days , i drop it on the floor yet ... aiks ... data gone ... i need to recovery all the file back , then he said ok , and after reaching hom , it's time to start Hydraskins project , kinda my plans ...
sleep at 5 something...

Saturday 
the next morning 9 30 i was arlamed wake .... i called simon up and he said give me one more hours to sleep ... he had like 6 hours to  sleep yet me i only have 3 hours to sleep ... aiks , reason why i wake up so early because i want to repair my hdd and my pet bro destop... 10 30 simon called me back and said lets move ... shocking ...@@ reach ss2 around 10 45 like that then i send to warranty and went for lunch and go home, repair computer ... wired eh ide was working and sata is not working , then i went to mengz place and check out the hdd , was suprize that 2 hdd of it has a error can't load windows and keep bluescreen went come to black screen loading ... wao.. i guess is the hdd problem @@... around 8 bernard call me up but i did not pick up , until 8 30 @@ then i realize i forget to do something, went to check my phone ... SHIT !!! GATHERING AT SHELL I FORGOT !!!!! quickly bath and went to kelana Jaya shell meet them up woa lucky i'm not the last one to the gathering haha , we all chit chat and waiting at shell there waiting for other people is on the list ... jssim was here wao great to see him weh , then comes scarxx came , then we went to OLD TOWN WHITE COFFEE again (man i been going OLD TOWN WHITE COFFEE LIKE TEN TIME IN A WEEK man.....)bernard , jen huang they all haven ate thier dinner same goes me , but i'm on diet because quite fat before holidays doens't move at all ...eat talk drink ... until 12 something bernard make a move then we move to another place because  OLD TOWN GOING TO CLOSE SOON so we just change place and bernard are heading back home ,change to SYED ... tea there left 4 person and saihoe came ....he attended some wedding dinner ... jssim was telling us what is worth to buy for the car... talk alots of things in the car , yet i just notice they all are in high professional job list , like jssim is selling handphone , scarxx is working inside nissan i have no idea what he told me about his position , all i know is some kind of things that he need to take care of the car making process... somethings like that ...bernard stydy for business , and ken and saihoe is on holidays, jenhuang is selling car stuff  just so i know .... not bad huh X D
then around 2 oc people are getting lesser and lesser left me and scarxx, then barca call ... actuly i damn pity barca 1 eh he always work until midnite 2oc ... we meet him up another place 3rd round of TEA TEA  they called it TT , near by sea park ... talk until 4 something they make a move and i saw jarraly they all was here , so i heading to 4th round of tea , serious man this is crazy 6 hours of tea cost me around RM20 for the 6 hours but it's worth i get the knowledge , Chuan invited me on 24th a bbq party , so yeah before 24 i must came back to kl to celebrate with them .. the tabble got Ykin , ping wei , jarraly , chuan , kok liang , and one more i forget his name they all asked me to join the 24th BBQ party so i just confirm with them ....then went home ....around 5 i reach home and yeah it's time to continew my Hydra project, else i can't finish in time . i do until 7 oc then i went to sleep

Sunday
wake up at 11 oc , due to micheal call and shit i forgot i need to help him shift house , he said his housemate is crazy and dirty he lost alots of stuff and the smell of the house is like SHIT.... oh lord , he just can't stand anymore so i reach sunway there around 12 oc and finish shift all the things to kai house about 2 hours , then went to prymid for lunch , then just i want to reach home .... mengz called!!!! SAM WANT GO PC FAIR ARR !!!!
after he said i just said eh i no car leh cannot go later dad need to use car, my car went to workshop jor ..., then he called poan haha so lucky weh poan also said ok , poan was telling i'm not driving eh , then ..... mengz decide to drive haha.....so we share share with the petrol and parking lo reach klcc around 3 somethings ... and took alots of brocher , just for my own knowledge , finally I7 is out and what i see now is i7 is useless ... our os only reach 4gb for reserve and only 64bit mobo will acceted to 4gb or more , the motherboards of the i7 has a lots of heatsing i guess this machine sure hot like hell ...just had a look at it , pass sometime there ....
mengz purpose going for pc fair is for shooting ... wah seh ... he bring his D40 come out weh ... haha no harm la he just want to shoot too booth for refrence ... many company cut cost to build a booth , evendo dell also doing promotion. then head back to pj for dinner , went to weng heng there for poridge , weng heng bluff us he said not raing there , when we going back that time kl was rainng and i called weng heng and ask got RAIN ARR? he said " NO ARR " when we reach there he said arr it just rain ... sei chai ... play 9 us arr ... fine nvm lucky got nice place to sit if know kill you haha ...just after i finish i saw Chonghaur and Peicheng so i talk to haur about the things i going to do ... then i left mengz and poan to the tabble and sit towards Chonghaur , we started to talk and plans... and i found out why justin was so freak out in his work and i'm shocked to hear that ...just no comment .went house quite late around 1 somethings then reach home repair the pc again wah seh i serious think is the HDD problem , my other 3 ide HDD is working fine on the cpu .... no idea just left it there and i went to do my project.........
 

People around me and thinking what am i

i met a friends few years back, he has the same problem that i've , we been sharing problem togather, his situation was bad , mine was still ok , i might have some slight pain in the cold days or those raining days , but for his he can't even take air conditional , it makes him more pain , somehow i guess my pain is already a fact , and i know how to cure it , his was in the warning ... at least i still can run but for him nope walking yes. his injury were same as mine footballs, but he mess it up on 3 times and the doctor are giving him waring no to run anymore just walk . he told me if you got a clue , who not use the gule? i don't get what he means at first , but when he telling things about him , i get somethings on my mind , and i finally got it. My leg is backing up to my old days and i must love it , like what he said. just thanks.

people will never believe you , till they saw a fact.
people always thinking people are telling lies, in fact that is why don't start and don't judge.

people are always selfish , they said they won't , try think carefully 

people said if i'm selfish i will do this and this .. so do you think i'm selfish?
people always use people like an excuess.
people think amazing stories are fake , yet lies.

people always don't think amazing things could happend , yet out of sudden.
people always said you use an excuess.

people is hard to understand, how well you know is not how much you know a person.

people always think we talk on phone are making fake phone calls

Something i want to tell my self what i saw and what i remember above
I told them i'm driving an engine code 4G63 , and you know what they told me bullshit that engine cost a bomb.The real fact is they doens't know anything about it, and it has sohc and dohc.
so i keep thier mouth shout just opening the bonet X D.

well most of the time i said my leg is pain  most of the people would said it's a fake ,Interesting part was i my self know my limits , i could walk up the hill with my naked leg but cycling i can make it to the top,do you realize that i always walk slow? so you think i want to slow down eh? make your own statement.Sometimes i will keep pressing my hand to make my blood presure go well most of the people think i'm acting on it , so if that so i'm still acting X D , wait till who to find outs?Does it bother you?then why ask and judge me?

they said i'm not but they are , i always rememeber my friends said that to me it's because of you if not i would not blah blah blah .... come on it doens't make sence ok if it's me they why are you accepting it at the first moment?so who's the selfish one? me? Or other examples is "if you were leave us alone at that night i would not argue with her , why you left? so it's my fault? you are blamming on me? fine my bad ? joke are in the air look what the joker just said ? the joker forget his funny joke!!!.

you know my uncle always use me as an excuess due to he don't wish to see somebody , and i would be the sitter.many of my friends do to , sam la he made us late... , oh well it that so i'm sorry i don't meant that guys , but it's the tea time is 10 , you guy probably will be this way you come at at 10 sharp and we alway reach there 30 min late so i gues it's my fault huh?

you know what ? i always out with uncles but they tog i'm crazy or i'm a gold digger , yes if you think what you think it would be a yes , just because you can't get some of them or maybe you really doens't understand the social life ? yes for you if i'm a gold digger , you strike a bingo for yourself , but for me it's all wrong, going out with older peoples doens't mean that , they actully face alot of things and they told you not too... at first my frienst mengz thought i'm gay because i'm out with older mans and older friends , don't know what is he thinking, later on he agree and told me that wao going out with older people is an experience ...... so amazing !!!! yet i have to suffer the buller attack to made a statement of it.... how sad is people in life......

i always has amazing happend ... out of a sudden my friends called me out and sometimes i'm always confuze in the middle of time when two diffrent group friends called you don't know how to choose .. yet i always done a quite idea go A and go B i always made that they said ... i spoil the fun fine i admin that ... fair and square.

i hope i have tons of excuess so that i can made my friends to believe, but inface excuess can't be explanint so why are you guys listening to the excuess?skip it all , just forget about it.Ask and can't accept what could that be ....?

a converstaion !!! sam i know you well , you been chaning all the time were you trying to get someting on me?Oh sorry i don't know that you know me so well... until i ask some question that you probably can't answer me the answer...?eh eh eh busy right now talk to you later.Oo you know what until the sun rise , this guy trying to pull aways the questiong and msg me other things ...sort of like EXCUESS ... To be smart to me , i would not ask a question secound time . you should answer the question before you going to other tittle. Yet you said you know me well.
You just understand my social life, you doens't know my personality ... what i do will suprize people and will not give people a ? i go for a good reason but i did not use the reason to sort of somethings else. so do you know me well?do i ever have a real realationship?why do my house have so many cars?haha .... guess what you never know and you just split the words....

sometimes it's share that older friends call you weird name , so you would probly walk aways ... but people thought you are chating with GOLD.so no comment, sometime phone ring we do accept the call or maybe we make a call , less make it this way when i making a call some people tog that i do it on purpuse , you want to know why , they probably said why don't you call before blah blah .... people do forget , helow we ain't computer .... human brains has limits ....if you want to think what you thinking go a head no one stop you because who ever stop you were yourself , no one can stop you on that because you already believe it's a fake .

This do no harm to anybody , i just joging down for my future .
if that is a lie , then make it a lie.

Give and take , don't expect all.

last week what happend....
i help Dennis formated pc wao it took me 6 hours at his house to finish the formating ... it's not i can't format the pc is the pc has a sligh problem and make keep delay me ... then later on i try 2 IDE and sata to format it works !!! but .. end up my IDE get 2 window ... sad about that but nevermind i help dennis to formated his pc , finally 1 years ago so many people helped him formated pc and yet , they din't really formated the pc , and they just recover the windown frankly i done that to dennis few month ago but it's doens't work out then this time i really spend time to help him format because i'm on holidays haha lucky you + i get new knowledge , so i would not regret the time i spend.

later on Pang ring me on , he said Sam any idea where to get vista? or xp?
i told him aiya no need mah fan la come to my house later i help you settle....30min later he called again and i was with dennis , we were having tea at syed so he came to fetch me and i leave dennis with arron. He shocked me i thought he  mention the destop installation but it's the laptop one @@ oh my ... new pc with no OS haha ok first time ... then try on my Vista Ultimate version with 25 cd keys lucky me haha X D i get it from one of the friends that work in one computer parts company .. he gave me 25 cds key to test it out for the problem and actuly he just talk cock haha he gave me because of i help him before , yet the cds key are free from his manager so i would use it wisely.his new laptop wao i din know that installing window vista os i kinda a fast haha, so outdate weh, then help him download the laptop driver.. finish lo ...later on few hours later !!! ring ring again @@ sure got problem 1 , but this is not my vista problem is the modem problem haha eazy la , i been explore for few month on modem so it's so easy to fix the problem , pang came to my house and pick me up again ... 10 min like that i finish and i'm going home haha . another happy face on it .

One week 2 pc done in 100% wao i feel happy when i fix things X D.

erm i tell you last week i been around with wei chern , wing wah , chee hoe and etc etc haha
always call them on 9oc 10 oc buy movie ticket and lepak for 2 hours then only watch the movie....always talk about cars ... erm ok i like cars haha so i will join the fun too ...

Stupid uncle give me a prank called ....
Eh is this mr.SAM XXX XXX?
ya? who's calling?
This is maxis center.
ya what's wrong?
we found out that you data tranfer are over limited.we are going to charge you for that.
i though it's free for 3 month ?
oh did you read the TNC ?
ya i did they said for the 1st time change to postpaid i can have 3 month free for data transfer?
oh no no the data transfer doens't include online conversation such as yahoo msg , msn ,skype and so on.
HUH!so how much do i need to paid for next month ?
due to you have outstanding bills you have to paid for next month is RM100 for the bill and another additional Rm100 for data tranfer  thank you.
WHAT !!!
( I HEAR PEOPLE LAUGHT BEHIND !!!!)
then i turn around and see , uncle and auntie ... talking to me is auntie ...phew hardly hear her voice... wah lau you saw me on cafeteria no need give me pranks called what ... by the ways my bill are not that expensive , around 30 to 40 per month. and i seldom use data transfer but got 1 day i forget to turn it off , no idea how much it cost @@ but sure cos a bit. actuly we was planning to go home that time, my friends were tired and they wanted to send me home so i guess no need ba uncle here , so change tabble  and talk haha ....

Uncle so free !!!!
Uncle on holidays wor , he said want to  have a future planning for he himself wor so , auntie tell me uncle now very free jor you know what to do la ... choi !!!! don't want la i smart 1 ok, uncle said eh sui chai so i can have more time talk to you la , you no need sien ma ... wah kao !!! uncle no no next week i start sem liow cannot talk to you haha ....
then uncle give me funny face said aiya yala yala get what you want like forget uncle la ... no la it's not forget you la uncle ... it's i don't want to disturb you ma ,haha sure anot , got which time i bluff you 1?see told you no!!!! he said serious ga next week start sem? me and auntie planning to go europe wor . see i told you i smart 1 haha go holiday ba , go 2 come 3 ok X  D !!! how manny week you going ? one week enought la sei chai ... i miss you ma .
wah lau ... !!! excues !!!so gay la you ... lucky auntie can  joke around one if not haha later don't know what happend ...chat chat send me home haha .

RAPIDSHARE ACCOUNT
I gona to earn one soon, my internet business are doing fine and i have money to get a  premium account for rapidshare account, yet i still asking to share , it's not i can't afford, i'm kinda wana share for some of my friends , mengz rang me up and tell me he got 3 people to share ... that is too much la bro, then did update him ...

someone promiss me to bring me to a place but end up ... kit flying.
playing with the bar for few days and it give me pain ... for a week .
running at the park and my leg doesn't feel that pain that much.
went to see doctor  for body balacing , end up my upper body is heavy then lower body so it will hurt my legs , that why it took years but not healing in good ways.
i pump presure to my leg for 1days the next days was sit in the house for the whole day..
move = pain.
Feed me with foods and i'll grant you with goods.
if i beg it for goods make sure you help it worth.
there is always give and take .
why people expect more ?
understand that situation before you make a move.
i giving an examples why do you make it real !!!
if it's a joke you can't take you , rather don't tell people you can make jokes.

 

i'm not the best but at least i'm not that bad....

Why people take it so serious when it's a joke? I really have no idea why , the last time you know me were years ago ... you said you know me well ? or maybe that is just a pulling relationship?i'm starting to understand  , and i'm just feel that my helps to everyone are fair , i been helping around so much people yet friends.I'm not trying to be somebody, what makes you thinks that is what you wish to be, yet don't apply it on me i'm not.Things just happend like that ... the few days ago i went out and think again and again... what's made life?life means? i'm so bored yet there are no one to accompany me , i wish somebody could talk to me whole day long but , it's not posible to happen...


I'M NOT THAT BEST BUT AT LEAST I"M NOT THAT BAD
Yes , i wrote down this statement  last few weeks ago , many people ask me about it and some said  that i'm worst then bad. so how far can this sentance go?

DT conversations
aiks sam i'm worst then bad...I'm so unprofessional ...
 huh what happend?
today i  take a half day leave, for interview other party time works project.
 Oo then what makes you said that?
i'm so stupid , i push the interview aways.
 OO huh then why you take leaves?
my mistake i should not push that interview.... aiks.....
 wao how you push?
i went into the room and i tell them i  got few more project on hand.
 ha then ? actuly what's the point? interview?
i should not said that , i should see the project 1st then only push it always they tog i'm a freelancer , but i'm not i'm a worker .
 then ?
i should look at the project 1st if  a bit wasted of time i guess i can let it go.
 Oo why don't you  have that sence  at that moment?
ahlah don't want to said la sad liow.
 haha bro you know what everyone made mistake...
yup, but i scare this affect my future line...
 ermm that i can't help haha.
DT msg me about this.and also share some infomation with me . he give me some advice about study and tell me do well in the school time and make great works to show your future boss impress them with your skill and much more .thanks alot dude .

Still are people strugging about my tittle.. 
well somehow i'm still confuse to tell people about this but nevermind, this will give me an answer when time comes, i do believe sometimes we know our self good , but when we compare with other this tittle were always useful.

last week went out with wei chern and wing wah, went out for movie , 1st day we went to watch Wall E and the next night we watch Death Race  nice movie haha .. and chilling night you know what that wei chern so cheap weh .. drive so fast go home , he did not wait us ... aiks 2 cars going to oneu. wing wah and i went to play that game haha we reach stage 4 then kong ... aiks sad can't finish that game weh.. so fun it's all about teamworks.

MAYBE IT'S TIME TO FORGET ABOUT DRIVING
i figuring driving nowadays were so expensive... not feeling to drive a car nowadays kinda wasted money , aiks dad this few weeks come back late i guess he's rushing on someone project. but it seem i'm so stupid ... i should work for money should not work for item... but it's hard for uncle ben to do that , because i'm working for few weeks only , so have to accept the fact....

MY PHONE WERE DEAD!!!
guess what my phone kong ... it dies Y.Y have no phone to use ..figuring to get a new phone but i'm still saving money for it so i guess i find a old model 2nd hand phone to use 1st... i'm thinking getting a w960i or htc diamond... price range  3 more month for w960i  and for htc need another few weeks to get that . X D

It's not i call you all failure , you make your self look like a failure.

wao... i got an aeroplane phone calleds from someone close , all i have to said is FUCK !!! It's not i want to said that you are a time manage failure , and you promiss me come on la , it not the matter of friends of what shit , if it's a friends you can treat them like that , you think you can treat you customer diffrent? it's just another bullship..

It happend like this before morning ...
sam weh want go jogging anot , 
 erm ok what time?
arrr morning lo i would be very early ...
 arr wei wei wei what time eh?
i call you la 
 ok wei call till i wake up !!! ok !!
ok la ok la ....

Morning .... 7oc was awake see phone no called then sleep again
i tog 8oc so i keep on sleep untill 12 oc i wake up ...
wah lau .... no msg no called ... wah seh ...TULAN !!!
already know kena FFK la sien jor la .. the trust between you and me was drop like water....
then went to bath and ate my lunch called up poan ...i want to go to digital mall and get my stuff back ... i phone him and ask him it's a free time going out a trip with me? he said yaya free faster come ... another FUCKER !!!! i waited outside 15 min leh you called me came came ... then no said sorry also like i wrong ... ok i keep quite ... you all said you all will not treat customer like your friends .. so friends can be delay can ffk or maybe too close no need said sorry? sorry also keep back arr? come on bro ... that is why i said people failed ...you guys just give me more failed into my mind for you guys... 1st time like this is still acceptable 2nd time 3rd time it's not funny anymore ... and it look stupid ok.

To digital mall .... 
before i went there steven called , sam wanna game?
 eh can wait me arr?
why?
 i need go digital mall get my modem weh 
eeeeee me at digital mall ...
 OO weh i come over fetch you la you wait me there ok?
erm ok ok what time you here?
 soon la after i bath i come over stright la.
Ok ok i heading to mcd for lunch.

I went to get my warranty modem ... aiks another one i give them full set they give me modem back i have no words ... they said this and that ... i think you lost the box eh?just tell me stright no need turn and wasted my time 30 min at the counter ... then find a replacment adapter and tell me can work one trust me , is not i don't trust you it's the matter or law or quality ... wah lau sien la i don't want to argue la just take the modem and ciao la ... that why i always said digital mall always had bad service and they always use dirty trick ...

those dirty trick that they use ...
my warranty was on april , you know today i only get the modem ...
i went there about 4 times ... between those month ... they get the modem but my expire date was on august...  they keep until today only give me and tell me just came finish warranty back ...BULL SHIT before that i went there without my waranty bill you guys told me you got few modem was in the desk and ask me to bring my warranty paper to check itzzit mine ... from that day i know my modem was claim back but they did not notice me ... wait till warranty dead only give .... those service i can totally give you a F. SALE MAN ALSO LIKE THAT SUMORE THE SERVICE CENTER THAT GUYS ALSO LIKE THAT... AREN'T THOSE ARE FAILURE WORKS?NO COMMENT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

afternoon  5oc
pasar malam tea with poan waiting mr.FFK come ... after digital mall mr.FFK called me .. 
Eh want tea mo ?
 Oh?
where you ? i just called poan he said he free.
 Really arr he at my car leh !! 
Oh where you guys ?
 aiyee go jalan la...
aiya go jalan no call ...
 ha where dare call you wor later FFK me how eh...
!$%*(@$)_!*(#&$&!#_serious where you guys?
 comming back la
so on or what ?
 ON what time you comming ?
i fetch my sister go see doc then come over la.
 how long ohh?
ermm 15 min like that la...
 OH listen 1st arr....
HA ... ok la ok la later meet
 

Me and poan 4 30  reach syed .... MR.FFK came at 5 oc !!! 
then talk talk ... until almost 6 all sit my car go back my house planning to walk pasar malam .
walk buy stuff eat this and that lo , poan going home , he need to fetch his sister  so bye bye. after buying some foods went to padang there ... i use to work out there ate all the stuff then ... talk starting with idea story and planning ... ok fine if you are serious i would think about it if you just talk to entertain sorry bro i only can entertain you talk i'm not wasting my brain power to think ... my white hair is growing like F1.... around 7 went back home

nap sekajap !!!!
RING RING RING .... BERNARD called !!! 
eh samson tonight on mo?
 wassup?
celebrate Jenhuang real birthday ...
 ermm ok what time ?
around 8 30 la , malaysian time 
 so means come late ga ?
i'll be there 8 30 8 45 la 
 yee ok ok .... C U THERE

haha i 9oc only reach there ... 
all reach there wah lau i late leh haha nvm nvm haha sorry sorry my bad haha , i went to toilet haha .. Xcues la ok la ok la my bad la .... tea tea go go where where? esso there around there got mamak we tea there la consider recelebrate with jen huang la oh okie okie ....tea talk tea talk till 11 something then go back on they way back ....

RING RING RIN !!!!
oie pet pet kat mana?
 oie gu gu apa mau?
oie i mau gay sama you eh! mana lu?
 woi wa kat luma sini la ... lu mau gi mana?
eh la i mau cari lu cakap cakap....
 wah seh apa angin tiup you pangil say...
aiyeee wa punya kawan semua tidur , so cari awak .
 Oh ini macam arr, wa sudah broke ...
arla jom uncle belanjar beer lai...
 sure bo?wa ta mau pandu weh...
ok la you mest teman me minum arr...
 ok la sampai marbuk ka?
arlo macam itu la... ok la i sekarang pergi luma awak 
 Oh okie i park kereta dulu....

10min later ....
pon pon !!! wah seh pukul apa eh uncle ... i tau you pandu kereta mewah la jangan la pon pon ... he laught sumore....kena jar.... went to sunway pub ... beer all the way 3 jars macam i pandai minum .... wah seh i drink drink non stop ... uncle you not good la , you happy happy called 3 jars i cannot masuk dalam lucky not me drink all ...talk talk talk .... i tired liow leh actuly ...
before that i want to nap that time get disturb .. aiks ... then sumore talk till 1 something ... pengsan lo ....only send me go home ...lucky not marbuk !!! haha i drink around 5 to 6 cups others uncle sapu !!!!

then go home sleep .... sweetdream..... This post was actuly saved at 2something last night haha .... 

My last week and it's my expose

The night life when i was in penang

This is taken when i was in penang

This is what i drink in the morning


it's not what you think

 
Random

This is what i won at the a contest

gurl see i told you , YOU STEAL MY DOLL !!!!

My dog and i taken a picture pass week

My dog was not in the mood of taking picture because i did not let him go pee outside
so he kinda sad Y.Y haha so bad la me after 2 oc midnight i only let it go VV


My new sim card for private use

One of the boss upgrade my line thanks you very much 
guess what do you think i got a new phone?
haha who's knows anyway....
no more prepaid said Bye Bye

My sofa bed 

This is a bed that i sleep most of the time 
but sometimes got visitor come i have to sleep other sofa
i'm not sleeping on my bed because it's hot and it's kinda lazy to climb down
my bed was a D-deck bed my father plan for me is lower deck if for my computer
but i'm out of space so ... i shifted to outside.... more space more relax
GOT AIR CON OHHH X D BUT AFTER I SLEEP LIOW MUM OR DAD CLOSE IT
SAD SO MOST OF THE TIME I'M BLOWING FANS HAHA

My new graffiti project on my back streets

This is what i bought for my project
i wanted to spray green and have orange eyes brown is for the 
shadown or outline but haven got any idea of the still working on it
maybe going for Black and White concept i think it's kinda a cool.

This is a book given , when i was in secondary  top student
 

My cert i have been to rakan muda program

I been there for few time but manage to get once with cert and it haven printed my name
because that time was rushing back to home for family dinner... sad hope one day 
i free i print my name on it , it's 100% mine X D nor a fake one

This is the cert i recieve when i got the book

those days i was quite hardwroking until i recieve this 
start study and understand....

My first year and major year assignment and brief
 

some of the design

RATIONAL

CONCEPT

Mind- Maps

RESEACH

SKETCH


My sketch for one of the assignment

final piece

Me and my group done the last minute assignment and it worth a perfection marks

we have the most argument on this assginment and we are the
most reconize group and high score and good presenter like me
we call it "monamanson" also known as the 3M
Matrix, Marylin Manson and Monolisa
and this is the time i manage to flame all the groups 
we are the last group to present
when othe group was finish present we keep ask question
the plan was made the whole class angry about us and 
our plans works ... 
thanks for those question because the group of people doens't ask question
to make them ask you need to bring them down 
this is the most sucess planning of overall
thumbs ups!!!!

Picture about my backups

This is what i'm having , i invest money on this kind of stuff incase black outs
my computer will never dies ,it will when the lighting stricked no comment about that
....

Those days when i'm freelancing

This is what i use and how i spend my money for my past years

My judge ball i play it all the time

Do you believe that i play this 3 balls for 1 year and i'm still stupid of doing judge on it
FAILED NO COMMENT HAHA

My computers space

as you can see here i have anot of wiring here due to i have no space to land my stuff
I land it on the floor to have a good space,i my self love computer so when you see my
computer got weird things don't ask it's a good machine 
this machine doens't over heat at all i'm been try on 1 month 
the result is good , not rising and not droping just stable.


This are my expose ... for all this years...

My week was buzy working actuly ... sometime Urgent and i need go back and do those and tell them kinda a sad la but aiks , if not he giving me those nice parts i would not work for it.... it's a good exchange also not giving me money but giving me computer parts how attractive is that ...
lucky i'm still on holidays , i still can go back and tell storys and drink tea haha .If not i'm in deep shit ... no comment.

last week i keep searching for friends to tea with
They said samson acting weird wor ... ok fine i admin it la kinda strange also , you all know what i always want to talk , because when i was in study mood you can never see me talking that much so appreciate this time and have all the fun time !!! haha , actuly they said i'm crazy ... i'm actuly paid a sum of money go to talk to people ,as in like i went to penang i actuly go there find those uncle and talk haha you know i can talk whole day long with uncles happy weh , you know when you find someone that you can talk in a group it's a great things , not just all the time serious , but jokes are always on , even we can laught until pain... my sister told me don't lah make people happy until pain you how old they how old , aiks i wish there were young enought to handle haha but nvm la , at least i get to talk to people what .. i know many things ... 

Forum gathering ....
CHEY YOU ALL SO BAD LA PEOPLE 21year old birthday leh give face la abit ....aiks sad i tog many forumer going all, when i reach there all sms to me and said can't make it ... wtf !!! you guys own me one haha , they said re-celebrate with him on comming tuesdays because it's not the actul days so ok i forgive you all haha jenhuang said belanjar me tea on tuesdays so see lo ...also lucky that i did not drive wira go ... that car actuly dies ... my mum drove to somebody house and it dies at people gate ... then father friends come and toll the car back to house and it's midnight ... so no hope saturday night sumore ... 2morrow sunday ... aiks need wait till monday lo see can heal anot the uncle said monday only can help the car because no worker in the workshop... 

Uncle Tan lorry killed somebody
last years dad friends was shifting office at penang , some one come out and said Uncle Tan lorry actuly killed someone on last years about 14 months ago ... wah lau so long liow ... only come out and said and they said it's the lorry driver hit and run ... no comment now waiting for news.. hope it's was a mistake.dad also kinda a stress on this news...maybe people pull a trap in to the good hands... who knows...A N W A R IS G A Y what it's true?hope it's not true...

Saturday afternoon ....
Before saturday night i actuly called wei chern for tea then he was asking aiyee me and you arr boring macam ... then i said ok lo see who live nearby then call lo .. mumyong (X) mumhong(X)
wingwah (X) kaiyee (X) .. then he said want go eat ice cream ....go to center point then he said arrr don't want eat ice cream la where to go arr? then i said go my place there la ... he said good idea wor then went to ss3 syed .. later ... he said again wei boring la what to do ... around 4 oc in the morning i said no need think we go home 2morrow we go lunch ok? actuly he's on converstaion with kaiyee also talk about lunch things so actuly i nothing do so confirm with him lo early morning 11 oc waked up stupid dog jump on my soft asking for trouble ... he want go poo poo... aiyeee sad la wake me up my mum 4get to open the door for it ...then called weichern confirm what time ... he said 1 oc la then 1 oc i wake up i quickly go bath i tog he comming on the way then 1 30 i call again he said cham lo no car how how how arr you wait arr my mum comming back soon ... oh okie then wait lo wait ha wait ha aiks sien la i go polish car la .....polish until 3 oc he called wei i comming ... then i went to bath again hot weh .... then 30 min later i call again wah ur ldp from where eh he said wei BIG PROBLEM LDP GOT ACCIDENT ...HA... ok lo i wait lo what to do ... haha then 3 45 reach my house ... then go to wingwah there 4oc sharp reach kaiyee there about 20 min ...he called that lunch !!!! but lucky i went for lunch when i waiting him ...then he said tea lo yam cha lo .... go to ONEU lo walk walk see see lo go play arcade lo.....so called lunch !!!

SUNDAY ARRRR 
Need to go "BAI BAI" my grandmother arrrr ....aiyee you know arr i cannot tahan the smoke 1 la ... go there flu !!! lucky my guma call me sit a side haha, i put some"HIONG" then i go under tree there because they having the BOAT SENDING THINGS ... so need to wait until 4oc aiyee
then dad drove us to kajang ... EAT SATAY wor .. sad things my dad lock me inside car because i was asleep my guma and daipak laugh i said aiks sad liow see i told you all i accident born 1 what my dad laught and said no la i hear all closing door liow ma so i tog you were down ... NO COMMENT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! haha jokinng with him la he also ok my mum just lalalalala pretening nothing happend haha not sad la just joking haha every were laughing .... maybe it's true aiks but nevermind ba it's alredy a fact haha .after hours of waiting ... satay came ... sad waited so long ... sien ... talk too much no water drink DIE SOON haha... then dad drove to another place for dinner ..EEEE 6 oc only leh ... around that area eat normal things la ... fish , meat , sayur those la ... then send daipa home and go home .... guma car was at out house so reach home around ... 7 dirty lo ....den i went to bath ... 9 oc barca msg me called me for dinner ..oh okie ...he told me 11 something got ball see so he said 11 something only go ... i go slacking for few hours and went out to meet him...kinda nice guys la someone really can talk all day long maybe just abit diffrent .. haha but's it's ok as long i can talk , he can entertain it's kinda a happy liow.
then went home SS3 went to worms ... SIMON was there haha then went to tea till very late .....

Pass week X D

Aiks working at Uncle Ben there is tired..., last month uncle ben were offer me to help him work on this a week, not much reason why he just want me to help him because i always tell him where is going wrong how would people thinking , well you done a good planning uncle ben you know i sure will accept that offer ... last month went out tea with him . he was offering me a sum of money and a phone, but i rejected i feel that phone for me is useless , i got my pda , i can check online also no need to buy me another phone, then later on i talk to him on the phone he ask me about my fee for next sem , and i was stressing for that ..then uncle ben quickly change the offer to something that i can't rejected him , he giving me a sponcer of 1 Asus mother board and 1 Asus Graphic card, for the week i help him to work .. i can't find ways to reject and this time the job works is more easy but more time ... no need go outstation but need to stay quite sometime in office to do some paper works and sale analysis , my whole week was a tired week , it was like wake up > work > eat > count> happy hours> tea> sleep > and all over again and again.

TAI DELAY ME !!!!
one night tai can't finish his work ask me to help him and he need to show to uncle jimmy by tomorrow morning so aiks help him den , wah lau tai next time you better arrange the file 1st leh
little brother here very tired leh , arrange also time leh... you work longer then me you should know which way is faster what... why want to make a mess , you must not having a timetabble ...
don't tell me no time leh , you can arrange your timetabble when you having happy hours leh.NO comment ... now you owe me 1 wuahahahah.

The days we went to the curve for dinner
wao @@ 10 something reach there , i was thinking what on earth this time got things to eat wor...uncle bring us go eat i Italian restaurants , uncle jimmy tai and me 4 people .. talking crap on the tabble , i have no idea what to call so wait uncles called.. uncle ben this time so pandai no ask me want eat what haha so i no need think , very funny leh they come with breads and dips with olive oil + viniger ... wow but taste 1derfull...those food on tabble i also don't know what is that ... eat only la haha. later on went to some bar for happy hours.... UNCLES LIFE !!!! 

Serious tired saturday was my half rest days, i came back at 1oc haven get lunch , later then pet bro called for help , he can't find the shop... was planning to get a nap , but he called so help. later on i call zhengkai for tea+ lunch it's his birthdays so gona make this diam diam haha , no present for you la zhengkai but take you out tea can la. Night time went to tbun look for on9 games friends due to 9 something got car gathering so , pass by meet old friends, wei chen called sudelly wow ask me where am i and ask me for tea , ok fine 8 oc he reach here and i said bye bye to my friends in the cafe then heading to the curve .. i though he said tea , siong chey he want to buy pants... ha !!! jar 2 no comment then 9 something he send me back to aman suria here to get my car, then he follow me to the car club also , wei chern arr you very slow la like that also can miss us ...no comment lo tea until 1 something all chiao liow then went LDP for tour haha ... then go home sleep .............................. nth much for sunday go cafe play for awhile then go dinner and tea with poan st and Ndrew then went home sleep .. 2morrow is a another working days....
counting down for 2 more days !!!!... yeah....

I learns something cool Uncle Ivan thought me
IF           A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
THEN    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

let's see  for this "LOVE" "FAMILY" "WOMEN" "MONEY" "HARDWORK"  and what else you can think of?
let me tell you LOVE is only 12+15+22+5 = 54%
                          FAMILY is only 6+1+13+9+12+25 = 66%
                          WOMEN is only 20+15+13+5+1+14 = 67%
                          MONEY is only 13+15+14+7+25 = 74%
                          HARDWORK is only 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

ermm What makes 100%?
do you really want to know what in life really makes 100%?
let me tell you this ....
A+1
T+20
T+20
I+9
T+20
U+21
D+4
E+5
Total? what thats?
it's attitude , it worth 100%
count it yourself if you don't believe .                          

Some of the spect that i'm going to get

AMDX4 Phenom 

Mobo Asus M3N-HT Deluxe/Mempipe RM930
Processor AM2+ X4 9950 RM 770
RAM Corsair XMS28500C5DF D2 (TWIN2X2048-6400C5DHX) RM 330
PCI-E Asus EN9600GT BLACK PEARL/HTDI/512M RM520
HDD 500GB SEAGATE 32M RM250
CASING COOLER MASTER CM 690 RM289
PSU COOLER MASTER 500w RM200
kEYBOARD AND MOUSE COMBO LOGITECH G1 DESTOP GAMING RM 89
BURNER PIONEER 20x DVD BURNER RM94
DVD-ROM COMBO SAMSUNG RM 60
LCD ASUS HDMI (WIDE) RM 900

Mobo Asus M3N-HD/HDMI RM590
Processor AM2+ X4 9750 RM 660
RAM Corsair XMS28500C5DF D2 (TWIN2X2048-6400C5DHX) RM 330
PCI-E 9600GT DX10 512-D3 RM500
HDD 500GB SEAGATE 32M RM250
CASING COOLER MASTER CM 690 RM289
PSU COOLER MASTER 500w RM200
kEYBOARD AND MOUSE COMBO LOGITECH G1 DESTOP GAMING RM 89
BURNER PIONEER 20x DVD BURNER RM94
DVD-ROM COMBO SAMSUNG RM 60
LCD ASUS HDMI  RM 900


Mobo Asus M3A78-EMHI RM 295
Processor AM2+ X4 9750 RM 660
RAM Corsair XMS28500C5DF D2 (TWIN2X2048-6400C5DHX) RM 330
PCI-E 9600GT DX10 512-D3 RM500
HDD 500GB SEAGATE 32M RM250
CASING COOLER MASTER CM 690 RM289
PSU COOLER MASTER 500w RM200
kEYBOARD AND MOUSE COMBO LOGITECH G1 DESTOP GAMING RM 89
BURNER PIONEER 20x DVD BURNER RM94
DVD-ROM COMBO SAMSUNG RM 60
LCD ASUS HDMI (WIDE) RM 900

Intel

Mobo Asus P5N-T DLX RM950
Processor C2Q Q9300 2.50 RM885
RAM Corsair XMS28500C5DF D2 (TWIN2X2048-6400C5DHX) RM 330
PCI-E Asus EN9600GT BLACK PEARL/HTDI/512M RM520
HDD 500GB SEAGATE 32M RM250
CASING COOLER MASTER CM 690 RM289
PSU COOLER MASTER 500w RM200
kEYBOARD AND MOUSE COMBO LOGITECH G1 DESTOP GAMING RM 89
BURNER PIONEER 20x DVD BURNER RM94
DVD-ROM COMBO SAMSUNG RM 60
LCD ASUS HDMI (WIDE) RM 900

Mobo Asus P5N-D RM500
Processor C2Q Q6600 2.40 RM625
RAM Corsair XMS28500C5DF D2 (TWIN2X2048-6400C5DHX) RM 330
PCI-E Asus EN9600GT BLACK PEARL/HTDI/512M RM520
HDD 500GB SEAGATE 32M RM250
CASING COOLER MASTER CM 690 RM289
PSU COOLER MASTER 500w RM200
kEYBOARD AND MOUSE COMBO LOGITECH G1 DESTOP GAMING RM 89
BURNER PIONEER 20x DVD BURNER RM94
DVD-ROM COMBO SAMSUNG RM 60
LCD ASUS HDMI (WIDE) RM 900

Mobo Asus P5QL PRO RM380
Processor C2Q Q6600 2.40 RM625
RAM Corsair XMS28500C5DF D2 (TWIN2X2048-6400C5DHX) RM 330
PCI-E Asus EN9600GT BLACK PEARL/HTDI/512M RM520
HDD 500GB SEAGATE 32M RM250
CASING COOLER MASTER CM 690 RM289
PSU COOLER MASTER 500w RM200
kEYBOARD AND MOUSE COMBO LOGITECH G1 DESTOP GAMING RM 89
BURNER PIONEER 20x DVD BURNER RM94
DVD-ROM COMBO SAMSUNG RM 60
LCD ASUS HDMI (WIDE) RM 900

This is some of the spect...
I my self is getting AMD for sure 
reason CHEAPER AND BETTER X D
AMD HAD THE 1st Quard Core 1st later ony Intel do experiment on it ....
and AMD nowadays are stable ...

I get support from uncle that is 
ASUS MOBO + PROCESSOR+AGP , almost half of the things get sponcer so i can buy other stuff like more fan, alumium case , but uncle tell me don't buy other parts 1st because maybe he got lubang to help me get other stuff but sure i need to paid for that.

Was very greedy , wanted a 8GB ram using 64bit to process haha but, well i'm not that crazy , i want to play games also so , 4gb for me is ok . so i did not buy any parts 1st wait end of the month maybe price drop more cheaper !!! haha X D.

awaiting it...

i have ask my self what did i done for the week in penang i was thinking what makes people said that words.. i have no idea , i went for looking for the answer , and i learn much things that old uncles told me , it's what you want , why not give what they want. i should understand it early , if not uncle Ben won't tell me such things and now i understand , he offer me a job again and i shall be busy right now ... can't really get on9 and talk to some of my friends , some of them might be busy at their job , so i would not call them up.

Uncle Ben conversation ...
sam you back?
yup so why you send me to penang and support me to go there?
you better walk a way from what i told you , sam sometimes you know where's your limits.
i don't know my limits!
well you should know, sometimes why want to argue?
I'm sorry uncle Ben i think , maybe that day i'm out of mood at penang after you called me up.
Could you tell me why ? it's your father ? or other things?
It's my brother , he suddenly ask for the insurance things ..is not i don't want to help.
Then ?
well i really did not care about it at first because , bro pass to sister and ivan do it and you know what happend ... an argument on that night sister and ivan were argue for the credits card and brother insurance why would my bro called back every time is a argument?i don't understand uncle Ben ... my mood were serious down.
so how ? still thinking about that? i told you sometimes don't put a blame on other people , you might make other people misunderstand.
well i know ... but just sorry that night you called me . i actually talking to you at outside of the house and i don't want to hear argument sound.I don't know how to tell people about the situations but i don't know how to control my self for that .
so what you situations now? still angry ? or you need more time to chill?
i'm ok now after next days i wake up i saw sister and ivan were talking , i guess is ok. i just angry that i made one of my friends misunderstood. maybe it's my wrong , but it's too late . it been 2 days he's not on9 so i guess he is busy or what else ....
Sam , do you mind uncle Ben tell you somethings? sometimes is not about winning , it's about understanding , you be the winner and who could understand the looser mind? no one would know.
ok give me time to understand ok , i'm kinda tired nowadays , go to factory and mum will not be home for few days.
you need time to think and have enough sleep. well i'm not try to pretend to understand you , you should know why people worry about you, being a hard rock doesn't means everything s , you some how need to be soft on something else. hope you understand.

i'm tired , after coming back from penang i went to factory help , working on the 1st days was numbs but i just don't want to face the computer too much .there is misunderstood between a relationship but never mind , the more i explain were more misunderstood will create ..
but thanks you Uncle Ben you understand me , sorry for argue with you that day don't mean that i somehow i hope people are in front of my eye and they can see what is happening in my eye and they would understand it inc by inc .

i really thank you Uncle Ben,
you really though me something,
and make me understand something,
but lucky you are the person that understand my situations ,
maybe sometimes what happened i just told you on the phone,
you know why would i said that sometimes,
but if that day you din make that called i would not know how am i going to stay at the situation.
sometimes having a friendship with you were like worker and boss,
but as days goes things just change,
maybe that time you shout at me , i would just walk aways and not tell you anythings about it.
if i just did that today the one who is calling might not be you.
you ask me and i answer you.
and from that day on things just change.
todays i trow back the same things like what you did before ,
you were ok and chill on the phone thanks for that ....
for my pet brother i really no idea since days he's not on9 and not getting any msg from him i guess he start to ignore me or maybe he 's busy on his work.... well 1st i don't know how to explain about it and i'm just sorry for that , sometimes over heated are not a good things , why would it happened , lets think back , but what done is done. there will not have another understand of that.

sorry for what i did
really sorry ,
there is nothings to explain anymore
what done is done...
i hope someone tell me why when where ...
just a words of sorry i only can said that .
accept or not accept is no longer an answer.

if there is a tittle what could you put this as?

I'm tired of being what you want me to be
feeling so faithless
lost under the surface
I don't know what you're expecting of me
puting me under the pressure
every step that I take is another mistake to you
I've become so empty
I can't feel it any more
I've become so tired
so much more aware
I'm becoming this
all I want to do
is be more like me
and be less like you.
can't you see that you're smothering me
holding too tightly
afraid to lose control
cause everything that you thought I would be
is falling apart right in front of you.
and I know
i may end up failing too
but I know
you were just like me
with someone disappointed in you.

Walk to my balcony have a sit,
thinking what could posible happend,
think and think .
can't figure out what went wrong,
but understand the limit of it,
i saw the sea infront of me,
i saw the people playing around,
i hear the song of freedom.
and the sand was soaking my toes,
the sea water was covers my toes.
i stood there for an hour ,
things doens't come but kept waiting.
the world is a big circles ,
but sometimes big circles are small.
don't expect it's big,
it's not so big lately.
when you notice it ,
it been flew always with the wind.
what have you done lately?

Are you expecting something to happend?
things has show up so,
what's bother you.
a little bit of fate and faith.

My Life Is Changing Before Me &.. 
Things I Felt I No Longer Feel 
All My Beliefs Have Turned To Nothingness 
All That Remains Is This Bleak Emptiness 

No - What Has Happened To Me 
Everything That I Was - Now I Can't Even See 
As The Changes Destroy My Mind 
Life Is Passing Before My Eyes 

Things Weren't This Way, I Once Was Strong 
But Now I'm Weak, Can't Carry On 
Crushed By Everything That Made This 
I Can No Longer Take This 

No - What Has Happened To Me 
Everything That I Was - Now I Can't Even See 
As The Changes Destroy My Mind 
Life Is Passing Before My Eyes 

Alone In Anguish, Cast In Silence 
Feelings Of Hatred, Masked Thru Violence 
Frustrations Overwhelming-Endless Misery 
Caged Emotions - Tears Apart Me 

Look Beyond My Inner Self 
Past My Soul Into Hell 
See The Things That Made My Life 
Feel The Pain As I Die 

Quickly, My Life Did Change 
Nevermore Shall I Feel Sane 
Waiting, To End This Life 
Waiting I Take This Knife 

Quickly, My Life Is Fading 
Nevermore Shall I Feel Pain 
My Life Has Passed Before Me 
An Ending That I Shall Not See

I'll Take You to Heaven, the Kingdom is Yours 
Deny Your own Life, Submit to the Cause 
Change Your Beliefs to fit in With Mine 
Grant me Your Soul Till the end of Time" 

Given a Chance to Repent for his Sins 
Delusions of Grandeur, Enrobed by Hymns 
Nothing but Silence Comes From his Lord 
Nothing but Hatred Becomes his Accord 

Forsaken by God, Nailed to the Cross 
The People Don t Care, No Great Loss 
Rejected by People he was Trying to Save 
Nailed up - Between two Knaves

You thought we'd be fine
All these years gone by
Now your askin me to listen
Well then tell me about everything
No lies we're loosin time

Cause this is a battle
And its your final last call
It was a trial, you made a mistake, we know
But why arent you sorry, why arent you sorry, why?
This can be better, you used to be happy

You've got them on your side
And they wont change their minds
Now its over
And im feelin like we've missed out on everything
I just hope its worth the fight

I want a box around myself
So they can put me on the shelf
To see the way I live
But the holes are blocked
By everybody else inside
As far as I can tell
They're all living well
Living better, still
Oh, that's the way it is
Climbing up the corporate ladder
Trying to escape through the roof

Can you explain lives led in vain?
It seems like everybody's looking for their way out

It's not a problem, it's hell
We only do what people tell
But can you tell me, anyone
The consequences of setting someone free?

Have you ever felt the pinch
When you life's confined?
Well, get your ass in line
It's hard not to care what they say
I'd like to think we'll break away
I don't believe that growing up
Means cashing out and giving up

The time has come to deny your ways.
To rid ourselves of the parasites.
Shedding dead weight, reclaiming what?s ours.
Taking each moment with force again.
No crosses to bear, no time to be wasted.
A fearless approach to oppression.
A constant attack to never retreat from.
With no other choice but resistance,
What will it take
You must choose or be chosen for.
What will it take
Choose or chosen

Its all that we ask, for what we demand.
The decisions we make we will live by.
Proving your weakness.
Denouncing your claims
Your feeble attempts to demean us.
What more can you do, you?re against the wall.
Your lies will be heard for the last time.
Sat what you will it?s only in vein.
This is the justice I fought to attain.

.................................................

A suddenly suprize that went up to penang. An aeroline ticket life

this is the bus that i went to travel to penang , dad told me after my trip from melacca, >eh if you want go to penang or where else let me know ok. I ask i though you heading outstation?.No. no comment about that i tell all my friends that i would be around here but seem everyone is buzy rather i go some place that is everyone free... 

i start my trips at wednesdays , morning and this ticket actuly was bought early in the morning uncle ben ring me up and send me to oneU there . before that night i went out with my pet brother and when i reach home and i went out again. 

at first i told uncle that i feeling strange around me, sometimes people like don't  trust me and they don't dare to side bet with me , come on since you doens't believe sidebet please maybe i'm telling you lies , but most of the time i did not . some people said you sure? maybe? ermm let me think about it , leave me a space i might be there ,....etc .you know what uncle ben done this to me , he said ok i buy you a ticket by tomorrow morning make sure you pack you bags tonight. well ok since my dad give me green light to go travel ok go . i went home , pack my bags .. and went for a few hours sleep , then my phone ring suprize that the time is 8oc and i still wondering ... ok ok take a bath and i go.. i was thinking i haven get my bus ticket how am i going to travel at first i though uncle ben was joking so i preten ... when he reach my house , i put all my things and said greed my mum and dad here i go, and i put my stuff to his car suprize that ...he give me the a4 paper that is above printed out ,i see the time booked 8 30 ... he reach my house around  9 30. Reach oneU around 10 he talk and he chat slow with me in the car, thanks for the things that you said and the bus ticket, i call my sister and let her know that i'm going up there .

In the bus ...
aeroline a 1st class bus ... wao ... uncle you really want me to enjoy this trip yeah... i saw many funy people there have no idea what i'm feeling , just feel diffrent when i'm on board. maybe many business people on the bus or maybe uncle want me to see something in the bus. and start my jurney and reach penang around 3 30

My sister fetch me at Sg.nipon station near bayang lepas.. but this time my sister is fetching few uncles with i don't know some of them, there are uncle peter , uncle koike and auntie koike. suprice the that i know this japaniese uncle quite cute lo and me question , he's good in english , then went to tea nearby nowhere i also don't know where ....

went back to feringgi height , all those uncle stay in the same area but diffrent floors .. cool eh this kind of uncle no need work @@ suprize that what they working as and how thier income come from , they seem have normal life but the have rich man knoledge, so i just chit chat as what i use to be.

Dinner time for the 1st night
Went to uncle peter house for dinner , nothing much normal home dishies . went home and start to watch movie till next morning .... around 7 oc in the morning only start to sleep.before i go out my pet brother msg me , he ask me for dinner and i just forget to send him a msg i guess ... was rushing out and did not take my phone with me ... till i check send box there is no msg send out ... so aiks don't know how to explaint and don't feel like explainting it so i just leave it there.

when i wake up is around 4 oc , i start to watch movie again last night haven finish haha that movie very nice called "catch me now" but i don't really like the ending  no comment. watch till half around 6 oc like that sister called go out eat dinner with those uncle ... owh okie thne went to bath ... aiks.. i'm the drive there ... ok lo i drive lo haha since so long din touch this car , reach there around 7 lo .. when all people reach  @@ all retired uncle ... fulaueh 1st time meet too much old uncle haha .. ok la chating with them , those uncle so sui bluff me ... they said son want some chinese tea ... ok lo i really thoght the fill in the bottle was chinese tea... few cm of it and uncle add ice for me i suprize that and i think again it doens't look like CHINESE TEA... siong chey again ... is liqour jar 2 no hope drink 1 cup then went shoping uncle koike and his wife and peter wife and my sister was in the car then we went to shoping lo.... not much walk walk see see bought things lo .....

the wired night ....
i was on the phone with uncle ben and my pet brother pull me in a converstation and i told him that i will be right back because i'm talking with him... when i finish talk i msg back ,... same old things happend ..fedup... don't care go sleep...

On the phone
uncle was telling me why aeroline, and ask how i feel and many things more , told him and i ask him why , he ask do you know what is your class now? do you see why people like aeroline so much? and you know why some sits are empty? and do you sit or sleep on thier sofa bed at lower deck? I answer him all that , then he said well you know what you looking for so how is your trip to penang ? actuly is good things to stay at here chilling and talk to those no need work uncle , quite of joy and happy . here all the neighbour always exchange food ... koike wife is a good baker haha i get pizza for my supper and banana cakes .

sometimes i don't know how to show people the real situation , but if i dare them they will just suck out , so i'm kind living like a lie man life ... don't care , if really want to blame , blame me it's my fault , i did not check it and i din reply . . so don't bother to ask , uncle ben told me see now you know the situation , sometime people don't believe you evendo it's true ...is not you don't want to explaint to them is they might thinkgs other ways ... so now you understand? ok ok i get the catch but what the point............................................

Today i heard and i feel it's me correct me if that is not me.

Today i knwo somethings new >guess what it is jelous<
i just so want to know what is all about, have no idea sometimes...but todays someone tog me that jelous , and i found out people are trying to tell me something but not in the direct way i know what is going on , No need to tell me , i have once tell that i jelous about it , and just once it become forever , this situations remind me that this kind of people doens't actuly know how other people feel,they always thinks in thier own ways , they just follow thier heart and they did not really see what is all about it.If you want to confess somethings to me mind as well tell me.and better you ask me .

A big round or meaning
pass days one of my friends laptop has problem after i use it ,and guess what i hear it from today it's a so direct story from it, he said the other person live in my friends house is a jelousy person,and this person is ruining my friends laptop , he state a very long story and i get it , sound more like me , he said that the person did it in purpose , and few times before i use my friends laptop after leaving sure got problems. It me heading a bad luck, or what? someone is blaming? well saying things that no body know is true but to trust. Today i get the meaning of it , the feeling of mine way like keep it aways and you are not really welcome , but it's true? who's know? rather geting some profits are better then screw up.

Another meaning
someone said that how rich is rich? do you think is rich? 
I define rich people as in you drove many diffrent luxury car , what you wear , how you talk , which culture you love the most , what are you always compare with ,things that you no need to plan , scare of people to know about your salary , using own experience to talk, always think that people around you are geting profits from you, they always buy things that is very unique,to have own style in certain ways .It's easy to see a person status just like that.

I share this statement for a reason, sometimes people just scare of fake people around especially those rich people , well if that so there is always limited time for a relationship , after a long time you just started people are geting profits from you, if that so what for we wasted so much time just want to get those profits ? Do they really understand about it?when things get close they started to thinks other things , yes maybe sometimes is right , that is just keep happend and happened ......

Am i jelous?
Yes i'm jelous about my brother , why he get those freaking good deal with my dad , that what i jelous about it.my pet bro said that i see what people get then i want what people have, huh true eh? no idea .. how well is knowing my self and how well do you really know your self?since  that happend no comment for that if people said so then so , why want to change thier mind when they always said yes, wasted of time to make them understand it.

Uncle ben said if a person you already know he/she can't play with jokes, why still play with them, actuly i don't get when i 1st listen and i always ask, he said you will met one of them one day, guess i met one , things really suck out badly !!! what you joke around they definely using it and do on you , and they will over done it sometimes, we jokes has a limited range , but if you over the range i guess it's a time for argument again and again.

what you said before has consequence , why it's a post with a long story , how am i going to understand it , this may cause how you talk normally , if want to tell somethings that is me , no need make a big round and a long story , and i'm not stupid to hear that story. A company can't even get a good computer spect and telling me that they are spare parts? wounder it's my wrong guess ... but the words is all sharpen so i would claim that is all to me.

If i'm looking for profits , better i don't care about it

Friendship with this kind of supicious , i give up

Friendship that is full of problem , i give up

Friendship that is between another relationship , i give up

Friendship that is always doubble side meaning , i give up

Friendship that hurt my feeling , i give up

This statement is what i thinking right now, If i'm what those people think then make it be.
I'm leaving in the zone of mine, heading to a place to jump with the sea.
hope no one know what am i now....

It's about thinking !!! malaysian don't think before talk trust me !!! they don't!!!

it been awhile i'm not around thinking and figuring what is life all about ...
do you believe people that said No i din actuly they did .
no comment , how i know and how i get the info is what i saw and hear from my own ears and eyes,  sometimes i would preten that i did not saw or hear that but they just kept talk and talk about it ... if that is a good point of that you all won't spend time to talk about it , if there is a bad things you would exchange and started to compare with who and who... i'm not confessing something but at least i know people that said no infront of me they know who are they ... and how i get the the news it doens't matter ... when you start to talk about it people would know about it , that is so simple but who'S know? 

I been walking and think for the last night i was siting down chilling with friends ... things are just get chill out , hope that it could happend. 

Yesterdays people said that you are a rubbish , but the rubbish has been use by the one who said it and now it's recycling , i don't mind it anymore....
they said NO this is bad and it's not helping but they end up with the YES and changing thier words ... i would just hope that sometimes i could record down and play back things that people said . but this will make more problem , so friends of mine said don't care about it , if it's bottering you , better you give up .

someone said sam today i don't get the catch what are you trying to said, days later... fuck you sam i know what you mean now , it been so long and you take back out and said . few more days later sam i think that sometimes if we don't clean things off  and end it , we would just end up argument.

Thanks god at least someone know what's going on !!!!
so glad that they know somethings i want to tell them , if problem stucked , we escape all things just end up a mess and it won't be a solid relationship.

MY NEW STATEMENT 
in my survey i found out that malaysian are follow the trent , Let me show you how does this work, it's actuly like this i asked IF 10 PEOPLE SAID THIS IS GOOD WOULD IT BE GOOD?
yer it's so damn obvious ...don't ask stupid question can anot ? they said to me.
But when i met Outsider people and ask, i was suprize that they give me some answer that i did not expected, i asked the same question and the reply was erm 10 people ? who are they ?
what is the age of them? would  you tell me what are they looking good at? i did no prepair for that but i manage to let them know what i want do about my statement. some of them said If a 10 person agree it might be somethings same with thier mind , but this could never happend , what if the 10 person is retarded ? so could that gossip be true? or the things are good? a perfect 10 doesnt't means it's perfect it means that is a problem . this are those people giving me answer and ask me back question i was happy that.

I ask why every sentance and they explaint i was so fucking high you know , i ask why could it never happend? they said there are many people in the world , if you have the same mind i guess today we should not have class for living right.wow i was so damn agree with the answer !!!!

but what makes me down was all my friends are juging me , they thought i'm playful some of my question was stupid , they just din think and give me the answer, the moment i hear it was damn i hope i was serious all the time but it's too late , nevermind if 10 malaysian said that is a good work means it's really good work in malaysia. so my conclusion was if i can just convienc 100 people in malaysia my plan would work just like that , since they had no question and they always things they are smart then other.

I realize that most of use give the answer without thinking most of the people said they think before said but i see and i observe that later on they would just screw thier ass just like a bomb creator that create the most best explosive bomb but they plan it on thier ass and they would know what happend in the end. So i'll be smilling agin... i'm correct but who can i share with it's my blog and my diary. don't you get what it really means?

People said they think before answer, 

actuly they did not think before,

if 10 people would said yes will it be a yes to you?

they said they understand ,

but they don't understand at all but they just to get back thier pride

if your pride is more important ,

then what is not important for you personality?

some said what the fuck you talking why sudelly personality?

see see i know i know they did not ask and give me wtf angain and again ..

my statement was writen on saturday and i start to ask around ,

see see see i get the answer,

They just give me diffrent answer ....and they said it the statement said that the 10 person is YES

IF YES WHY DIFFRENT ANSWER AFTER FEW QUESTION?

Huh HUh ... no comment and i just got the malaysian mind concept and i think it would works .
i'm lazy to see and ask again they ask me to ask other question but i guess 2 statement i already stop, my statement was a 11 question , and they answer 2 question and give me some wired facial expression.

GAME OVER?

This few days i just finish my finals , but it seem bored after my timetabble was spoiled...so bored and it's going more bored ever ...nothing much happend todays... went out for tea with friends and went to cafe to pass my time... night time went out with barca , he asked me for dinner at paramount , then he change to murni and i ask who's going WOC 2nd leader was going i was like so pai seh weh... not much it's just a car club but my car was stocked so haha abit pai seh la just went tea with them quite friendly , then went back home.... storing .... 

What i saw this few days...
I saw many of my friends blogs are having a GAME OVER TITTLE ...some is about relationship some are study some are even thier car...ok , les start with relationship ... some of my friends they just sold out thier relationship examples they said they had enought of that , she said "your one time enjoyment made my life forgive-ness and i can't forget it " wao she is in deep shit ... but i din ask her why , because i know what it means..., i hope she is ok with that i really want to help but seem i can't said much things in this kind of situations, so i just drop her a msg . The others with relationship some of the words i qoute it like >

"Sometimes i don't call i don't msg i don't what ever doens't means i don't care about you" 
"I hope you understand me , but it's too late and it's no meaning to let you know"
"I'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry you saw what i did and you keep quite you gave me another chance but i screw up again and again I'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry"
"I love you but would you love me, i don't know would you tell me?"

Those are some post that they made i was passing by thier blog and i feel that wao the problems start at THERE @@ i see it ... but how could i just said it like that?can't help just keep quite...

2nd Game Over 
it's one of my friends  car been crashed and it's a total lost he said that everythings has an end and the end was GAME OVER...
his qoute>

"I wish that day i could die with it, so i would not keep thinking and thinking"
"I hope that night was a dream , but when i was awake i was sleeping on bed with bandage"
"They din screw me up and they caring for me when i still not awake"
"I Thought dying with it was my perfect answer but when i saw they were caring about me , i did not want the wish come trues"
"And the game is over now "

I called him up and ask how are him now he was totally zero !!!
he seem lost , but i just ask about how is him and i did not menction about the things i read in his blog... well seem he has no mood to talk so i end it with silent bye.

Dennis...
well well well dennis you car seem parked at the same place every morning , you din go to college any more or you having sem break?
No , i'm ending my studies ...
why bro ? what happend?
i can't really study and i give up...
what's your problem?so did you father know?
of cus not , i still thinking how to tell him .
This is not a solution Dennis...

that day i ask Dennis you tell me that you are bored with everydays , those days you at the cafe playing DOTA was it happy?you told me that i won a few games but i feel bored don't know why, and he ask me why life are so boring.I told him the worlds is not boring they are things to let you explore but you din think about it , you said playing DOTA are so bored but you been playing and playing for years everydays every morning you were the 1st customer here, and you said you have a bored life come on you lead your self the road and you finally said it's bored ... funny things that he ask aiks sam what do you do at the boring days ... i told him , i got my timetabble why i got my timetabble because it's a time frame to let you know what to do when you have nothings to do . he keep quite and send me home .... blah blah...

he said my life is serious GAMING OVER.... come on you still young la bro... no comment on him .

this are the few things i saw and i listen from what people said... no harm and i get some feed back cool or not cool it depance on you.

after tea with barca .... my phone rang .... guess who unlce ben ....
on the way to his house ...auntie not in went outstation ...no1der call me la.... aiks at his house beer with him few cups i cabut lari ... i dowant to drink so much talk with him then he like drunk drunk de so i sendiri buka pintu cabut ... haha sumore i seldom drink so must know my limits haha then went back home feel tired at first but when i reach home want to sleep then can't aiks don't care la watch movie la ... then slap .... wake up and continew write blog haha X D.

huh?

This few days i just finish my finals , but it seem bored after my timetabble was spoiled...so bored and it's going more bored ever ...nothing much happend todays... went out for tea with friends and went to cafe to pass my time... night time went out with barca , he asked me for dinner at paramount , then he change to murni and i ask who's going WOC 2nd leader was going i was like so pai seh weh... not much it's just a car club but my car was stocked so haha abit pai seh la just went tea with them quite friendly , then went back home.... storing .... 

What i saw this few days...
I saw many of my friends blogs are having a GAME OVER TITTLE ...some is about relationship some are study some are even thier car...ok , les start with relationship ... some of my friends they just sold out thier relationship examples they said they had enought of that , she said "your one time enjoyment made my life forgive-ness and i can't forget it " wao she is in deep shit ... but i din ask her why , because i know what it means..., i hope she is ok with that i really want to help but seem i can't said much things in this kind of situations, so i just drop her a msg . The others with relationship some of the words i qoute it like >

"Sometimes i don't call i don't msg i don't what ever doens't means i don't care about you" 
"I hope you understand me , but it's too late and it's no meaning to let you know"
"I'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry you saw what i did and you keep quite you gave me another chance but i screw up again and again I'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry"
"I love you but would you love me, i don't know would you tell me?"

Those are some post that they made i was passing by thier blog and i feel that wao the problems start at THERE @@ i see it ... but how could i just said it like that?can't help just keep quite...

2nd Game Over 
it's one of my friends  car been crashed and it's a total lost he said that everythings has an end and the end was GAME OVER...
his qoute>

"I wish that day i could die with it, so i would not keep thinking and thinking"
"I hope that night was a dream , but when i was awake i was sleeping on bed with bandage"
"They din screw me up and they caring for me when i still not awake"
"I Thought dying with it was my perfect answer but when i saw they were caring about me , i did not want the wish come trues"
"And the game is over now "

I called him up and ask how are him now he was totally zero !!!
he seem lost , but i just ask about how is him and i did not menction about the things i read in his blog... well seem he has no mood to talk so i end it with silent bye.

Dennis...
well well well dennis you car seem parked at the same place every morning , you din go to college any more or you having sem break?
No , i'm ending my studies ...
why bro ? what happend?
i can't really study and i give up...
what's your problem?so did you father know?
of cus not , i still thinking how to tell him .
This is not a solution Dennis...

that day i ask Dennis you tell me that you are bored with everydays , those days you at the cafe playing DOTA was it happy?you told me that i won a few games but i feel bored don't know why, and he ask me why life are so boring.I told him the worlds is not boring they are things to let you explore but you din think about it , you said playing DOTA are so bored but you been playing and playing for years everydays every morning you were the 1st customer here, and you said you have a bored life come on you lead your self the road and you finally said it's bored ... funny things that he ask aiks sam what do you do at the boring days ... i told him , i got my timetabble why i got my timetabble because it's a time frame to let you know what to do when you have nothings to do . he keep quite and send me home .... blah blah...

he said my life is serious GAMING OVER.... come on you still young la bro... no comment on him .

this are the few things i saw and i listen from what people said... no harm and i get some feed back cool or not cool it depance on you.

after tea with barca .... my phone rang .... guess who unlce ben ....
on the way to his house ...auntie not in went outstation ...no1der call me la.... aiks at his house beer with him few cups i cabut lari ... i dowant to drink so much talk with him then he like drunk drunk de so i sendiri buka pintu cabut ... haha sumore i seldom drink so must know my limits haha then went back home feel tired at first but when i reach home want to sleep then can't aiks don't care la watch movie la ... then slap .... wake up and continew write blog haha X D

Can you guys don't feel what you feel? can you all please ask?

Today morning wake up i try to settle down all my things ... i need to come out with a new timetabble due to last week cancel and so goes this week...actuly this week timetabble was after tuesday class pass up the assignment then go home pack bag and go to penang , den reach penang must call uncle ong 1st call him fetch me to sister there wuhaha ...then planed to have dinner with his family ,.. then here goes my holidays at penang ... as i plan , all my friends was asking me why i want to go to penang ... i want to tell sometimes but rather keep it because telling too much were over act.. when i plan all my timetabble and stuff ... then went out to tea with friends and for my lunch . then back home and force to jump and run , suprize that my leg doens't have any pain ,i think this is no wasted while i keep traning and force my self to run, my dad said to me that i'm stupid and the only people that support me are close friends , they give me the answer was when you stop execirce your leg will goes more weak and many things could happend... last time i don't believe this and i thoght was a bull shit but when the incident happend few month ago i started to notice and not to giving up...well back after a long run around my area i went back home , bath and get my dinner then went to rest awhile .... and dad came home he told somethings that i always hate to hear... but i must keep quite ... he said tomorrow need go to sunway shogun to had the company dinner ... aiyooo ... spoil my plan ... can't cancel his one ... aiks .. so need to call up to uncle and tell him i can't attent at the moment and i have no mood to go penang ... so i rather wait next week ... but next week mum and dad are not in so i guess postphone again ...so means = no need go ... then mengz called ... cancel !!! fulamak !!! all cancel ... this time the timetabble is the worst ever !!!!

and you know what happend i get a news from clubs said that brian was hit by a lorry > this is what barca told me >

For your informations that our buddy Brian admited to Glenn Eagle Hospital at Jalan Ampang yesterday evening(should be around 7-8pm).He was been hit by a lorry while he riding his motorcycle.As Brian called me around 12am while i was tt with Candy and Scar at Wangsa Maju.He told me 1 of his shoulder bone is breaked and i think he need to do surgery.So i think we should organise pay a visit to our bro Brian that was suffering in the hospital.

the day that full of suprize ...

Sometimes i learn from people ,
and people said that they learn from me,
and when then said they will said where got,
i also lazy said ,
you all said i action,
ok if i'm ,
why that everytime i call you guys for tea also can't make it?
and this is the first time i cancel the things you said i action,
i been calling and calling you guys but always no ,
when you all call when did i said no expect this time?
if you said you learn from me and give me that kind of facial espression,
i think better i get off since i'm a disturbing you,
You guys need me that time will try msn or called me,
i need you guys that time msn or called also no reply,
and everytime you guys msg me sure got some problem to ask me,
i ask you all that time you all said i disturbing you,
ok now i seldom on msn and you guys said that i block you all come on,
if you care about hotmail why not you ask ?
you guys always think your way ,
there are no reason to do that it's so childish ,
if you said that why not you delete the email that is blocking you?
and stop asking me that why i'm not online,
if you got heart send me a sms or called to ask,
why would you all want to think what yourself is think?
this is so selfish this is not learn from me ,
i did not do that .

THINK if i'm action , then why would you still want to talk to me
THINK do i really do that before?
THINK do you do that before or you just forget?
THINK if i'm that so rather less keep the friendship cold.
better than i hear those sharp words from you guys...

moment at muar.......

afternoon ... was awake sleep at hotel ... Ben thought i'm still sleeping so he did not wake me , i was thinking something and i'm sorry make you wait me wake up... before i was awake i told what happend to some of my friends they said since when you argument with him like arguement with your girlfriends sumore your girlfriends things also don't have so much to hear..., i was thinking that am i really worry about it or i'm over acting? i really don't know , but at least i know it will goes silent on this relationship so well who know what's going to happend next , few days without using internet was like i went to some place that is so quite , Ben was right for my life i addicted to something that is using internet , guess he's correct MSN was a drugs and you just don't notice ... That days they ask me how is going to be and i told them i really don't know and i hope to walk aways for a few days and i went to maur for a trip with Uncle Ben.It's a fate , things are like arrangement , i told about Uncle Ben about that things he said maybe or maybe not , he said sometimes he do believe in horoscrope but not all the time...the last day i'm still at kl i thinking why sudelly arguemnt ? i just can't slove it till i hit the horoscrope button... then i only realize fuck things are crashed no1der it has happend...

After i wake up went to bath , Uncle ben so cialat ... he wake up early but failed to go to bathroom ... give me the excuese is aiyer you sleeping ma later i shower got sound wake up then you can't sleep well haha <~ he said ....so i went to bath 1st then his turn.. then head to nearby and ate breakfast... went to maur HQ to find Dai Lou ... but he is not in then Sai Lou there well have a big hug from him haha almost 4 month never meet him and also call also don't have why haha because when i quit that job that time i trow away the sim card ... 0173896311 <~ i trow away because it's not under my name and i'm done doing that ... no longer touch ... sailou ask eh sui chai why not continew ... Uncle Ben shoot him haha then he keep quite ... so i help uncle check stock as usally but not getting salary la because i just follow him ... but before i go to maur he gave me some money and i expect that is what he expect to give me that amount of money.check stock ... and help abit at the factory then walk here and there find auntie and talk ... she 10 years also no change 1 lo always call me go there ... aiyo i quit jor lo no no go haha she was asking me want to VISIT THE NEW SPA ANOT ...@@ i said no thanks haha....then went to dinner and those stuff lo 1st night nothing happend because need to wait Tailou go Sgpore to get the stock over and sailou told me JB got new stock need somebody to handle ...wow wow that i don't want to care i can help but not touching anythings you guys doing now ok...sailou keep provoke me ... i said no then sudelly Uncle Ben jump out haha sailou you in big troubble wuhahaha uncle help me haha ...and i told uncle ben don't tell me you are waiting for me to help u clean that stock !!! he reply if you don't want then nevermind la give other people do.Is not the sweating and counting problem is the following up problems... after dinner went back hotel sleep Uncle ben went out relax i was thinking and thinking again ... were my questions answered? i guess nope i just taking holidays and wait things cool down...i sleep early because i scare tomorrow late wake up so sleep early ...next morning i wake up around 10 uncle haven sms i think he is still sleeping so i went to bath ... see what you said this time haha ...after finish shower i knocked his door HE MIAed ... guess he's smoking or on phone outside somewhere else ... (he pass me his other phone to use and he said don't give your number to anyone of them, so i said ok)i use His other phone to call Sailou and ask Dailou back mei? he said today afternoon back JB wor you urgent going back kl meh?eerrr no haha. Then uncle ben come in and tell me later we going down JB there check stock and please call Sailou and tell him go with us togather ...then i ask a stupid question who driving ? @@ Uncle ben said stupid sure la sailou then he went to bath... after he habis sailou waiting at the hotel there , ok then i ask tonight we comming back here arrr he said nope but take your back and laptops to sailou car ... pack and run again ...Sailou driving and uncle Ben was keep checking his data in car and i was siting infront ... Uncle ben sms in sudelly , i read he said oie pass me your pouch ... i want the HDD .. i did not react suprize and i turn back and give him , i was half talking with sailou haha so he did not notice ... At JB there wow empty and big space and the tons of tractor were there parking waiting for us to check it.Finally saw Dailou cars his Blue Devil... then park the car and walk yayaya my pouch have get back ... Uncle Ben said no need take pouch the HDD leave in car ... i did not listen and i keep in my pocket.Leaving it in the car is not that save .. so i did not take my pouch and i take the HDD with me ... then Dailou trow me his car key he call me follow sailou go kai kai suprize that he do that ... but i was thinking why uncle ben want to leave the HDD in car and the other laptop in his car? i just don't understand.... as i follow sailou around the tour ... and were looking for food to eat because i'm hungry !!!! haha don't know where leh but got things eat then enought .... after finish eat have a chat with sailou i ask wei wassup la why the system so mah fan zou up and down.... he said ai ya la you know last few week UncleBen got a Faulty stock... now it's at the place that you saw those tractor la .. i said tiu why no tell me early when in the car,he said aiks suichai don't care so much la later my brother and uncle said what we do only Sailou ask eh you got bring laptop mo ?i said no leh at hotel there leh ...he sudelly change ... Oh well nevermind then talk and talk ... few hours leh then uncle msg me oie the HDD in which car? you take out jor? i reply him ya i took out what's going on? then sailou were searching his car , why the HDD sudelly so important ... wah lau eh i also don't know what happend la as long i keep to my self that is ok.. then UncleBen said THANK YOU you save my ass ...no comment no idea also while i driving that time i put the HDD back to my pouch . then went back to the factory there and help uncle count the stock and check no comment see jor also know what happend ... help him count and count .... Dailou Uncleben and few people were in the office light fighting or arugment i saw but i preten nothing happend ... Uncle keep press his laptop and let Dailou see , sailou tell me don't care la count 1st make sure no lost because this dealer quite snake...Our lorry were standby after check the stock all runn away haha like pack and run. night time and i still don't know what is happending ....sailou help us find a nearby hotel around there ... after dinner me and sailou finally saw Dailou and UncleBen those two like keep talking and keep talk loud me and him has no idea what's going on i guess HE know what happend but did not tell me... so went for tea and talk ... PNC stuff OO me also consider the PNC People? haha who cares ... went back and bath and sleep same room with uncle ...den ... you know what happend he call me give him the HDD , i give him lo then he give me see something that i'm not expected that happend , he shows me the graph and other things and some conversation on the phone while he talking with other boss finally i know what happend spending few hours to understand that stuff and at last i know what's is going on .... Morning liow guess what stupid uncle did not wake me up and sailou were in the room wahlau eh meh lei geh !!!!!! uncle left me msg said that he got something do with Dailou ... then i expect he will be back soon gua ... sailou said eh later we go happy lo ... walk walk see see go singk then shoping ... dinner and went back hotel as i were almost asleep stupid uncle drunked and land on my bed so i change bed ... no comment ..... the final morning i sit sailou car and uncle were in dailou car speeding back to maur HQ ... but today sunday no people at office why go back office? ... so sien leh i have no idea what going on and i'm not helping much ...Uncle told me he said eh you see that day i office there with those snakes you saw hat happening ?....told me and make me understand... stupid sailou give me wrong infomation is not uncle get the faulty stock la is all those boss too pandai masuk too much no money paid uncle and dailou ... the things that are in my HDD were the converstation and the proof of them ...NO1DER everyone were so worry about the laptop and they tog all the data at the laptop!!!! chey.... time pass .... and Uncle said going back soon so i guess ok haha nothing is left on me here ... but i still need go down Sgpore to get those things ... hope the custome din see !!! X D...he send me home and had dinner with him ...This is why i don't want to work there ... life always in risk don't know what happend !! then what they said may have changes .. uncle teach me next time do business you use brain when meet this kind of snake... OO some of my friends thought i block them on msn, i early said i won't block a person well if he/she can't get i'll just leave there why care when no body are caring ...i found out that few of my friends said SAMSON Silent At Mana?Sini Only Nice!! what the heck ... lazy to reply them la sometime what they think is what they feel they feel people block them for bosong them or what reason who cares since you can't see what you want to see ...does it really matter?Uncle got tell me so you care about it or what ? i told him that i should not care because sometimes people can't accept the facts ... and they keep change what they said ...SILENT talk ...PWC people find me for tea ... ok la i went to find them tea ... X D...

I don't know how it happends

I don't know why would you all said i avoiding

I don't know why they think funny things

I just don't know .... maybe i'm wrong ,

if i'm wrong i said sorry more then you think,

if it's not my wrong then who could i blame?

.......

Thank You for the trip and the money you gave 

i'll use it in a good way 

thanks for everythings and make me understand , 

you just show me how human are look like and what they could think when they saw a diffrents

THINGS JUST CHANGE DON'T EXPECT THEY WON'T

MY Friendster picture said it all , and it's really true

and i understand it why it could happend and why i should know

thanks for giving me a million dollar lesson 

Hope you get a new life soon X D

So i can be GOD BROTHER haha 

Comming up plans need go to penang and going down to sgporeto visit charles

my buddy and going to visit his new house soon 

see you there bro...

saturday night X D

went out with them X D

they also went to karat highway X D

quite nice to know them .....

i found this song quite nice X D when i was in uncle car X D

long long time ago !!!!!

I have a  frineds name call Benson , i use to called him Ben aka Uncle ben, he's a cool middle age guys that have married but no kids , he told me that about life , i really appreciate and he told me something that i disagree since last last time ago but today is a answer for me to said i'm wrong,well what you know i arrange my timetabble for next week going down actuly but it seem some urgent so i need go met auntie have no idea , i ask Ben he said he don't know , so ask me go down and talk to auntie , aiks i have to go. todays he told me that and he is going down with me so i guess is ok "I THOUGH IS FRIDAY AFTERNOON GO" HE SAID NOW WTF ... ok lo go home pack.. then go go go haha go outstation loooo.... haha reach here de then i blog.

Uncle ben find me around 12 i guess have a talk and chat ..., so happy to see him but got scold hahahe said "sui chai mising arr i called tai find you he got call you or sms u mo?" i told him got ... den ask why mia ... i said because you la call me work with you ... i don't want! reason i scare i need to follow up ... he said arr ok la ok la can follow me go down muar? i said can la go how many days?he said few days lo.. erm i said ok ok lo he said i thought you go assignment ? i told him i finish de  and you are so lucky since my pet brother don't know can go melacca anot so i rearrange my timetable and i got free time on this few days ... woo so glad can go down muar can meet up the gang..can see Dai Lou  Sai Lou haha X D i'm save at muar no need care, am i'm glad to go down there because my dream car haha can test drive .. Dai lou sure borrow me 1 X D soo thumb ups!!!! the last time i drive that car was 6 or 7 months ago X D... need meet him soon because they need to talk about something so i follow along hehe. I guess when they talk Sai Lou will bring me tour tour... test drive haha .

Just i finish pack my bag Uncle Ben give me MONEY  to use i ask why give me so much... he said give you use because he said i poor this few week , Woi i admin that i poor last few week la .i said don'y want and he scold me again, i said you have no intenction to scold me what Y.Y me don't want la , he said TAKE IF YOU TREAT ME AS YOUR UNCLE. Ok la OK La Y.Y take la take la.den uncle Ben told me the plan de reach here morning then sleep 1st tomorrow afternoon only go do the things...Uncle Ben bring 2 Laptop.. like serious he call me keep one of this laptop in my backpack incase something happend... so on the way i transfer all the file into my hdd and thumbs drive ... before somethings happend...no1der look for me so urgent ... i think he need to show Dai Lou for that ... don't know leh macam funny .... i macam naik kereta .. he said don't transfer those file on house pc because got internet not save ... i was thinking who so free want to tab you computer leh ... he said play safe can anot !!can is can la why made until yor i don't know how to said...i think again yerr macam cabut diri geh ... like those illegal things but it's not haha.

Nobody knows who I really am
I never felt this empty before
And if I ever need someone to come along,
Who's gonna comfort me, and keep me strong?
We are all rowing the boat of fate
The waves keep on coming and we can't escape
But if we ever get lost on our way
The waves would guide you through another day
Far away, I'm breathing, as if I were transparent
It would seem I was in the dark, but I was only blindfolded
I give a prayer as I wait for the new day
Shining vividly up to the edge of that sea
Maybe they just don't give a damn
But if I ever need someone to come along
I know you would follow me, and keep me strong
People's hearts change and sneak away from them
The moon in its new cycle leads the boats again
And every time I see your face
The ocean heaves up to my heart
You make me wanna strain at the oars, and soon
I can see the shore
Oh, I can see the shore
When will I see the shore?
I want you to know who I really am
I never thought I'd feel this way towards you
And if you ever need someone to come along,
I will follow you, and keep you strong
And still the journey continues on quiet days as well
The moon in its new cycle shines on the boats again
I give a prayer as I wait for the new day
Shining vividly up to the edge of that sea
And every time I see your face
The ocean heaves up to my heart
You make me wanna strain at the oars, and soon
I can see the shore
We are rowing the boat of fate, but the waves keep attacking us
But isn't that still a wonderful journey? Aren't any of them a wonderful journey?

I met somebody funy and i know it's time to remain silent i did not escape from the argument but i did follow him to maur , the feeling are out of sudden,well i finish my assignment today but it seem fine to me ,i have a strong frinedships with my friends and we all argue before but it get better after that , there is a guy told me that sam don't talk bullshit if really good friends you will not have argument , i ask why would you think that ? he said if a real friendship and undestanding each other will have tolerate and will not have problems while talking.then i ask if you said like that means this kind of people hard to find? he said yes, and one other friends said NO if that is a girl ! FUCK YOU it's a no weh some girls just want to agree what you said and they know it's wrong , I ask huh why said that? he told us that last time there was a girl trying to get a better life and she started to act stupid at first and actuly he get the infomation of person that he want to get into .. i said where got such people ohh .. he said got  just you don't know those girl will said something like things you like but you don't feel it ... HA how do they do it? he said if you want to know look around your uncles la you also not don't know thier lifestyle ... i guess he correct and the other guy was diam diam ... he saidwhen you notice it's too late idle you get married or maybe you have a child when you notice it's too late. I said erm somehow it makes sence ... He said sei chai last time you also see before la you go club that time open bottle paid bill that time you got chick come near anot ? those chick i told you they always at the club one just you don't know when they know a time they will use diffrent kinda of style to get near you.....ok la i keep quiet ok i really don't know about this but i know it makes sence when he told me... the club or pub really got those people waiting and looking around . NO COMMENT this is one of the days went out Tea with old junks X D.

a solid friendship got argument ?
a friendship doens't have argument is perfect?
agree what your friends said will make them more happy?
a things that you told them they won't agree will it cause realationship problem?
a silent remain and it's going to start
i think i give my self sometimes to understand
they failed to understand because they want to hear what they want to hear
i just notice that and i think it's true.

I have no idea god gave life 
life and meant to be hi and low
the bibble said if you can't hold on let it go
if you can't that is a things that you need to appreciate
i believe the bibble said
it's a normal things
why would you want to care
if there is a things you would want to care why not care about yourself
yourself is in danger
mind drop by and save your self....

So sorry my dear this few days i really buzy and sorry i did not reply you on msn or sms i'm very sorry Y.Y my bad forgive me ya X D

Just a Simple post

NLP PROGRAM X D DR ERNEST WONG ROX
SUNWAY COLLEGE LEDERSHIP CAMP LAST 2 YEARS X D

Phone  Lost And Replace?

Carbon Black ? X D

Wallpaper

ME X D

Say that you stay a little
Don't say bye bye tonight
Say you'll be mine
Just a little of bit of love Is worth a moment of your time

Knocking on your door just a little
So cold outside tonight
Let's get the fire burning
I know, I keep it burining right

If you stay, won't you stay - stay

Save room for my love
Save room for a moment to be with me
Save room for my love save a little
Save a little for me
Won't you save a little
Save a little for me - ohh

This just might hurt a little
Love hurts sometimes when you do it right
Don't be affraid of a little bit of pain
Pleasure is just on the other side

Let down your guard just a little
I keep you safe in these arms of mine
Hold on to me - pretty baby
You will see I can be all you need

If you stay, won't you stay - stay

Save room for my love
Save room for a moment to be with me
Save room for my love save a little
Save a little for me
Won't you save a little
Save a little for me - ohh

Ohhh come on

Make time to live a little
Don't let this moment slip by tonight
You never know what you are missing untill you try
I keep you satisfied
If you stay, won't you stay - stay

Save room for my love
Save room for a moment to be with me
Save room for my love save a little
Save a little for me
Won't you save a little
Save a little for me - ohh

Save room for love
Save room for a moment to be with me
Save a little, save a little for me
Won't you save a little
Save a little for me

......

I been to NLP program for 2 days , and it's great to heading to there.Nothing much rushing assignment nowadays my finals are finnish but, i need pass up my assignment on next tuesdays

aiks i slacking leh 2 days liow haha not doing things but i promissed my self after 3 30 i will do my assignment X D.......................................................................................................................................

just sorry, truly sorry

erm today went to early class at 11 oc X D ,then ended at 12 oc called up zk and ask his for lunch, then we went to McDonald because he's getting his psp from the chicx so , just wait hahaha me , zk and pan 3 sohem sit there and talk...i'm not feeling well stomach very pain . but i hold and wait till 1oc she came den ,ok lo take psp and run haha zk said want to go arcard i told him better don't if not later i lau sai haha den went to car park and send zk home.

after sending zk home i msg my pet brother ... ok la this time he's right la so i assume think are ok but end up he like angry with that question... i was asking him those question. sad weh i dowant to argue with him leh but , takan i just said ok what he said meh ... so aiks dowant talk la , i think i made him mad well since last few days were argue with some problem , it me i guess i'm tired of doing my works rushing like hell but i din tell him that , things i should not said i told him well he can't take it @@.. so means i screw up ... aiks just don't care about that...

later on around five uncle actually msg me, but i din reply due to i don't know how to talk to him ... and i was out with friends until 6 something, i check my blog and Tai drop me a msg said that uncle looking for me so i called him up and ask what's going on?He was talking in a hurry and said free later , i got something to discuss with you , oh lord he knows that i'm having holidays ...shit la

weh i quite lazy to go out with him, he actually came at 10 oc and pick me up i was in the cafe , then he bring me for beer again somewhere nearby his house and having a talk ... well well well i though he was asking me to help him but in fact he doesn't mention that and he ask me how am i nowadays...tell him what happened then he said "Sam if you know you going too far or too fast , better stop don't keep on do that it only make the distance more far or fast " then i think back again , i think I'm wrong at the moment but i already told him I'm sorry but he seem like lost trust in me .so i really don't know how i think this time i really hurt his feeling , can't blame what i think he is strong , he said he can accept but in fact he can't , so i'm wrong again . just 2 jag and talk about it i also told him that I'll not be around due to some reason. he said oh okie uncle today find you is not want you to do what you don't want to do , uncle want to know how are you doing only , uncle Ben you are funny nowadays , i talk few things about it and i'm not drunk so he send me home .

i'm sad that i ask him that question

i'm really sorry i don't meant to hurt your feeling

i just want to let you know how i think about you

i think i going too hard that why i failed to tell you

i'm very sorry for all off that

i think we are having a solid friendship

so i think you could accept what i tell you

but it's not what i think

i made a mistake again

Uncle told me that no need to worry

but i told him i don't know how he feel because i scare i hurting his feeling

that is the only problem

forgive me

i'm really sorry about that

i guess i'm too late to said sorry .

i have no words on my petbrother and i hope he understand

Last few days and week i'll been busy on my assignment for my finals so hardly wrote a post ... it's rushing den.....actuly nothing much happend but it's happend in some conversation...k la that day mengz told me about her , she sudelly get problem with mengz so i tell him no to fire her up just keep quite and he said he been "tahan and tahan"  then she still said until mengz fedup and start argument haha, i know this would happend but i guess is not so fast i told him he said nevermind if she want back off i can still survire, well he's really strong la hardly pull him down he know too much haha ,beacause got a distance of age and knoledge lo haha nevermind as in my eyes if people will angry with me i'm ok because this is true , i 'm scare that he don't said it out in direct, so i would not know so much infomation also thank you him .his ego also quite high macam poan but it's cool to talk with ... then we came out and talk same things it's the matter of her deeper info and other things then he ask me that days what happend? i said my petbrother la he always don't see what i write then he keep use his own thinking and talk .. damn it weh ....he said i know la i know la fark la he doens't know anythings ... since last time he said he read news and see many things in life so i guess he understand what is SOUND AUDIO ENGERING so i did not tell him much about that then ... he argue with me he said aiya you din't tell me early , he said you make mengz lost a big project in genting ? i was thinking what happend ohh if i make him lost a project like that i think i would not having tea with him nowadays. was so pissed of that sentance ....then later i ask why i make him lost project then he said ai ya you should said he do PA system ... fark weh how do i know how much understanding of you got in SOUND AUDIO ENGERING i though you know but you don't know don't bother to ask and use your own thinking and said something to me you said i din tell you but how am i going to tell you like that?At that moment i just said i wrong beacause i don't want to argue with him ... i really want to tell him sometime then he said i scare this friendship break come on la if you so trust in your friends why don't you understand the sentance , he always said my english sux how sux is sux when you don't ask the things you don't know.... cause this few week my mood abit hot so i don't want to argue with him so i'm expecting that he will accept that is my wrong then sudelly a msg come now you know you wrong la ... wah lau ... pick up my fire ...ok i talk to him this time ... he still don't get it and he said i want give her see , she also don't know what you writing so you got problem?Ok i admin again i wrong still he want to argue ... so guess what i feel bad that i scold him but , if i don't do that he does it then i tell him he said he learn from me ... anything since he's like that so let it be.

the meet of him at my house

Great he found me for tea i was happy but he started something... THE RO things ... I TOLD HIM i don't want to care about it anymore , he always said you don't care then don't play .... wah i tell you like that you said you having fun? so i tell him i also having fun can? he said if like this your acc don't play la ... he talks things that he din't even look at he himself i just sad about that ... then he said they so bad tax my account ...they must be bosong me ... not to help anyone but i told him maybe they din do it in purpose , he said no no this must be purpose they bosong me, they can't remember what they done to you and you are the one who get angry and thinks lots of things in your own mind, so my tone abit high when talking to him , why i talk abit high tone because when i going out with them they doens't even talk about him ,then he said what i see is what i don't see ok i agree but do you really understand that sentance and do you really know how to use? No you just think your way. i told him since you not that happy quit la since now your got girl friends you can chat all day long what? i did not  tell him and he's always using her gf to backing up .. i guess he thinks 2 agree with 1 sure 1 lose so he does that...so everytime he bring his gf in topic that we argue i sure said my fault , as he told me in car you know if you are my girlfriends you must support what i said ... he told me in car and also i guess he told her.it not i jelous it's you don't see how things do and i just tired to argue with him...

if i'm really your petbrother

if you really understand my words ,

if you don't ever copy the msg to give somebody and ask i guess you know many things.

if you really think my words are hard for you it's a no,

why would you give up to read and understand,

i'm sorry that i talk to you so loud but i don't mean it,

i just hope you understand somedays ,

i been telling much and more about it,

 you doens't remember what you said.

i'm just sorry about that ,

if you said our friendship will break. 

i guess it's won't break but it's will only silent

i don't wish to happend.

i just want to tell you that if someone keep agree with you are you happy with that? if he know you said wrong things and he just want to get better with you and he just agree?I don't think i'll be happy , i want to tell you that if people keep agree with you that may have problems, it depance how much you believe , i always want a good relationship between you and me because you treat me as you petbrother, and i want to tell you many things but you told me you hate people that talk direct so i really don't know how to tell you about that,if you want a solid relationship i think you better slove the problems first , if not when day goes it will bring more problems.Heal it when it's small , don't wait it till it big everyone will suffer. i will not angry when we are in the talking or chating, i just angry why you did not read and understand i really angry about that, but nevermind what done is done, if i just prise you like god , will it make you happy?if it's will , then sorry i really don't know how to agree or prise somebody maybe i will but not on you.because i believe and i trusted you, don't make the promiss break.

I really don't know why i wrote this,

i have to wrote it down because i don't know who to tell...

Picture

what does it means?

I don't know where i start
I don't know when i statt
I don't know why i start

i'm just sorry about that...
i being too selfish for the pass week,i was lost when i tried to listen to people said i will just ignore it that make people wack out .... my friends my members my petbrother, i'm very sorry for the this.

Pass weeks i want somebody to agree with me i have no idea just ....


Back to sunday...
early in the morning ,
owh guess i'm not at home,
at mengz office ,
sleep over night there,
mei kwan was there,
i planed to do my work at his office,
but doens't work out,
went home and guess my father are not in,
i sometime i hope for that to happen......
....a sudelly visit of my Uncle from china sudelly back ... make me shock and i was stunned don't know what to said just said hi... after all i din did much things but later on all my cousin came to my house for dinner... so went out with them.( silent talk when the tabble don't have my father here, he's at factory rushing Uncle tan's exhibition ...
aiks no comments)

almost midnight....(11oc)
my dad came back i have no idea, as i mention he was angry me for no reason so i did not said anything,den he ask me go behind pack food for him,after i came back brother call back and he said he want to talk to father ... ok den i accept that call and i called him, and i just do my work ....as he talk and talk sudelly he ask me last night where you go you want die ? I just tell him i went out to do my work...He keep said something i just listen....until mid night 1 oc he was talking to my brother.he said want get a new car no idea what car...( i just remeber that few week ago he ask me for my IC i was suprize that, did not ask him for the reason as he called me on the phone so i just gave him.

Monday the most boring class at 2. 30
i walk up around 9 oc to finish up my other assignment.
then went to class....you know what don't know what reason my mum sudelly gave me RM20 for todays something suprize me.Then did care much just go to college and came back around 6oc i reach Basketball court..not play just walking around Ben-G bicycle is here so take a ride , i love cycling but once i drop from that metal bar now i don't dare do again...walk see cycle until 7oc i went home bath ... woot... then sleep , was awake at 11 oc and went to bath and do my assignment again, i do until 5 in the morning..my dad came back at 2 in the morning and i was still doing my things he came back and watch tv till 4oc then he went to sleep. i sleep at 5 oc ......


Tuesday morning ...
a 4 hours sleep, wake up and my dad was gone ... it too early...suprize me that was he gave me RM50 and was cliped on my wallet...went to college at 9 something abit late into class but lecturer haven came so i'm still early, after finishing class need to go to kai house and help him fix his modem.. damn his house mate were so stupid he keep said that he did change the passwords and the freaking passwords was wrong , guess what i check the line and i notice that it's working fine so i think's it's his account problem so i try the reset password form streamyx shit it works !!!!nothing much just normal days pass...
same goes the same old thing i do .i walk around my house area ...

The Tuesday night
many things happend...i recieve a NLP program again, i need to attend!!!! just fuck it weh i have enought or that it's dammaging my brain...oh well i still have to face it.well it's on next monday ...few friends called me at skype and talk for some time ..they ask me again that question i was avoiding until i don't know how to answer, they ask the same question at the same time , sam why you on skype i though you were ... eh eh eh don't know don't bother ask can? so talk other stufff.... dad came home early around 11 oc.and i pmed my petbrother and ask some news about anwar...he scold me for some words, ok it my fault den he said i'm talking action to him so i guess oh well if you don't know friday what happend den i just said sorry. don't want to said too much as some of the day i just told him what happend.but still he don't get.

wow guess what uncle ben really did call me all the time ,ok la haha i feel ok with that...he understand me well ,for my petbrother you know what, i guess he think he love to read news so i was asking what happend he just trow some hash words to me, and i was thinking last time he's the one who said (IF WANT TELL TELL IF DON'T WANT TELL DON'T TELL)
see he said diffrent things and he said i talk to stright forward,i talk stright forward to you because you don't see things that clear, If i don't bother to care i would not bother to tell , you don't like stright forward , marks my words todays you said like that don't tell me other things , you said it will hurt people feeling actuly i just want to argue with him but as i know he sometime want people to agree with him so do i, so i just said yes, would you see a boring conversation ?If you hurt people feelin on the spot it will heal fast, if you telling things that if not so direct oh fine who's had the more hard feeling now?

BBQ DAY.... GEEEKEONG BDAY...

lazy for the whole day...
doing nothing @@
well i did something cool that is i mod my cpu with more fan hehe,
today wake up 11 oc slack until 2 oc went to get my lunch and 3 oc i started to mod my cpu in to more fan because it's hot since weeks ago so now i mod it into more fan to make it cold...it take me about 3 hours to do that because i clean up my CPU also so there is no big deal lo 6 oc Anson we went out to buy some stuff then went to geekeong BBQ party haha guess what we went there around 7oc and people haven come so me and Anson start the fire 1st haha less then 10 min the fire were light up this is the most fast that we use to be... aiks still need to wait haha to spread the charcoal and top up new charcoal so 8oc people come and started BBQ at first only me , Anson, geekeong , boon, juan, bin wei were here so we ate the fried noodle 1st haha later that we went to BBQ actually i'm de only person who BBQ the chicken haha cos no idea just like to BBQ haha .... later on more and more people come haha so talk and laught until 12 oc den @@ mengz call me over to have a Drink at his office so been there lo .. poan and gugu were here and with BIG APPLE haha so happy got stuff to eat ... and they have martel at mengz office i drank one cup then stop cos i'm driving weh haha so no care la talk until 3 oc like that ....poan said hungry then went back to my house and had some tea, i went home to put my car back and pack my bag and need to go over to mengz office here and do my works...and this is what i did the whole night and day haha

another tired day....

beep beep beep it's time.....
10.30 oc my phone shows me....
and i did not went to bath...
i just awake and walk around....
and went to wash face and clean up abit....
then i took my pouch and key went to out ....

todays was a tired day i spend whole day at workshop i reach around 11 oc and i finish at 6 something(i injured my hand my right hand damn it, pain like shit @@ the wax droped onto my hand and it feel so high @@....pain as well)and i went for COD lack of cash to use no money use jor leh need COD haha sold the phone around RM700 and uncle gave me RM50 for my pocket money.Oh well haha it's money licking good haha so just tired leh reach home about 7 oc then was quite tired , serious tired aiks then went nap on the floor around 2 hours while watching tv... i wake up around 11  something my then someone msg me oh it's my petbrother and guess who on the line at the same time , SKYPE has 4 people in 1 talking chat that is my brother,my sis , ivan and me. wah lau my dad sudelly angry me so sad weh, maybe i said wrong things again ... don't know la my bro and ivan laught at me said my wrong .... no comment la they always trow thier life terio to me ... HOME GOT WHAT HAPPEND YOU GUYS KNOW MEH? chew.... said until you 3 at home only .... then all diam diam ... 

Althought RM50 is not much but i'm happy with that thanks for the note uncle haha, next time u want sell what tell me tell me haha i help u seel haha... i told mengz that, he told me he want to sell off his collection i said ok ok give me photo until now also haven send to me ...don't know him la ....

i'm looking forward on Ebusiness , i get support and they ask me play what ... i was full of ???? don"t ask me arr i don't know haha .... they said ai ya u don't know what you want to play then you want play stupid arr you? @@ yer sorry la , i serious PK leh that day so sia sui ... i tog i got 400 in my wallet but when i want to borrow to mengz that time left 200 only ... then i think @@ where does it go oh my @@ my petbrother there... aiks i tog he give me on tuesday 1 geh but he sick so nvm lo...aiks see him sick i also feel funny don't know what happend to him sunday sick tuesday not feeling well wor.... din ask much lo her gf msg me and told me erm seem weird ... not to said her funny but i seem she get more strange and more strange ... aiks don't want to said la as i been scold by my uncle he said people relationship you care for what , takan you said this good then who take the bad one? let it be and let he him self notice this is something i found out ok now i know why ... sometime i over helping. uncle said you see is like that but what they see is diffrent so why would you want to care? ok ok i understand i seldom msg her girl friends due to when a close friends girlfriends i will not msg much because of some of my personal reason.they always said i stupid thinking ok if you don't agree then don't care lo.

Just weird lo, mengz always said i'm over , he stop answer my question after he thinks that i'm in stupid mode haha guess what it show how you think ok.... he said sam you talk too , well ok den i don't talk much he said i emo wor jar 2 then talk or don't talk leh? haha nvm la just talk la i always did that lo he will entertain when he feel like too haha .... no worry la if he can't tahan me he will stop should not be a problem hehe....

ops i get my result de @@ CGPA 2.75 only arrr
last sem is 3.2  leh @@ owwww ...
aiks who call me go go play aful haha dai sei lo haha

serious i seldom met uncle ben almost 1 week jor i did not call him he also understand me he did not call me also wao how great was that haha ... i think he is happy now i think. Just want to drop a msg to him if i could saw him X D.

Just dots.....

ok i rare talk about my dad right, how to tell a men like him , erm i just finding a point to target, well well he's a men at the age of 50th he still working , and he go insane while he working i have no idea , when i was young i don't know why he does't that after when i'm abit older and older i realize yerr actuly he's doing for me and my sis and bro ,ermm now i regret why not i spend more time call and talk or maybe appreciate him when he's at home, i just too selfish for my self i went out for my enjoyment and all i ask was money from him , as my role play that time i think he's just a money machine , well later on when i enter to college things just change , guess what has change my father even work more longer and all my time to get to talk to him were like less then an hour, can you imagine that i come back from college around 6 and i do do my stuff until 1 in the midnight he just reach home , do you see how i feel everytime i think about this my tears are always falling down, i hope i listen to uncle said i should not enter to college because you are not what you meant to be you can learn from the outside , i was disagree that my mum always tell me if you don't have a cert you will totally die in this world, but now i see , since like that how about my father i can't see him work like a freak and what i can do was just watching come on he's is old how much time do he have and i have just started my journey of life , all i think i thought i can make him happy an proud and i think i'm very proud of the four credits, he did ask me what i want to do i spend 1 and half year doing my things... and i have enought.i went into college after all i found out he even work hard and i have not much time to talk and all about him it's was like i wake up he's gone when i finish my work and i wanted to talk to him he was like too tired , how am i going to talk with him when you see him that kind of face.

I told my petbrother you are very lucky , you have a family dinner everyday and you just ask me that question month ago i really think back about my father i hate him but i love him but in the way of hate i started to change to love because i realise that why he could do that and why i should not hate him in this situation, i just hate my self as he mention son you want do what arr?
he ask me that time i said i don't know can you let me play until i said something? he just said ok it depance on you , you like . that time i can everyday saw him early around 8oc but i did not make use of it , i went out tea talking with frineds , go do black business things talk to uncles this and that ... but i forget my father as i told him that i can survire my self i no longer need your money i gave my mom money if i got more them 500 in my wallet i will it's was like everydays i giving her 50 100 or what i don't mind . i just want to show i can survire and i can give my mother money just to show my father ... how stupid was that. well life been walking in a mistake to make me learn but i regret that now this situation has just switch with me he's the one who going out for business and i'm doing nothing and asking for money and do this and that.hellow come on i just realise i writen so long and my tear keep falling , i can't believe that , last time what i think i will consider this is stupid but nor today it's change , things always changes .

i'm very sorry to make you work like mad,
i thought this could make you proud,
i did not notice till i found out from my frineds,
and also that motivation talk change me,
i just saw what i saw ,
actuly my dad has alot of things to share with me,
but it's too late he has no time,
and he is working hard just for me ,
because i'm only child that still young and need education,
ok i'm confuse,
but i will not stop here ,
because he's so hardworking on his job and earning money to give me better life,
if i stop ,
i'm ruing my life and i hurt his feeling again,
so i must not failed ,
i must do well,
if i can't
just pass that subject,
and future study that subject,
i won't let it go again.
Thank you dad i love you but brother were right how many year left about our life .
My Brother were right, i guess i'm wrong .

Uncles were right too, why no i help him to take care for his shop i could be someone else today but nevermind whats goes means goes, i did not regret that but i just finally see how much my dad love me and i'm sorry that i din notice , by right now i saw this i think i'm not too late.

GOD BLESS MY FATHER!!!
HE'S NOT A MACHINE!!!
HE'S JUST A MEN TRYING TO GIVE SOMEONE BETTER LIFE!!!
ALL I WANT FOR HIM WAS HIS HEALTH!!!
I DID NOT WISH FOR MUCH JUST THAT.....

Oh today
Morning breeze...i'm awake what i heard was my phone deep again and again i walk up and i went to bath room my stomach doens't feel right @@ ... and i bath i notice my back has a CHICKE POK HOLE wah lau eh like pain press press nothing out @@ don't know itzit AIDS haha , then went to college and listen to MarkTeh for lecturing oh well guess what todays topic is ISA wah what a tittle to talk.. then finish called mengz wehh haha guess what looking for him to ate lunch but he said he at offfice can't make a move so i tell him need me pack i come over la... he said what you eat then i said KFC want? he said ok ok "KILL YOU" haha then pack and go to SS2 there his office there wow kind of suprize when i reach the aircon started to do the installation haha so i guess ok lo i ask him eh no funiture geh he said that pet pet said 11 oc come until now 1 oc also haven come .... !(*@#!@#_!()@ he said la ... then i was eating my meal and Mei kwan , chu hang and mengz was there haha i pack for them leh so good haha, then 3oc mei kwan went off @@ she said she need go do faicial haha ok lo mengz said sam later you free arr i said free until 9 oc , he said going to ikea ... around 4 something like that went to ikea after waiting that furniture come and fix at 3 30 .... 4 something went to ikea and walk ... guess what untill 10oc leh @@ wah lau i so scare my petbrother angry leh i tell him a lie i said that i'm at oneU at the fist time he ask where i am ... i so freaking scare because this is not what i plan too mengz also dowant to delay .. as in he know i have a met with my petbrother... he also quickly and do all the stuff , aiks nothing leh just go there help abit walk get idea and do some vector... 2nd msg my petbrother were am i tiu lo i just reach ss2 office there and i told him i reach him he said he finish dinner with justin i was like ha cham lo like fong people fei gay @@yerr sorry leh then he said nvm i come to your house. woot lucky @@ and i tell him this when i was talking with him at the mamak... so freaking hungry leh mengz they all also hungry because we din't eat our dinner @@ and mengz try to send me back only he went out for dinner....when i reach home i sit around and relax my leg because i walk too long haha no pain but tired....then about five min my petbrother came with smile wah lucky he smile i scare people come to me with black face @@...
i'm sorry edmondson i thought mengz can make it on9 oc as in your msg you said it's 10 oc yam cha at asia cafe i guess i can't make that and i'm so please and thanks that you come to accompany me to eat my dinner THANK YOU.... but i always scare he get bully by other people , as in uncle always tell me if you see people get bully help as you can they might see something in you , i believe that because i done it wrong in one time just one time .. and i never walk the wrong road... AGAIN.

sam wake up sam wake up ,
my phone has the beep sound,
i can't really notice that,
i'm sleeping really ,
i jump up on the sofa about 11,
guess what i check my phone and it's reenee ,
my penang friends she came down for a walk ,
well well she actuly my 3 days realife friends,
i went to penang last month and i visit her,
she is one of the online friends,
i'll stop here follow up the long post.

Well it's 11 oc sam why aren't you awake what's going on are you sad are happy or are you gay today, so what really border you sam wake up wake up ... ops i'm awake, i look at my pc and it's off i think and think oh i remember i turn it off, i saw the lighting ...that why i close.. then i check my phone you know what going on? it's a message from my penang online friend.

after lunch time,i'm not having any meal yet but i'm searching for infomation about ISA... time past 1 then i message my petbro and ask something about ISA.. he pull always my question and fill in yesterday incident, guess what actul i was asking ISA but he keep refer to the GOV i have no idea what he try to proof, about the yesterday incident i sms him that i told him that the petrol are not going to sell petrol but i did tell him that this depance how much you believe i just told him that.Another argument with him , i ask him so what you want to proof?proof that i'm stupid?i guess he don't know how to answer so i ask again the question ,i so sorry to keep on ask you to answer my question but i just want to you to know what you want to proof to me i'm really don't know what happend that why i want to know seriouly that why i keep ask my petbrother what do you want to proof to me?
actuly i really don't know what he want to proof may be he try to correct me , if that so i'm happy to let him correct me as in i also don't know what happend but in fact he din aswer my question .. he used the young people style. Ok not to said he is bad but i wounder what you really want to tell me i guess he tog i'm angry or what sort actuly i'm not,i'm happy when things that i tell in not confirm were wrong , he just walk always and i did not know the answer for that .I'm so sorry just wright it down here because i'm not going to tell him , because i don't know how to tell him and i don't want to bring old stuff back.I just upsad after that i think i should not ask him twice what he want to proof , I made a mistake again , it's my fault i'm very sorry, who would know ... i just don't care , i will just wright it down.

After That I clean up my cpu around 3 oc i use the blower to blow the dust in the cpu and it takes around 2 hours to let me do that , later on i wash wira and clean up then i wax it , almost 8 oc i'm done then went to bath ..follow mother out to pasar malam , and i went out with my OwnerClub haha for tea and talk about 1 hour then back home and msg her for awhile damn i'm in blur mode so i end her around 11 something then went out with mengz for tea because need to wait my dad come home mengz need to talk to my father about the project so i guess we talk at the mamak until 1. 30 .. i called my father and he said he at home de so we paid and went home and have a talk until 2 somthing .... now 3 35 i still awake.

Sorry my dear i told you that i went for rest,
but i did not do it i'm very sorry,
i went out with mengz because he told me early and i just remember,
i'm serious tired , the whole day doing clening up i'm just tired,
and for the mistake i made today i think i've learn much,
sorry to my petbrother as i know he won't come here and read,
nevermind , i guess i know what i need to said,
someday i'll know how.

i'm just sorry to all of you,
i don't meant to leave you alone my dear,
but if you see my face you will know that i'm tired,
just forgive me ,
i did not tell you because i scare you were asleep,
sorry i broke the promissed i called you sleep early rite,
this is my fault just forgive me,
miss you.

This is true i serious want to know what my petbrother want to tell me but i have no idea sorry for the answer that i want you to answer i don't meant to hurt your feeling but i just what to know why, if i only could tell you this i wish , when things stop argue we will have no distance , this is not good due to it's a things that too many agreement with you will cause you too proud , i know you know much things but if you win and you just want to correct me , i guess i'm ok with that but if you try to do any hankie pankie i guess i have no idea what's all about.

she spend a half day in the workshop doing her batik i saw her online i msg her msn but she din reply so i tog she was bz then i started to send her email.when my email send she msg me in msn so shocking ... then talk and talk i cut her off @@ because i serious have no idea what i asking for .. better cut off if not wrong things come from the mouth.

what days is today?

erm feel right and feel not right, what could happened ?
i was looking at the sky and look for my answer,
what could make me feel that weird?
seem like it's was the dime light making this happen.

Erm friends friends friends how could i wish that i always tell you the truth, wondering why am i not telling you , i guess it's hurting right? or maybe it's my fault to not letting you know that I'm not into it.But how cruel was that .. straight forward ya.

less don't care about that how about erm the uncle that they recelly find me , great i just demolish them with one words if you want to find me call me i'll on the skype or msn and web cam you and talk so that i can do my work and talk as well so my left and right brain were moving , how lame was that . But it's an idea.

The morning mow
guess it's the pain and the feeling came back , i reach a very pain situation all i did was i hold and sit for awhile and things could be normal i guess, the body of mine is back to normal now it's the leg i have no idea it been almost 2 years ...a futsal match drop me out for 2 years ... could this call stoping me from ball?Today i did not forcus on the pain but , the pain remind me that i need to take a bath or else i'm in deep shit....

The Nigh after Dinner
My petbro msg me i was just finish my dinner at that time, was thinking how serious he look at a case, when things is not writen in the news he won't support that , i'm just droping by a msg to let him know what's going on , fine fine i don't want to argue actuly i'm deeply sleeping tired i should said. look look it's his fact again ...... ok ok i just pass down ... I PASS haha ...

My ideas that i told....
a magnet bed,a cool fountain and a cool 4side movie plane that show movie.

guess who's on the line today ... someone frong penang called me haha guess who.....
......Ivan lo !!! chey haha i tog who could call my skype as my status were invi haha this cause they day .... lazy talk don't want to think.

I started to sms her in the early morning but after class i guess she too sleepy and went to sleep she did not saw my sms , later on she send me some very very funny sms
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q U R S T U V W X Y Z


DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT MEANS?




It's i miss you @@


ouch how touching was that ...

i did reply her but she hang up again aiks i guess she is busy at something so i did no reply anymore msg till the night has fall that what i started to wondering why could she hang up the sms ? what could happend? is she angry? oh lord i really don't know till she send me an email that made me reply her i and finally i understand what happend . Lucky she email me if not i thought she were angry.no much things just she is cute and open minded and playful, as what i see.

I don't care how many guys you had before,
i don't mind each and one of them,
but please remember i'm always here,
so please do me a flavor,
don't make me invincible,
i don't mind you look other guys at the streets,
i'll give you your space and time,
so please understand me and give me my time and space,
everythings could be well done ,
i was just worry ,
worry about your health ,
dear if you aren't sleeping at this time ,
please go try and sleep,
i don't want to see you sick,
i know you would stop replying me after i told you so,
this is good for you and good for me,
things i really share with you were a facts,
how would you see it,
i would not know,
but i would know that you giving me chance,
i'm appreciating this relationship,
so please understand.

He was a loner before ,
He failed in every relationship,
He letting go everything,
He share things too.

He hope for a table for 2,
He hope success in this relationship,
He will try his best to catch all,
He share too much.


It about 3 10 i'm tired if i could get another marsage oh my back and for my leg how lovely could that be... just once more.... i'm tired i'm shuting down soon please please do take care of your self.

I'm sorry.

sometime i don't know what she think ,
i just want to go near to her and tell her something,
but i'm scare she flew aways,
they said dare do there you goes,
i did that many times but not on this relastionship,
i don't know why ,
might be my problem or she just waiting for me to said that words,
how i wish that i could tell you that i want to be with you,
how i wish that you saw this but i did not gave her my link did i?
i forget i did or i din.
so i would just said sorry Y.Y

nevermind all i wish that she could sms me or msg me on the internet or maybe email me i would be happy as times goes i will go deeper into her and i'll tell her what's going on.that day was my chance i know that is my chance but ... aiks some urgent stuff went me off.Sorry that i left early there , i want to play longer with you but i have to make a move sorry girl.the other day someone told me you not really happy after that it's my fault , or i leave too early.I'm really sorry = ( i bring your mood down i doens't plan like that.I'm sorry.

sometimes i did not msg you because i'm shy,
i scare i'm out of topic because you are not my girl friends yet,
all i wish is to let you know i'm serious about it but in your eye it might be not that serious to you if that's a point let me know Y.Y i'm a bad guesser.

I regret i just regret ....
I should not leave,
I just want to take sometime to talk to you,
I break my promissed because i did not do that,
I'm very sorry about that,
I'm true about you.
I don't know why i love
I only know that was a sign
I just ......

Pass my time at his house hahaha

I Struggling on JB to SG or PG to PG
aiks sad leh weh no comment on that.

Uncle PetPet called me to his house to help ...
do his paper work , chey i tog what so good find me cari me stupid 1 geh..
lucky he pandai haha buy some ice cream for me and order pizza for me wuhahaha so happy ok la actuly not much thing to help him i guess he's is too bored den find me to accompany him i guess.sometime i really don't know this kind of uncle think what 1
so weird 1 geh ... they might be crazy but they are wealthy weh... all they want was fun and happy arrr... this is uncle ben told me. Uncle PetPet another one WH4 1 no girls around sure find me , why don't want find uncle ben jimmy teoh tan !!!! yerr you all so weird. ok la sit down and talk in his house while i using the laptop to on9 and chat with my pet bro gf...blog as well haha he was talking in his workshop haha i was doing bloging and chating as i see he's just doing his stuff and i just reply what he ask haha din ask many question.

Eh i'm serious that my studies, i don't want to jump in to any business ... i told Tai and i think he's going to tell uncle, i need my free time to do my works and my jobs so please give me some personal space.And i told them don't find me offen leh i got 3 more week to my finals de so let me finsh and the following holidays i catch up with you guys...i will call when i got time k.Don't share me your life story jor i not sick of it i'm just over excited to listen so please stop ok.

i believe that they won't come here and read because i know haha they won't read the bottom parts because it's a long way story and it's gona be something else they only read the recent post i guess this is something i expected X D that why if something important that could be a long post haha X D.

the calls , the message , the voice

i got the deal and i get the deal
Uncle ben give me an offer , all i need to do is follow up the bill and help him check the claim bills .. he offer me salary(RM700) + 1 phone(W960i or K850i) choose one, guess what i refuse that offer , i din said much but i just refuse that offer
he was shocked to listen that , and he said that time i though you said you want me buy 1 phone for you? as my reply was huh it's was only a joke i can get it if i want to i just don't feel like buying new phone because after changing it , it will be more gossip to let people to said about it.I'm looking forward on 2nd hands phones haha out of sudden.today i just made him shocked , uncle jimmy called me sudelly so wired he ask about uncle ben he called me to call uncle ben for meeting ,eh you cannot call him meh ? then i just drop a msg and tell uncle ben later what's going on i don't know .So i msg Tai and told him about that.

haha later on i know what happend, 2 old man playing cat chasing mouse ....
chey i though what so urgent. as in the afternoon i was replying them the sms but i forget to sms back to my pet brother @@ ouch how ... i know he sure think i do it on purpuse 1 lo aiks nvm la i'm normal with it de.Today really bz replying msg ... aiks as my fish msg me also i also said wrong things ... so sad ....lucky she din't ask much things about it, if not haha something that she should not know she will know.

i let my pet brother TROWOFF he reply me enjoy your bendan gather <- wah want like that meh you hate because of some reason , aiks i don't know how to said la , just sudelly feel that he's quite selfish leh , the point is if you don't like don't bring down people and agree with you lo, i found out he sometimes really want people agree with him as i know him so long a small argument has lighted , don't know what he will think la but as i know sometime i can't agree with him, because i found that he's wrong ermm but actuly diffrent people diffrent answer lo so i'm not angry with it i'm just worry that people start to ignore him just because of that aiks... just after that msg i feel funny don't know want to tell him that it's rude to said that or what... just woundering why would he want to use that words BENDAN in the msg .
it was like something shape telling and pointing . Just hard to tell .

that day i kena fucked, damn so out of sudden weh uncle said oui sui chai can your fucking talk that time you give us some eye contact?Y.Y aiks i normal with it leh what want me talk and give you eye contact? they said something but i forget what...
but i remember i said oh like that only ma doens't means i don't respect de ma....
wah kena shoot 99 ok ok my bad ...KEEP QUITE den Y.Y

nothing much just like that night time went for gathering with ON9 friends and had a buffet at YUEN steamboat then speed at ldp for 10 min reach aman suria then go home.

she went to clubbing @@

There are many prodigal sons
On our city streets they run
Searching for shelter
There are homes broken down
People’s hopes have fallen to the ground
From failures

This is an emergency!

There are tears from the saints
For the lost and unsaved
We’re crying for them come back home
We’re crying for them come back home
And all your children will stretch out their hands
And pick up the crippled man
Father, we will lead them home
Father, we will lead them home

There are schools full of hatred
Even churches have forsaken
Love and mercy
May we see this generation
In it’s state of desperation
For Your glory

This is an emergency!

Sinner, reach out your hands!
Children in Christ you stand!
Sinner, reach out your hands!
Children in Christ you stand!

And all Your children will stretch out their hands
And pick up the crippled man
Father, we will lead them home
Father, we will lead them home


Wow i'm tired today the work that i done was so tired , after all i keep replying msg my pet brother , some old friends , most of the time uncle keep reply me...actuly i'm tired of replying the sms and i told my pet brother i'm driving that time i was driving to home but i lazy reply him so i just focus and driving till i reach home well well i on my pc as usal then uncle called he start with " oie sui chai what you doing no reply me arrr "
i was tired and i told him , he hear my voice i guess ... then talk and talk .... the best part is don't know what he told me i fell asleep haha so syok haha he talk and talk ...but i sleep de then 10 something i call him back i told him sorry aiks you know he told i entertaning him so he angry , but later on i told him he said sorry also he just want to find some one to talk , i was asking him aiks you talk to your wife la she always stay at home you always don't call her where can like this 1, he said aiks you normally also talk to her ma nevermind 1 la ... , actuly i want to tell him that his wife actuly very bored at home but auntie told me not to tell him so ok ok, i keep tell him go get a kid la .. then he don't know give what reason and said he have to go . wah lau again !!!
ok suan ... then i called mengz for gay2lat he said ok ok ... then went to his house to gay2lat... den den i msg my her she at club gosh how could she always go club, she give me the answer of i bored , then i nothing to do follow my sis go club. Ouch ok ok my bad i should msg her early but i'm too tired ... aiks then chat chat with her lo ... like this then went home ... called my sg friends for a talk then do nothing haha asking for relaxing .....

opsi X D what have i done today?

ermm today morning wake up aiks leg pain , because yesterday went walking took me about an hour walk up and down and i went to the Basketball court , haha dennis was here so year wait him and i got car send me back.Pain lo Y.Y aiks nvm den do my works and on talk to somebody on the phone about 30 min i think uncle ask me for beering @@ i just tell him that i'm not free, so early and so hot you call me beer sot sot geh tea maybe can ... lucky he din came if not i can't finish my work ... so my whole afternoon was doing my work staying at home at the afternoon...Uncle call again !!!! Want tea ? ermm guess ok i'm finish with my assignment around 8 he called me around 1oc midnight i think so as he came then go out tea with him ...normal talk lo ... actually i very hungry but pai seh leh due to i scare he paid the bill that why i din call any food to eat , as he ask me what i want to eat i always said anything, aiks i know now i'm not earning money but you always paid for me i like feel guilty ... aiks sometime my wallet empty i would just push all the tea or beer things when my wallet has no money i go where also like not happy due to like waiting people to paid...i always tell uncles you count me in the bill please don't one shot, after telling that .. every time they ask me for tea my wallet sure won't come out with money .. this make things worst !!!!arrrr don't know la , then he told me today SAM when people paid for you , you has a meaning or somethings special about you would you think people would simply paid for you?
ouhhh i never think of that question before sound so new too me haha so gay today...then i ask was it i'm too good wuhahahaha...he said nope actuly you are some body that always give advice i see no harm listening from you ... that why i always find you .Yerrr don't always find me la i want to do my assignment and also i need spend sometime with my fish you should know that what...my pet brother also like that, he also always paid the bill aiks at least last night i get to paid for the food but not the drinks, he came and find me haha afternoon he msg me early so i'm ok with everything.funny weh !!!Uncle i think you need to finds someone else better then me i'm no longer free soon i got assignment to rush ... X D ( avoid you la if not later your wife jelous haha you should have a family day arr )

Thanks you Uncles and to my pet brother always spend me.
i love people spend me but not all the time,
i'll start to avoid you guys because it's like gold digger when you guys always paid,
i try not to msg you guys offend because i scare many things happened,
i want to tell you all that i'm happy but you all are not around,
i also don't how i want it to be so better don't ask me,

sometimes i want it to be the old ways,
sometimes i want it to be the new ways.
aiks don't know leh ,
mengz ask me before if like this cannot like that cannot then how only can?
i don't know how to answer @@.
why don't you let it be ?
i asked how to let it be?
he told me just don't tell them , what they do just see only don't tell.
oh lord i can't see people stepping into drain what...
then you want tell them...they change you make noise, then why tell them?
Ohh i get what he means haha then i just blog about it i din tell much.

Oh my i just notice what happened , Tai called me in urgent
i was figuring who could call my emergency number Tai did it.
ermm shocking news and i know why they argue now , lucky i din give comment
if not i'll be goreng haha but as i know this problem is not coming from me
so i guess they won't simply open fire...all about the company things
that it aiks .... i really know why they argue ?when things it's equal.
maybe they don't know i have count that last time maybe recelly they change
i don't know...Tai just tell me abit that why i was wandering....

then went to bath !!!!
hoho i notice today i haven bath haha X D so yeah went to bath !!!

realize things are just simillar with what you having

i don't know how to said but i know how to write ,
it been awhile i look at the sky ,
it remind me the day that my modem dies ,
and that day was chilling ,
but not today.

I want to correct my self for mistake that i made today,
i should not went out last night,
i'm empty today in class,
i was asleep suddenly ,
i saw Mark Teh taking craps with facts,
i don't know what happened but i know it's my fault.

Yew MSG to my phone and i was surprise that he said that I'm bored with her
so yeah i told him early that was not suitable for him,
don't want to listen to me because of age different?
he said you don't know you don't know , but how much do he know?
ok I'm not going to detail he called up and talk due to the time is late so i rather stay at home....

i hate when people ask me to skype...
1st.reason one bad memories...(that how i lost my 1st .....)
2nd.I'm scare to see those people online i would spend time talking with them serious...
3rd I'm happy that my English level learn from there ...
4th i meet those uncles it's bad when my friends found out i talk to uncles....
5th i got too many social life with uncles...
so it's a 4 bad and 1 good .

and now what i notice was , actually people around you are jealously about what you heading so they would make up some shity words to shock you always or make you agree with them, as life go on i found out what makes they said that words "GAY" beacause we found each other offend ? if that so what if i found you always and what could probably other people said ? derrr it's the same ... i talk to stranger because they would tell something they would not tell in life due to the people that you trust the most , normally they won't keep it in to their mouth , they could just jog down somewhere , blog or tell somebody else would have a heart to listen.In fact life actually has alots of meaning and i found it in a special ways , I've seen what i want to , so spending time with older people doesn't mean GAY ok it's a fact that to gain out knowledge so i know much about life , problem came a cross don't escape Manny older people told me , but infact the youngster give the opposite answer so which should i listen , ok ermm i choose the both ways an anlaysis it seem not escaping has stress at first but when problem comes oh lord it's so eazy to fix , but how about the escping ways people started to cauculate your personality ....

Was i wrong?
or maybe i'm wrong at this moment ( you agree with me later? )
no comment!!!

jimmy and ben had an argument i guess it best i stay a side, no idea what's going on as i told them this adult things i'm too small to give comment so yeah i escape and i used the youngster ways .. but i did not know what's going on. so i move on and looking forward for the met of them ,they would argue until things fix so i'm not worry about that..

The fake smile, who could that be?
was esh me?
was esh she?
was esh us?
was esh they?
i don't know who said that to provoked me
but i know i could be one of them .
something i should not know ,
it's expose now ,
what can i do ?
keep you mouth shut...


I hope chai can get me a vr4 engin with good conditional i really want to test it out , they said the G-force were cool so i think i better help my friend to get his engin so we can have a test on it.


place i been too X D
http://wegomapo.blogspot.com/

http://futuristisch.blogspot.com/

http://sunnamwon.blogspot.com/

http://piabramley.blogspot.com/

http://urara1117.blogspot.com/

few days ago what happend?

this is pass week , the random days of my phone misscalleds
just don't want to hear the voice of them.

One of the ramdom night , this is my dinner and i was rushing our with my uncles

Aiks no time to clean it up this is the mest X D


This is one of the visitor dog from one of the auntie dog , it's look cute but it bully my little sporty and whitewhite , it drop by and stay for 3 days . after that it's mum came and pick it up and bye bye haha X D pity this dog aiks 2 of it leg were cacat... this dog is deaf also it can't hear i tested so pity it aiks....





ACtuly i have things to confess.

I don't know but I believe
That some things are meant to be
And that you'll make a better me
Everyday I love you
I never thought that dreams came true
But you showed me that they do
You know that I learn somethng new
Everyday I love you
'Cos I believe that destiny
Is out of our control
And you'll never live until you love
With all your heart and soul.
It's a touch when I feel bad
It's a smile when I get mad
All the little things I am
Everyday I love you
Everyday I love you boy
Everyday I love you
'Cos I believe that destiny
Is out of our control
And you'll never live until you love
With all your heart and soul
If I asked would you say yes?
Together we're the very best
I know that I am truly blessed
Everyday I love you
And I'll give you my best
Everyday I love you

she was right i saw her msg on the board ,it's JQ-lin msg board.
and i just notice it ,

that days i went to ....
I went to clubbing at barcelona lo 10 oc enter JQ-lin , Shui , Aki were there , they bring me in and i did not paid a sigle sen haha due to it's ladies night, they called me go since long time ago but i feel like not going because i don't really like drink and drive but this day i did , because she called me go and i promissed one day ago when we having tea . ok i'm suprize that sharon FFKed US X D and this is the first time i went with my food to barcelona.. ok kinda of fun but i make a move at 1oc actuly i'm damn hungry that why i leave , before that i dranked 4 glassed of hard liqure so went off 1 oc with poan , i'm driving and same goes to poan.Then i went to taman sea to find mengz for burger haha drink gay2lat and have 2 burger as usual then went off at 2 oc and guess what when i reach home suprize that uncle ben car were parking at the side of my house that junction , don't know leh weird i told him i went out to clubs @@ then he did not call me and msg me he just park there and on his laptop in his car, wei wei uncle ben action too weird leh... what the hell...Aiks then i park my car at my house then i walk near his window and knock his door... he shocked that i knock his door and he winded the window down and guess what he said hei sam so NGAM 1 haha i just passing by stop by see you were here anot.... Eh uncle i told you i went to clubbing wor , he said huh ya meh haha forget , he look drunked swt no comment then i ask meh si? he said want tea? then i tell him eh i drive better la you like drunk... he said eh ok ok you drive , then drive to kelana jaya mcdonalds at first he said eh i think we go beer ok mo eh i guess actuly i'm ok because 4 cups of that hard liqure i think it's over de haha so went to nearby 7 11 and bought 6 small bottle or beer lo haha then drink in his car and talk ...... look at the sky and talk he started to question weird things, one more things he freak me out sam actuly i know today you will leave the club early , shocked me i ask why? he said ermm because you sure din go ate your dinner before you go to club, swt i said ya... yerr uncle you know too much la don't jaga me la haha i scare 1 you know you treat me like that ,talk talk talk until 5 oc.. then he send me home and he's ok after few hours of chilling , now me start to get blur haha cos when he ask me qustion i keep drink beer avoiding , actuly i don't think he pass by to my house and also the food things i don't think actuly he know ( actuly i ate some food and went to club just to fill in the answer only sorry uncle ben don't ment to do that but you should know that answer it's a lie rite i know you come for a reason that why i just answer you ya.)so don't worry about that i still don't get what is going on with him last time i help him working that time he also seldom find me since i quit that job yet he keep call me back for part time or what also good la as long you help me he said. I always think i'm not so good you can find better person what ,why me?

sometimes i really don't know what makes him want me help him, that day beer time with him i guess i know abit of the answer due to the person that he hive most of them are geting gready at the money that why he don't like , all things i just guess because that day he show me his laptop sale rate it's drop like shit and the hit rate are not even my 30%... i figure how those guys survire then uncle let me see the account ...woot not even earning but why the money is out and the rate of that were... i guess i know what happend.I just guess he did not tell me...i hope i was right as i told him i'm a good guesser X D. so yeah ....

it's saturday morning 11 oc i wake up and called poan he were asleep yet mengz FFKed us the 2nd times 1st is the barcelona 2nd is omar N-gage weeding ... aiks 12 oc went to kepong there omar always said wrong direction !!! he missed 2 trafic light and lucky poan listen to me haha then we went to the place guess what i saw karen , eh for the truth karen for me is like a diffrent world people she a lawyer in future i guess and i don't really like to talk that much when they have too much facts in thier converstation i'm like lost weh ... ok ok fine fine then ate lunch at omar house..... around 3 oc like that we ciao to ss3 poan send me home and i fell a sleep after he send me home ... actuly 5 oc poan called me but my phone silent haha can't contact me so he give up me and he goes to sell him mp3 to some people dealing at kl sentra.sorry la bro tired wednesday nite clubbing friday whole day assignment .... tired .... not enought sleep friday still going out late till 4 oc to watch foot ball ...that why saturday afternoon tired lo haha ....
nothing much lo wake up also 7 oc de lo aiks then play on9 games for awhile , 9 oc i was asking them where to tea due to i eat KAKI !!! swt mum said dowant cook that why i waited and i ask them where to tea den they said go to KIT house that ok lo haha cos it's his brother Birthday 21th ... ate few things there lo then 12 oc like that ss3 gang called me said FEI CHAI WANT TEA ... i guess i don't wish to talk much to him beacause sometime i really hate him when he talks ALWAYS USE FACT AND PULL PEOPLE DOWN fine i ok with that then he like to compare... lazy said la just some FAILURE I guess when he has frineds he will never call us until he's damn boring.. then he will find us. nothing much it's happy fathers day now haha X D



[URL=http://www.speedtest.net][IMG]http://www.speedtest.net/result/284225462.png[/IMG][/URL]

http://www.speedtest.net/result/284225462.png

i guess people just visit they don't read X D

Just doing whatever they want to do to avoid making them mad?
That is no way to have a healthy relationship.
i been doing this since last few week ago and it really show what is a relationship means to me now, i guess there is no meaning to tell it out and it get my answer from the internet so yeah i found another answer here it's "HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP"  can't believe that the answer just pop up into my mind.i just want to tell my pet brother this as in last few days i were trying to tell him this.

i'm sad today for some reason, actuly uncle ben take me to get my medical report aiks again it's sugar level abit normal. For the pass month i've stoping eating junk and stop mcdonals i guess it's not that easy to cure it out , but i guess this is the last time to visit , because actuly it's not that high it's drops but i just scare about it so i'm really sad, uncle ben said > aiks sor chai you done your best and it's normal what don't worry too much you can drink coke don't worry but don't over do it , aiks i don't know i should be happy or sad few month of coke maraton really makes me go crazy . Uncle ben keep tell me don't worry it's normal now it's ok and i keep tell him that i'm not happy with that result he said then what you want 0% ? are you ok anot * get scold @@*
oh oh fine talk with him in the car after that lunch with him. ok ok fine i think i'm to serious about that actuly i can just forget it and eat what i like, or i keep it the old ways. as i was thinking uncle ben said sam you were slim down too fast take care about your health if't not a smart way to slim down like that, all you need now is balance protien so don't choose eat what you have. thinking and thinking then i guess he's right.

Went home ...
small argument with my pet brother,sometimes i don't know it's his fault or mine i've trying to cool down actuly when i talk to him yet he always does that KNS things that make me angry, you have your anger i also have, you been asking me some question i'll been replying to you and you said i never read , the problem is you just judge me from the first sign , i've notice that what i done once wrong it's in your memory, so today argument was so lame... i get what he means and he started to said i've project this and that then get the KNS thing again , this is the secound things that i always want to tell him but can't tell him direct i told mengz and uncle ben about that how could i told him that stright forward, i tried but end result is don't know he get or he just skip that.He's always telling too much thing about his currently rather you know or don't know , it's more easy to get your detail just like that. haiz i guess i should not said that maybe someday i get what it the real meaning is but... nvm since here is a dead place so i no need worry about people to visit here X D i can wrote what i like, actuly i not worry about people to visit i'm just worry when they really read @@ it become shits .somehow i guess i should not tell him the current medical things to him it's good to keep to my self , the infomation is too over for him ...aiks i guess just something wrong i done today.he said my mood were down actuly yes kinda of then he went miaed lately he told me his boss were using his pc,in this kind of situation?
wow what could make me believe?then i on my pda and went to my Girl fren house for a talk and chit chat with her actuly she my normal friends .. just normal no other special relationship
X D until 5 something i went for a walk i walk and walk aiks pain nvm la i've pain enought i need to work it out walk and walk till i stop ok fine i went to basketball court and look for dennis he's actuly there haha glad so some one could fetch me home for no reason.sat down there for an hours then went back home.

I guess most of the people around started to feel that i'm crazy now my phone is still silent until now and those misscalled that i saw were nothing to me.What you do actuly people just appreciate once and not twice,they could said i'm not that kind of people , but if you really see it does...

The real things about it...
Uncle ben acting weird he's visit to me is so pack i don't know what happend and i did ask auntie about that but aiks..... no answer actuly.just avoid !!!
too not to cheat actuly my report said i'm normal as ABC but all i need is to control the sugar and work it out.that's it .i'm just not satify with that report that is i finally get it.
uncle ben ask me sam do you affaid of dying?actuly i tell him eh nope the real reason of dying were something that you have to let it go and it's a faith you can't control.you can't said i want to do this first and do that first when times come means come you can't change. i told him....todays most of the conversations were cold.

The night of 12 oc
i went out with mengz and we heading to mcdonalds have 2 cups of mediam coke light then ate some frieds and 12 pc of nugget and spend 3 hours talking , it's great when after 12 oc my mind always clear after 12oc midnight.actuly the reason i go to mcdonlads is to do my design ideas so i've done .

some happy things i just notice....
my imeem account were a busted X D most of the song i uploads there are people listen and i guess i'm not the crazy one rite...
guess what my pet brother finally notice that playing the old online game was lame , i've told him to quit but what i get was he said" i don't like to do things half" ok fine if you don't want to listen why force ... no meaning right ...so todays he reply in a diffrent ways , oh okie .... i just wounder what makes him change his mind , later i get the answer .

I like to talk at midnight ,
the only 2 person that always talk to me is mengz and uncle ben , afternoon talks were somethings that i din think much i guess or maybe the weather make me feel down.

Sudelly pop ups
my pet brother told me that one of his cousin said that i pull my wallet slow when paying the food or tea-ing , ok ok maybe his cousin were right at some place ,i do take out my wallet slow because i need to open the zip and look for the wallet and open it but nowdays i'm not using wallet , i'm using pouch , frankly i don't have that kind of style that people paid for me because later on people will just gossip about you, that why me and mengz always share , i'm happy some time people paid for me but if it's always , you just made me like some jerk that keep following you for treats , then what happend? i guess problem came .neh the problem just pop up X D.
ok la i'm find with that due to it happend when i going out with uncle ben , the problem of treating is sometime those place are not ment to be paid from me @@ i guess it too expensive i can't paid that but i can share , as i know those people after a certain ages they don't like to share they want to paid all @@ so it's hard to always paid all right like the beer things 1 or 2 jag maybe i can afford but not always rite @@ i have no salary evendo last time i hit the sale rate but it really become history and today the money become mystery ...this is true. Haha for sometimes i really forget to paid back because i always give after , or in the car people doens't see fine lo , i guess i'm not that kind of person that's it.

Stupid mengz said i'm gay , i ask uncle ben before that question he said yes it look gay when you helping 100% like the incident that you fetch your fren to hospital at the midnight...who's that  fella could do that and traval that far to send his fren to hospital?guess i'm doing that it's gay?
uncle said the point of view is when the person you send he will not feel you are gay , until people around start to said you are then you are no matter what you change. i just stoned and said weh really so gay meh if not how ehh @@ can't what people middle of the night pain yet still call him wait until tomorrow morning , i guess i can't tahan that long . uncle ben said yes that true but people said it's a gay way why not the family members fetch him to hosipital? Ehh ehh ehh no idea i just want to help i have no other meaning about that.Uncle ben said why would you care what people said when you are not what you think. ok so i just help what i can if i can't then sorry lo sad weh sometime help people you told them the solution then they din reply at all .. it more like a use weh no thank you never mind yet still got those ABCDEFG words arrr or maybe they don't reply you ... MOST LAME.... it's 5oc @@ i guess it's bed time X D

I quit I lost I realize again

I quit , yes i quit what is going to stop me by the way.
Since you want to lead i'm so happy so now you take the lead and i quit,
it all yours , i'm fine with that guess what it's makes me more happy ,
since you guys really want a positions of it go a head so i no need carry another heavy bag.
i don't want to stick any close with this problems yet stop asking me about it .

People said i have feeling about that but hello i know what's going on so i'm happy that someone take the lead , hell yeah it's the best time to let you see what you said arent there true.

If you can do better then me i guess i'm an idiot doing that much,
but if you aren't you just a jerk that keep talking backstreets rubbish.
i bet you bad and don't beg me back for that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Uncle ben were right the list of people that i mention they really change , and he given me a side bet on few friends of mine i guess he's right sometimes when you stop msg or call them they will just blinked or forget it until you online or maybe you call them up. That makes sence when the msg pop up most of the time is helps or accompany, those that out of the list is limited i do believe that because most of the time those msg that i don't reply my phone will just ring , so else what's going on there?I ain't selfish but when i share i share enought but what does people share ? it's a diffrent story , someday i hope people really change my point view so that i'm wrong at the first place and i'll search for the wrong i did, for all my life i found out what i wrote were correct and it's so damn true.

my Q's
For the person that you msg long enough, or you talk but sudelly that person doens't reply what will you do ?
For the person sat down and said before i won't change after having a girl/boy friends in my life how many are true in that statement that they said?
For the person that always condam the social and things around what have not you change them?
For the person that keep said i'm good or what else the answer is in you, you only cheat yourself am i wrong?
For the person that said my blog are rubbish , i wounder why would you enter at the first place?
For the person that said that i'm emo i guess you were right, but how long do you know me?
For the person keep yapping about me but still they copy the style of bloging like me, so who are you?
For the person that always woundering me , i guess have you woundering your self before?
For the person that they think they know much of themself , so how much you know your self?
For the person that said , they change don't you know?
For the reason they change, you would know better then me,
For the better reason to change because you have you idea.

THAT WHAT IS HAPPENING GET IT?
Hello is there any answer for me?

I lost yes i just lost, lost to an idiots that so hope for a change ,
I believe this lost was a great lost it make sence to lost,
for the first time i knew that was a trap but yet i still jump into it,
and the feeling of mine was oh yes this is the answer i looking for,
this few week i found out many answer and uncle ben do tell me some trick to try it out,
it works weh it's not what you think it's what you realize,
actuly bullshits people are just around you,
yes i saw and i dare to said it out loud!!!!

some people just keep to thier self and they preten they are not.
some people they just tell it out but they doens't do before.
some people they would listen and retell it out and they said it's his statement.
some people said no and it's a yes in thier heart
some people think they are smarts.
some people love to blame people for some reason and they make it a  story.

I remember this at first i thought i was wrong.....it's start like this
he told me that he's doens't do that ,but that time i was telling him that bro we are human and things could change don't tell me that you did not. you can just escape this question when you choose not to answer, But you Filling in the answer and it's a no. that make put you on a list and i would sumarry it , but today someone told me that time you were doing it so what makes sence my friends?


Friends of mine always ask me > Sam what the heck is THING COULD CHANGE in your mouth that you always said?Ok ok i review now it's actuly like this ... I need to give examples, there are 3 kid in the town and they played from young , at the moment they wish that could be brothers forever but until a day has come one of them have another partnet and things change at the moment he spend more time on other place and what he saw was just judge by her and what we told him were bounced out , fine beign a good person doens't have a good return.

Later on i started to said
WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU DON'T SEE....
This is really make sence when i use it i just tell people around and they said you so stupid with this , ok fine since you dones't know what the meaning is i guess getting angry was not i plan so now i tell it here it's better then you said i simply said it, it means what you actuly see in the front actuly it's not true... some people would just said obvious is like that .... and how do you use it? it's actuly depance on what you see and you think that is true in your mind and it's end up it's wrong, there are examples that i show my msn display picture. people ask me what's the picture about , i told them it's what you see and what you don't see some of my friends they found it cool and they have thier own piece , it's a head of mine  it's my full face was taken in 45degree and i combine it into one and it looks that are 3 heads and actuly it's 2 head one on the left and on the other side.People copy my idea and they start making fun of it but do you realise that it's has a wounderfull meaning in the picture and people would said i know it's a head but where is your nose and mouth? it's actuly there.

YOU JUST DIN SEE IT.

I FINALLY FOUND 1 ANSWER THAT I ASK !!!!

less start on friday night ok it's like this mengz msg me at 2 oc midnight and told me that saturday are going to waterfall so he said ii'm picking up you at 6 30oc in the morning i was like huh what the hell ... means i no need sleep lo... because my uncles comming back from pub ask me for tea nearby my area lo aiks 3 oc at the midnight and talk to them la ... stupid uncles keep ask me those question lucky i know how to escape haha after tea for 2 hours i guess i can't really sleep much leh sien jor la,
went back home also 5oc morning lo aiks then sleep lo lucky mengz 7 oc only called me wake up at least i still got 2 hours to sleep then waited 10 to 20 min lo he reach then NAIK KERETA haha... go to cheras to pick up one of his friends .. we reach waterfall there about 10 oc  , 300+  steps to reach the middle of the waterfall, then went home around 2oc quite long haha and manny stories, then went to PJ KFC and have out lunch ... and then went to ss2 find GOLD shop haha to sell gold.. then went to ss3 giant , then ioi mall find mei kwan for dinner and movie haha.
after movie went back to ss2 tea then go home bath and sleep .

Moment at the waterfalls
Mengz > wah here the sand don't know got gold anot 1 leh
Chu hang> ya lo maybe got leh you see the sand blink blink
Fready> where got one if got manny come here dig.
Me> ermm no comment la ^play water here water very cold^

Chu hang > eh meng less go up there see got more blink blink things anot...
Mengz > ermm ya weh more high more  blink blink things weh ok less go sam you want follow?
Fready> eh i lazy climb la so freaking high
Sam> ehh lazy la don't want la you go la i want to jaga bag haha

Chu Hang and Mengz went up and i was playing water and stones ......
fready also play with me .....

hours of playing stone and water fready said weh weh sam sam you see don't know this is the diamond anot ... i said where got such think if got also not your turn la haha
then fready sudelly remove one stone on one floor then sudelly GLUP !!!! wah got a lubang !!!!!! people covered the hole swt swt aiks don't care la then i go remove the dry stone ... about ermm
quite long la then i sit on the water and dig dig dig wah many small frogs haha came out @@ i guess those hole are the frogs lives....then i change place .. this place full of stone shit weh ....so i remove it to anoter side while i remove to anoter side the ground is left sand and water i sudelly touch something .... !!!!!!!!! as my feeling i touch > i said eh why this stone got lubang 1 @@ so weird 1 then i pick up and see wow GOLD RING FREAKING THICK WEH !!!!.....then i told fready oie you see what i found @@ he said OIE WTF sure is gold arr ... i said wah sure leh 
i also can't believe this place really got gold take 1 wor @@ after few min Chu Hang and Mengz climbing  down and he said we found alot BLINK BLINK and i tell him i FOUND GOLD RING HAHA he don't believe and he try make bangkok it swt him la he always like that , then he later only he start to said weh serious is gold lai geh leh .... i said weh weh i think better sell it off i don't feel safe to keep this ring that why afternoon go ss2 then giant then ioi mall .. finally we sold the RING .....at IOI mall haha.


At IOI Mall
wow yeah you know what we sold the ring RM400, haha then mei kwan was working at IOI mall then ask her for dinner actuly at first she don't know what happend and we all though the ring are around RM200 only then while the uncle told me RM400 shocked and we just ask for cash,
after that we all are damn hungry leh at first mei kwan said she damn long din eat pizza then i said ok lo i paid haha X D then then change mind to sushi king wow ok la fine it's not my money so spend it to share ba....

At sushi king
we went in and sat down then ... start our maraton haha i said eh NO NEED SEE THE PLATE COLOR LA EAT WHAT YOU LIKE CALL WHAT YOU WANT LA.... CHU HANG was figure to called set i said aiks don't call set call sushi or other things since got ppl cheng no need safe haha call only .... 15 min later we ate like monster haha and we were happy , we all said 1st time got people cheng never said EAT WHAT YOU LIKE haha ... this time serious happy weh haha. after dinner Mei Kwan need go back to work cos now is her break time until 7 30 so she go back work we still chill there and talk lo ... damn full haha we count the plates wahh 38 plates manny expensive colour but don't have blue haha.

MY W850I!!!!
went to arcard lo and play the prize machine 30 min at there ....i change few dollar and play and the last chance was like this 1 more hit i get the price .... then FREADY sudelly PIAK THE TABBLE !!!!!! @@ -4 !!!!! wtf !!!!! my W850i !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! arrrr he too early press and he terpress my button !!!! aiks nvm la then go popular walk walk and see see cos we heading movie at 10 oc  read and read laught and laugh haha ....

AT THE CINEMA
wow SO COLD LEH !!!!!!!!!!we having KUNGFU PANDA at our screen haha ....keep laught lo haha until end .


I REALIZE....
i found out what the truth of laughing , serious you think what normal what people laught like macam entertain or make it that way acting la haha . no i found out what is ture laughing is haha the whole day after findin that ring was a hell lots of smile !!!!and i paid for the sushi is worth .. everythings to me is something so now i know what i been looking for and the answer pop up to me YES I FINALLY FOUND ONE ANSWER AND IT NOT FROM PEOPLE THINKING .
Now i know why Uncles like to paid the bill not because he's rich he's looking for joy and smile and i know why they found me for a reason now i finally get the answer and not i'll appreciate haha hell yeah this is what i know by my own on this day weh it's not a fake things , my dad told me there is no free lunch at this world but some how i believe that he's worng sometimes , but now i know i'm totally wrong it's true , mater or fact it's you get or you just don't get it.Uncles now i know why you guys like to find me haha , it's this the reason? never mind if it's not haha as long i think that way was this .

Things i found was my luck,
People doens't fake out when they in suden situation,
Money that i use was a joy of happiness,
there is too much joy for the past days....

today my last words X D

i may not be around ,
so don't worry about me X D < i'm still smilling ya
i been waiting for this time ,
it come jor lo it's my time to go,
so don't worry about me ok,
no need sms me or call la ,
i will call you ok X D.

as long i'm smiling means i'm ok ya X D
i just been to a place that is suit me.


~~~~~
that post were booked to let me reply this X D
3 uncles come and find me after this post they were keep asking those question that i was avoiding but i know they did not ask in purpose cos they half drunked .. don't know where they from la , i did not pick up thier phone early because haha my phone was in the drawer and it's silent woooooo haha X D ...

The talk about the converstation.....

Uncle> eh sam when you finish study arr....
2+ years lo why neh ....
Uncle> haha icic eh sam how is your new relationship ...
i still puting afford to her but don't know leh she sometime choi me sometime like aiks or maybe i  din 100% focus on her gua ...
Uncle>  eh what happend to you like changing or you got other target.
maybe
Uncle> sam what do you think if i get a kid now?
erm not a problem to you gua what you worry.....
Uncle> i scare my i don't know how to teach
don't worry ok as long you don't always compare with other people kid cos my mum last time always compare me with other that why make me feel useless...
Uncle> if don't compare today you won't be what you are, am i wrong
rrrrrrrr
Uncle> that why i don't know how to teach if i got 1.you see you where also got friends and you know how to manage your friends well .
uncle don't worry i'm here i can help ok don't worry haha your son will as naughty as me ...

something like that looo
but something that i din said much here X D
cos i don't like that topic

it's a gay day X D

what days was it , since i been silent my phone this kind of feeling is hard to find yet i hope sometimes are like this, few friends of mine they thought i'm in deep shit they just check out with me when they saw me online, yet my phone is full of misscalls "MY BAD!!!! haha" i got my own time doing my thing .

few days ago , my pet brother were finding me , that time i was doing other things i guess they saw i online i guess but i'm using my mobile to on, later on he told me something in that conversation i some how feel that aiks , i just dowant to care about the game stuff anymore , matter of fact i played sometime but if you telling me i just can't make conversation so i just tell him stright forward, do you know sometimes i don't talk things like "WAH REALLY ARR YOU GET THIS ARRR GENG LA YOU" hello come on that was damn entertaning , i'm just dowant to make my self like a clown and sometime i hope i can make them happy, but it's so fake in life would you cheat your friends what you think about that, weird things they would want you to know aiks ok ok chill.

i don't want to said things that you like to hear,
and you should know why i did that,
i want to let you know that is something is not true,
but the truth is the things that actuly most of the people are entertaing you,
so if some one pop up and tell you "eh what , then?, it doens't affect me"
all sort of things like that,
you started to think people anti you and you are going crazy angry,
come on  if you would want to listen what your heart want to hear,
fine i think i should prise you like hell,
make you like NO.1 and you would  feel better,
i just can't stand that ,
it's a fake relationship.

i would just face the fact and let you know that i'm not into it.
if you can't stand it letting it go i would just search for another one.
i just can't keep telling people that , yet it's so annoying when you tell people about that.

~~~

early in the morning today my phone beep 3 time it's my arlam ok i wake up and pack my bag 1st then i went to sleep again, due to i set the time is  8 45oc and my class is at 11 oc,3nd wake up at 10 oc went to bath and rush to college reach there around 11oc sharp
went up shit no people in class i though class cancel
just as i thought people start comming in chey i though i very late.

went back home lunch and have joy with FRIENDS haha dota whole day at the cafe full of joy X D we scolding each and other at the end we still laugh, aiks actuly we love to scold each other with smile it's a kind of fun when we do stupid things yet sometime words are sharp but just accept it ba haha and it's better we listen it and we listen what people said and we could accept it in a better ways X D, steven always called me for dota we not playing offen but sometime we played 1 game then went home haha today diffrent he sms me and ask me so i said ok lo haha. because usally i went to cafe that time always in time meet him then we play. most of the time one game then we ciao for dinner ...

tired..

sometime i just let it go, i give up leh
i serious give up weh , today they called me for help.
i did not help i walk always , and i tried to appreciate,
and also letting go...

as i mention i din't pick up my phone people are so stress out haha , since they said who you think i am ... from my back now let them tried what they said ... don't bullshiting with me.until now i still put my phone in my drawer... seldom on my msn lol X D kinda YES that kind of feeling haha.

that it's X D

i just can't F***** sleep

it's 3 oc i can't sleep anyway, but i just woundering things i just left go it really helps haha don't think that is a bad things haha ... guess what now only i remember what my mum tell me in the mornining he told me not to drive on this week because she said i might have accident i believe what she said actul because she won't hurt me i guess , sometimes she did but nevermind she is my mother haha, sometimes she is great but sometimes she not.

what can i said i just notice that friends of mine they msg and me and i was very happy , X D.
actuly there is nothing about it , for the pass 1 hours ago there are few people msging me that is mengz , deetee , sam , pz , and most shocking is gurl msg me haha X D. nothings much just chat lo .

aiks so sad weh 321 jor i still can't sleep, aiks what to do who call me sleep just now haha X D.
my friends were very angry about that case which i don't pick up the phone and reply the msg,
woot nevermind this show how a person can tahan ... if you so fast give up how about me?don't want to think about that ....

look at the bright side ,
people maybe go and people came,
things you change is just what you want to change,
the faith you pick is what you want to do go on,
five things that you never think of it,
you change,
you are sad,
you are too happy but don't know how to share
you are bored and you start pressing the msn list pop up and hope some one chat with you.
actuly you were nothing .

Maybe they can't tahan that yet why should i tahan them,
They got problem only find me, so how about i got problem,
who's helping me yet i telling you, you just give me yes ..huh ,
and all entertaining words... what for i tell you.

that time i was sad really sad why is the one who called me?
not even a sigle friends called me but strange called and ask ,
do you know when you hear those blessing words how you feel?
it's so happy to hear that you know not just woundering and pretening,
yet they said we are brothers , now i ask what's brother for?
it's for use , for chilling, for drinking tea or what shit?
i've ask why would you want that tittle for me , yet what you guys said?
i just can't imagine what are those ?
entertaining? huh bull shits?
I still remember that but did you guys rememeber,
at the night who said hungry and need someone to accompany?
and who is driving? have you ever think of that .
today you sudelly called and ask me for something come on,
brother doens't use like that ok you know i don't like that why still approach me?
i've tell you i have limits of tolerate ok.
just don't let me tell you in my mouth ,
if that happend you and me are in distance.
so sorry i can't accept that anymore don't called me if you think i'm badly wrong.
if you called make sure don't ask me do somethings because i fed up to help .

PEOPLE DON'T APPRECIATE HELP AND YET THEY KEEP ASKING FOR HELP.
I SAW A MSG OF HELP AND I'M SICK OF IT.
SO DON'T THINK I'M NOTHING WHEN I DON'T TELL YOU
SAYING IT WAS MY LAST WORDS TO THIS RELATIONSHIP.

Weird mood X D

we took a walk up the street,and picked a flower and climbed the hill above the lake.
And secret thoughts, were said aloud. We watched the faces in the clouds, til the clouds had blown away
and were we ever some where else you know it's hard to say
And I never saw blue like that before.
Across the sky, around the world.
You're giving me all you have and more.
And no one else has ever shown me how
to see the world the way I see it now,
oh why, I never saw blue like that
I can’t believe a month ago,
I was alone I didn’t know you,
I hadn't seen,
or heard your name.
And even now,
I’m so amazed it's like a dream
it's like a rainbow,
it's like the rain.
And some things are the way they are and words just can’t explain
And I never saw blue like that before across the sky, around the world.
You're giving me all you have and more.
And no one else has ever shown me how
to see the world the way I see it now, oh why, I never saw blue like that before
And it feels like now, and it feels always, and it feels like coming home
I never saw blue like that before. Across the sky, around the world
You're giving me all you have and more.
And no one else has ever shown me how to see the world the way I see it now,
oh why, I never saw blue like that before Oh why I never saw blue like that

Today i'm heading some weird mood, i left all my phone at the room and i just walk away i'm not emoing so , i did that i left my phone at my drawer and walk aways guess what , i have 22 miss called and 10 sms.. my other phone has 5 sms , and my msn i was offline , why did i do that because i feel that todays was a day that manny people were looking for me, so i just did that ...

I just escape some sort of things in my life would be a great or faith.

people are geting angry with me i've no idea, when i looking for them they were somewhere else X D but if one day i'm totally gone what do you think this could happend?I'm giving all but who's giving in?

i told most of my friends people would change somedays , you will never be the same what you did before and now it's totally diffrent so why would you granted your words, i've seem most of the people beside me change , some change for girl friends
some change for money reason , some change for no reason, and manny more friends of mine they would said no i won't what's changing we are not changing , i just want to tell to all my friends actuly every one change but you just don't notice if you think today i'm wrong , fine make it wrong . i'll never fix it until i figure out i'm really wrong.

too all my blood brother and all my darlings i hope you understand me.
i wish to tell but i guess i let you guys figure out is better then i tell.


Lucky she did not msg me ,i feel bless X D

What you want to know?

Uncles i'm very happy going out with you guys but, sometime i'm not into that kind of situation so please understand.they fetch me out and have a happy hour drink near by uncle jimmy house , i was wounder why they looking for me so urgent.. until i found out something is not right,it's not a bad and it's not a good thing aiks dowant said that it's PNC stuff ... all i can said is why want blame other peoples when you doens know your self that well and you keep said that you know your self well fine i dowant argue, uncle ben i really cannot tahan that guy talk sometime, but lucky it's not my case it's his personal things , early i told you all no one believe me aiks just sometimes want to listen or not up to you guys.

uncle ben fetch me on the afternoon but auntie was not there so i din ask uncle ben about that , then went to uncle jimmy house and went out for beer wow guess what i saw that guy ... neh nvm forget it just drink and sat down and talk.... and talk...
auntie sudelly came in i was shocked uncle ben did promiss me he bring auntie come haha he did that @@ but .... auntie leave very early i din ask why go so early...
then talk talk talk ..... so long and so manny jag @@. they send me home and i went out with my friends again for tea.

i'm happy because ben came and fetch me , and i can see your wife and talk to her when i hear the things that i dowant to hear from that guy, Uncle ben you give me a promiss you bring her out yes you did it, but in my case i can't do that i'm very sorry due to i'm still on the string and yet you should understand.

DON'T BLAME PEOPLE PLEASE....
if you don't know what's going on why not ask, i just want to shoot that uncle ben stoped me, lucky you next time you won't be that lucky. sometimes i smile doens't mean i'm happy, some people just see what they see (it's the truth).

Uncle ben just want me to be happy since he ask me about the two girl things... well i guess it's better they found someone so i'm would not struggle in middle.well i told him what actuly happend but i did not tell to my close friends because they won't understand what is that ... what is means... so they would think other things.
after telling uncle ben that, he pull me to another tabble and sat down he ask me manny question and tell me alot of stuff.I'm suprize that he worry about me i though he was worry about his share and his business only ...he understand me well so i just tell him what happend , aiks for my close friends i told them they would just said i'm a playboy or what shyit so i don't manage to tell them 100%, sometime my friends they think they really know me well when i ask what colour i like, how manny number i have and how much i spend on mcdonlads they would just ar ar ar erm .....
answer are everywhere and all are not the correct one.sometimes i just talk to older people because they understand why this could happend and why i did that, but some older friends of mine they still in the level of thier own, i would not tell them because they make me feel, what they said and what they do are diffrent, one of mine older friends said sam don't do that again, ok i stop shoot around , but you keep continew what the hell is going on , don't use your age and talk to me i don't fucking like that ... and if you don't know how to respect me yet don't talk to me , you think you sudelly pop in FAUL words is funny? the most i hate was when they need the fucking help they could just call me help help i need help , when i'm not helping they give me funny expresion , wahh i own you guys? sometimes i wish to turn all things off i'm sick of helping and chating with those people who want to talk like that ....just sad if we were close enought i think we should have more respect to each other , does it means if we are close enought we can talk rude and i can simply open your drawer and see for your secrets? if that happend i guess i dowant to be that close i would just keep a distance , and i still get my respect back.

Uncle ben if next time i get a suprize call from you i know what it means,can i preten not to pick up?if you doens't see me on9 at the moment don't worry. i'm ok and i'm very healthy.

can't escape haha YOU ARE DAMN RIGHT haha

aiks sometimes i guess uncle ben were right.. last night i really do nothing,
but i went out with her at asia cafe ,just chilling ...uncle ben haha guess what
you were right maybe the food does make me stick at home.

haha i'm serious free after 6oc Uncle ben i guess you were right. i ain't hiding just doing something new haha.

Uncle ben haha i hope tonight i saw your wife, aiks why don't you get 1 kid weh.
i wanted to ask this question but you always avoid me so i escape this question.i think i should not busy about this case rite? walk away haha.

i'were boring after comming back from tea , want to sleep but i can't give up with it haha so so so went outside at the road and walk up and down haha, i should call uncle ben early and follow them aiks haha , but dowant la they make me hyper weh haha
like crazy guy... haha but enjoy it ofcus but haha i just want to change ya ...
since i already booked by them tonight i guess i can't escape...(don't know uncle ben call anot haha) if he call i think it's a long talk haha.

No time entertain haha

Uncle ben > samson tonight free?
eh what's is going on later?
Uncle ben > want bring you out for tea with Jimmy..
ha want meh , i got tea i think tonight.
Uncle ben > how about saturday?
eh what's going on you want to find me that urgent?
Uncle ben > something to ask you about your life.
what the...
Uncle ben > come out uncle miss you , haha serious we want to talk to you.
ermm i let you know later ok?but can let me know is that all about?
Uncle ben >No , what you did last 2 week?
huh what you mean i don't get it.
Uncle ben > you got time?
sort of but i 2 30 i need go to college.
Uncle ben> well those of your i saw on the streets with other men.
hmm i give up den, why?
Uncle ben > oh ic why din not tell me ?
aiks not big things what what for tell you.i tog you only worry at your $ haha.
Uncle ben >sure anot, sometimes only k, so what's next?
i just got 1.
Uncle ben > ... is that so fast ? you said diffrent things.
i could not reject people sms me 1 rite?
Uncle ben > true also....this time fish or food?
fish i don't think so i think food.
Uncle ben >eh i need to back to work.see you later , i know your are damn free after 6 oc don't avoid us ok.
No la i want stop going out like that leh...tonight really can't.
Uncle ben > you scare your new food?
you back to work la i free i let you know ok.
Uncle ben > you you you ....ok den make sure you call us if not cut your head...
haha ok ok saturday lo den...call your wife out hehe i long time no see her haha.
Uncle ben > you sure? then i want see food.
Woii can't make it....
Uncle ben > can't make it too
yerrr like that 1 wor... jar 2 like the i saturday i think i not free also.
Uncle ben > shit ...traped
hahahahahahaha .... gg.go do your work la ... 2 oc de la no more rest for you...
Uncle ben > OK make sure you call us saturday ok, tonight we heading to somebody house to talk if you free then you come over ok, or you let me know i fetch you.
eh ok ok i see how ok.same time?
Uncle ben> haha ya ya i got to go den.
see you den...

WEIRD UNCLE BEN LOOKING FOR ME .....
what could it happend ?
haha i think he just miss me talking i guess.

tired ....low power

11 oc to 12 oc was my class after that ... faster start our work... then do do do until 8oc went out with Edmondson he played his bowling while i with Justin went to arcade and have some fun.went to asia cafe to have my dinner reach home 12 oc bath then sleep...(actuly i met a girl at arcard and i her number X D don't angry ya it's just my culture to making friends.)

one tired day until she sms me I'm still sleeping,just too tired... i has no voice to talk i'm very quite after 11 oc , it's another kind of feeling how long i 've miss this feeling ...


I'm sorry i din reply your msg
but if you see this please forgive me,
I'm tired , but i guess i will msg you in the morning,
please understand OK.

i did not talk much yesterday,
my bottle were empty,
i have no more energy,
but never mind I've try.

"There's not another girl that could satisfy my needs."
thank you for letting me knowing you,
and the msg you send me ill keep it.
don't bump my life with suprize.

Just anoter day with it....

The joy that he has ,
the pain that he carry,
the smile that we see,
the voice of his,
his personality are gone,
he just another person.

Sorry that i'm late, things would happend that sudelly.
why ? i have no idea....
just want to forget it.


they were chilling on yesterday night with me,
uncle jimmy haha weird that day , just want to ask him what happend,
but i forget, they chill with me i was very happy, thanks for the time
and moment you all share with me.. but i have to go , i just go sorry
uncles...

moment of me today.... i was awake but it's still pain, i've taken some pain killer ... it's usefull? the days was long... then pain was there,is happy to see what i done in the afternoon but it's sad that i came back home with that .. my left leg angle still pain... just pain.


the days was long but it's not stoping me
i'll go on and walk as far as i could,
but if one days i just stop,
i won't blame anyone beside me,
i would just blame it on me.

after giving up this friendship i feel that pain are around there things are not so happy as i thought, what's wrong ... just woundering what could that be?it been a while to let me think and do things are enought for me .just said good bye and never saw a tear in the eye.walk aways with invisible pain, who know about that leting it go is easy but memorys are still here can't let it go.

*i had enought of helping it's time to let my time to rest, never see a blue in the sky it's changing, earth quake came sudelly.People just want to have a hope why does the sky change? people are so sad tear are around the world how would you see, people never drop a tear by reading it but people drop tear when they saw it.i do believe that beacause i'm passing by the case i saw, things would change after you looking at it , people reading it would just said it's so sad about that but how sad it's the ture? i'm serious tired of helping people around me , sorry to said that...


NOW
i'm tired now ,
i'm waiting just waiting,
waiting for the calls that i waiting,
but it's riging?
does it beep?
it's late...
i still give a hope to that,
why aren't things happend like that.

A chilling tuesdays

i was dreaming,the dreams about the hidden secret about that, guess what i see , i see them in my gallery but it's too late amd i doing the correct things?

******** DREAMING ...... continew, it happend like i was at that situation, sad down obsess erm but why things dream 2 time in same time but diffrent action...that is what just happend...i was middle of the selection (SHIT SELLECTION) haha don't worry this time i choose to not to choose that why i give up all.....things linked to this i found that soul in my house it's was an eye ball that i never notice that, it's right under my fucking bed,
that things could probly talk and it's waiting for die.. that things doens't bring goods to us so i was wanted to kill this monster, my mum was stoping me he told me much things...
about that.. then i just told her it's no longer use here so let me destroy it...
she let me go and i just kill it ... and i was send to a place ... weird things just weird
i can't see but i can hear the tick of the clock, i can't see a things den .... a voice told me it's your time sam, i'll send you there...sudelly a beep of sound wake me up at the same time that clock ticking just stop ...damn what is it suppot to mean?
i've no idea that why just a dream i guess..


I wake up at 9oc , bath and rushed to school 9 30 class, i though i was late i reach school around 945 lecturer haven came... lucky me i escape... went to a quite boring but intresting class,end at 12 30 went to Face To Face to had out lunch there, great food and good serving, after lucnh went to class at 1 30 ... next class is 2oc was thinking who could that be , our first class on our 3rd week.aiks no comment eh.he's a good talker as in his age , suprize he just 27yo class end at 4 went home ....reaching home about 4 30
was chating with him and her .. look at the stupid sky it's turned black again i feel it
the pain was sudelly appearl... just as i thought about that, i went out for pasar malam walk at 5 something (planing to go cyber cafe) but i'm thinking if i go what to do?
neh so just walk around and buy some stuff went home to eat, about an hours i been walking around pasar malam that make my leg abit ok the pain was not there but still pain , the right leg ok now come the left leg ... aiks never mind went home and eat most of the food i bought ... then i watch cartoon less then 10 min i fall asleep on the sofa. about 9 30
she sms me and have a chat between the time 9 30 to 10 i was in the toilet doing my things haha. i leave her alone den .and he sms me so i waiting for him to come ...went out for a drink den back home around 12 ... i going out with uncle they all , they just called me...
went out with them talk around and not much things i guess.. then went home .


It's good to have pain,
but it's bad to have the memory,
the picture keep showing how it happend,
and i can't even think of that ...

sometime things do come in a pack,
what makes me said that ,
it's beacause i'm having all things crashed in one day,
yet people are not going to believe that ,
if so so they believe ,
i'm happy with that,
somtime things just come they just fucking come,
i have no idea it's like a movie screen,
but hell yeah it's a fucking life,
and it's just happend....
what they said ?
fake .... making storys
the best things that i never share with them,
it's waste of time,
but it's better i text it out,
so things could let me feel better,
but not you all,
it's for my self.

i'm beign too tired

sunday it's actuly a family day?
it's a day with joy and things to share with family?
it's a day that you can see them a very long time?
or maybe that was what i'm not having.
a voice wake me up,
and they just give me some cash,
yet the left ,
i'm sad and i was hoping to going out for a dinner of what else,
they just change,
they have more important things to do,
that was a day someone was asking me,
*sam normally how do you get your dinner , with your family.
i'm very obsess about that, yet he just ask.i told him with a sob heart and i keep my tears
*but i'm not like you i have the most day dinner with my family.
things just getting me around, i can't take it by the way i just walk away.it's was lucky that my tear fall off after someone show ups.

i just can't take it,
for the last time ,
i never think of it,
not even thier smile,
thier face or what else,
but all i know is money,
i would just show up when i need them,
but i did realize that,
i'm over do that,
that why i made a change,
they can't make the change,
and now i understand,
he were right,
why does they want to do that,
it's to get more for you,
it's you,
all in my life untile now i realize that,
things are just like that,
as simple as that,
but how manny people out there they know,
it's a sum........

I sleep too early i've no idea,
Just too early,
maybe my body has signal to me,
and i need to recover it back.

early in the morning ,
things goes so slow i have no idea,
it's monday?
it's later i got class?
hell yeah i guess it's true,
doing those art piece with joy,
went to college,
ops it's 5.30 time to go back,
things are just similar ,
aiks......

look at the sky it slowly turn dark,
but what am i doing there?
doing nothing i guess,
slacking for the few damn hours,
woot then sound became slient,
guess it's another day pass....

todays

the beep wakes me up,
i look at the clock,
it's 9 oc and it's time,
time to go field trip,

i finally found the answer,
i've share with few person in my life
though of sharing it was hard to accept
but things just done.

The answer that i spoken they just accept me
and i'm very sorry about that , since things
should not go like this let's end it wickly
i was suprize that they accept my answer, and
left me, it's painful , or just memories.

I'm happy now so are they?
i'm happy that i can run abit longer
i'm happy that i can drive the car i never though i can
i'm happy that i having a day out with friends
i'm happy that manny people message about that

But

i'm sorry that i do this sellection
i'm sorry that i din send you sms
i'm sorry that i really can't go on
i'm sorry about that.....

thanks for the support

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2in 1ship

Things just stucked todays,
i just don't want to face it,
i've tell them about this,
they said i'm wrong,
since i admin that i'm wrong,
else i can do?
all i want was a things,
but things become more problem,
i never thought that could be a problem,
until i found that.

i've learn before, but i just forget,
i promissed to them, but i forget it,
i'm to emo , they said yes you are,
why are you like that, because i fall again,
the same old trick that i did,
i thought i can master it but things doens't go well,
there is nothing to master in life,
i'm just overexpected about that,
i hope that was somethings,
but things are going crazy,
i thought she give me up,
i was wrong at the 1st place,
things are just started to accept,
shit..now i get two acception,
in one same time,
i've think to go on with 2,
but as i think and think,
i've face the fact,
yet now i'm rejecting it all,
too keep it has no meaning anymore.

things are not that fun,
what people said are diffrent,
they do have a mind to slove it,
but not me,
i watch the movie,
i listen to the song,
it's help me up,
and i really think i should stop,
not hiting the end was something,
why aren't you happy with what you got.

Uncle ben i was wrong and i hurt my feeling

the morning breeze,
the wind blow and the sunshine,
look at the sky ,
they turn dark,

a sents of smelly ,
a noise of beep ,
a hunger of the thumy,
there is no longer asleep,
therefore i'm just awake.

last night.
i read the book ,
it told me and show,
things that you never think of it,
that is what was it,

guess what i think is what i get,people around me are telling liar.
things that i expected were right, i'm not wrong but i guess now i
know why i have to stand alone and leave them.

firstly i thought i was wrong ,but finally i guess no longer
i've found the answer today.and don't think i'm wrong at the moment.
people just don't want to hurt you feeling sam ,
you choose to stay why go?
i thought i'm wrong , but no i'm no longer wrong.
i told uncle ben about this he said this is just a another hidden secret.
at first i told him that what happend... he seem told me about it are you sure?
and he reply if there is nothing about it why hold on?
at that moment i guess that he's so damn wrong.
and he told me sam listen to me we are human we want what we want they want what they want that why we got the deal and so do they.
2oc i msn uncle ben and i told him this, he said haha guy what kid evendo we adult
tell lie... sam don't worry about that just another hidden secret you found as you tell me before secret were never a secret it's waiting for discovery. i guess what i said is so damn right.I hope i follow my feeling that time.
uncle ben told me manny things once it's start it will never stop until the problem came, i ask uncle ben were you a liar? he told me yes i'm but i ask back why are you telling me those? he said he sam what did you know ? you also been a wild guy since you got that job. i told him that yes i'm... and i really tell him what happend... he just said sam sam do you know what you tell is what we do what you see is what you don't see and it's all from your head. i get scold sudelly.

uncle ben was so caring about me , thanks for the caring uncle ben .... since you are a liar what if one day your grow up child ask? will it still a lie? he reply to me and said liar and never stoping have you see a thief stop stealing when they never get caught? if there were change how manny are they... WOW uncle ben you so into me i guess i've learn and now i know why uncle ben love to read my rubbbish haha people around me said it rubbish and i only found few people keep support me that is uncle ben , got 1 UK and 2 euro country ip they were always here i guess nvm if you really want to make rubbish with me so on i would happy to do that but....

uncle ben said don't judge your wrong sam , in my eye you were never wrong, you help me about the market things it's going so well don't you notice, i giving you the amount of money into you bank is a right answer,you always said you might be wrong but how manny wrong did you done.since i know you so long what make you mistake? it's the relationship?, itzzit the things you let if too easy? or maybe aren't you that careful anymore?

i just give him the answer.
he was shocked to listen to that... and he said sam it's a learning process don't worry it could be anythings, why are we old junks so experience? just because we hit too much naik and we try to pull it out,everythings you do you are so currious but why this time no? why no? did you told me that? i have warned you and give you advice about it. things will never be the same so becareful what you having now , i was wrong on you sam i though you never change? but you show me i'm wrong now!
i said uncle ben things i just letting it go doens't means i have no experience in my brain, thought letting go is was so easy but it's not what you think.uncle ben said you said you are unique , i do belive in you sam but what makes you stop?
i told him i was just woundering what's going on this relationship is a LIE.
i see much people den this 1, i never never ever told someone until i meet uncle ben and mengz it's so obvios and it's really a plam life.

Uncle ben said that sam last time you were a legend but you seem legend become zombie
you never work hard i know that and you work very smart, evendo i know how you earn that kind of money but how do you use? you spend all over girl having relaxing? you have what you have your experience are out of the boundries , so things that i don't know but you know evendo i never try before and i learn what you said when we haven beer talk, don't you which who are you now? arent you going back the same road?
i told you before sam exeprience came from money, what ever it take money is a solution , you told me that sam wake up wake up, your words can bring a person thought but , what about you? dime? washer ? liar? wrote and forget? hellow sam
you were somebody else, i'm so upsad that you said i'm worng but never mind i learn
hidden secret were never a hidden secret.

i stone there and kena bombing like that , Uncle ben it's now how you think and what you think i spend those money on girl because i thought it's was fun? and i was trying to exploring how a women feel about a Enrich guy. guess i have enought of that exeprience, i never fall that badly or stupid i should said, but i did.am i too young to do that? or am i too young to fall?

uncle ben said look at you sam , how much did you earn? which stock did you buy? i trusted you and i follow what you take... and guess what i'm not wrong at you and you are not wrong at your self. but this time please figure out why you make the move?yet why are you doing it? are you bad? huh? leaving me here like your not watching?

I'm here uncle ben just happy to know that but i have finish up the fund, it not what i don't want it's what i choose to be what i want to be...i'm doing that because i thought i was wrong , but i give myself a try and it's really get what i
said before so now i learn.

uncle ben said if you never change you have your dream come true, you evo was just a snap for you. don't you see that? i'm happy that you share your info with me and uncle jimmy, jimmy said you were a liar. but i trust you what did i get , i get a price that i never think before.i'm rich now sam i can support you what you want to do as long not the study.

Uncle ben if i were never change today i will never here and i will never learn.evo was my dream but if the dream too fast to let me get it's what happend when i'm 18 that age spending money around with girl club and all kind of shit... i know you rich but uncle ben let me explain this ok i never think about that to stop my study.

Uncle ben said sam what you told me you stress out, you were in 4 job in 1 class and what you did ,did they paid you?

Uncle ben it's not the money facts i'm having what i have , doing a monitor , class raps , a leader , a head project so do i i'm so proud about it uncle ben,if things never happend we will never know, the things that you said you want to invest i told you not so but it's lucky that you listen to me.

Uncle ben said ya sam see just look at me , what i have is what you give, if you were a liar at that time i probly lose a sum of money , i will inverst to you don't worry and lucky you friends don't know that... who you told me and who's that he's a kind 50% sucess or a failure.

Uncle ben sorry i just down break down .what you have is not what i gave you it's a faith to you and letting me to know you at the bar. that time i was sudelly suprize that i found my self so into those uncle but lucky you and uncle jimmy let me know you guys, i really don't get what are't you letting me know you guy you could probly stop me.

Uncle ben said sam they way you look are not they way you are,first met
we really think you are a liar but when somethings that you told about it we went home and try it's a fucking solutions.did you get what i mean?

finally i got the answer that i never ask ,uncle ben you know what 1st time meet you guys i thought you 2 were fisher but not as i'm ..don't worry i know why i'm worth that sum of money thank you so much uncle ben and uncle jimmy.

Uncle ben sam that amount of money is a small sum why are you so appreciate with that use it ... do you know last time that you you would just said this sum of money 1 week i can finish..what happend now?

Uncle ben i live a poor life and i want things change and i get what i want, for the reason i'm not using that much of money beacause of the FUCKING TALK...i have no idea why i been there and i just paid for fun.

uncle ben said you means that program that you told us?therefore this is somethings that make you really special, you went to those programs and you went to chruch and temple what for? don't answer me i know you will tear down later.i know you not well but at least got sometimes.the last time we meet you we were so unhappy that never see your smile uncle jimmy said it's a fake and a liar smile at the first but things went by you really saw and you help jimmy also , uncle old already why i share with you? you should ask why you share with us at the first place? are you trying to get more info about that? but what we give you is what you already have we are empty data.

i guess uncle ben you were right...things that i ask you guys i already done...those please really make my mind change i have no idea... since pass 6 month i change i feel when i do good things all are into 1 pack they really do come to a pack. that why.i quit that job becaause i dowant what i'm having now i feel my self usless and so unpreditedable.... that why i was confuse about that. i never wrote in text because i found out it's not good to share,that why.

uncle ben said eh sam you really change we can see, we love you so much you know if i were your ladies i will die for you.

So do i ... i change . but that sound gay. and i'm not into it haha.... are you drunked only uncle ben drunk he will shoot me like fire and get all my info to here haha.

Uncle ben haha if i were drunk so what? guess you are pretty smart why do you want to waste your tallent?you always said god give you 4 credits hell man, it's nothing to get a 4 credits to you.. you normally failed because you never try or maybe you try you never work it out. you told me kok wai can spend 2 hours reading the book and score A's for the exam how could he do that , sam you knew that answer .


haha yes i knew i knew but but but things that what you see is not that easy,im happy that using web msn to chat with you ,and i 'm doing a copy of what you said.

oh my stupid stuff ... you thinking what ? want to share with you friend ? do you think they really read ? if there would they could be somebody that want to know more about you, never thinks of that?you said what you said you see what you see and you do what you do so what the left over ?

RUBBISH i guess haha those uk ppl send me emails they really like what i wrote i hope i can have another 1k hit haha hope they spread the blog.Uncle ben you no need sleep arrr haha so late.

Wife not at home i can do men's stuff.

Eureka!!!!!!!!!!! shit weh you still can type so long dud.....

why cannot ok i guess it's my enjoyment time see you soon sam , i have what you change is what you want don't screw up , if you were screw up nevermind just do the plan b for you that i told you , please please be my guardians and guard the shop i know you can and you always can....


People see this they would said it's a fake....Uncle ben tai said clearing the account by next week,he told me monday but haha monday holidays so i guess he'll bring forward next week.

ok never mind he called me up today and ask me for a dinner and guess what , he ask me about the 5ball things .. did you gave him?

uncle ben i thog u were doing you things?

Silly money talking is more important!!!

ok ok nope i guess . did you ask him about the contract he seem down want to sign.

sure he don't want to sign .... nevermind sam don't worry he'll clear everythings off as you said he's not that kind of person.

eh i might be wrong uncle ben .

How much wrong is the wrong !!!!!!!!!!you are something and i'm holding everything don't you notice ... ok anythings just meet me up i sure help you out.

thanks for the concern haha but i'm waiting phone come gg if uncle ben can get me that then good.

zzzzzz earn your self stupid fools... who call you buy exeprience .... ok ok i go now


I BELIEVE NOW,
Things that people said may opt yes or no
believer that believe they really believe,
my mind was correct and my heart was wrong,
i gain it back to me but i don't wish to gone wrong again,

FINAllY got it...
JUST TODAY I SEE ALOT OF THINGS.
I'VE FOUND OUT , I HAVE NOTICE
I'M REALLY BLOCKED,HOPE FOR CHANGES BUT HOW MANNYTHINGS CHANGE?
NEH .....

kai yee now i believe that why you so love bloging haha i finally notice that
what i said in here are true and things they call it rubbish it's waiting for recycle .it's a hints to me and a very big thanks to uncle ben...

THE 100 POST ....

Acarophobia -- fear of skin infestation by mites or ticks
Acousticophobia -- fear of noise
Acrophobia -- fear of heights
Aerophobia -- fear of flying
Agoraphobia -- fear of open spaces
Ailurophobia -- fear of cats
Algophobia -- fear of pain
Amaxophobia -- fear of riding in a vehicles
Androphobia -- fear of men
Anginophobia -- fear of sore throat
Anthropophobia -- fear of people, especially in groups
Apiphobia -- intense fear of bees
Arachnophobia -- fear of spiders
Astraphobia -- fear of lightning
Atelophobia -- fear of imperfection
Automysophobia -- fear or dislike of being dirty
Autophobia- Fear of being alone or of oneself
Bacteriophobia -- fear of bacteria
Bathophobia -- fear of bathing
Batophobia -- fear of passing high buildings
Batrachophobia -- fear of frogs and toads
Belonephobia -- fear of pins and needles
Blennophobia -- fear of slime
Bogyphobia -- dread of demons and goblins
Bromidrosiphobia -- fear of having unpleasant body odor
Brontophobia -- fear of thunder and thunderstorms
Carcinophobia -- fear of cancer
Cardiophobia -- fear of heart disease
Cenophobia -- fear of open spaces
Cheimaphobia -- fear or dislike of cold
Chrometophobia -- fear or dislike of money
Cibophobia -- fear of food
Claustrophobia -- fear of enclosed spaces
Cnidophobia -- insect stings
Coitophobia -- fear of sexual intercourse
Coprophobia -- fear of excrement/feces
Cyberphobia -- fear of computers
Cymophobia -- fear of waves
Cynophobia -- dread of dogs
Cypridophobia -- fear of venereal disease
Demonophobia -- fear of spirits, demons
Demophobia -- dislike of crowds
Dermatophobia -- fear of skin disease
Dipsophobia -- fear of drinking
Domatophobia -- fear of being in a house
Doraphobia -- fear of contact with animal fur or skin
Dysmorphophobia -- fear of deformity
Ecophobia -- fear of home surroundings
Eleutherophobia -- fear of freedom
Elurophobia -- fear of cats
Emetophobia -- fear of vomiting
Enetophobia -- fear of needles or pins
Entomophobia -- fear of insects
Ergophobia -- fear of work
Erotophobia -- fear of sexual feelings and their physical expression
Gamophobia -- fear or dislike of marriage
Gephyrophobia -- fear of crossing a bridge
Gerascophobia -- fear of growing old
Glossophobia -- fear of speaking in public or of trying to speak
Graphophobia -- dislike of writing
Gymnophobia -- fear of nudity
Gynophobia -- fear of women
Hadeophobia -- fear of hell
Hagiophobia -- dislike for saints and the holy
Hamartophobia -- fear of error or sin
Haptophobia -- fear of touch
Harpaxophobia -- fear of robbers
Hedonophobia -- fear of pleasure
Hemaphobia -- fear of the sight of blood
Herpetophobia -- fear of reptiles
Hierophobia -- fear or dislike of sacred objects, fear of priests
Hippophobia -- fear or horses
Hodophobia -- fear or dislike of travel
Homophobia -- fear of homosexuality (same-sex affection)
Hydrophobia -- fear of water
Hydrophophobia -- fear of rabies
Hygrophobia -- fear of liquids
Hypnophobia -- fear of sleep
Iatrophobia -- fear of doctors
Ichthyophobia -- fear of fish
Iophobia -- fear of poisons
Kakorrhaphiophobia -- fear of failure or defeat
Katagelophobia -- fear of ridicule
Keraunophobia-- fear of thunder and lightning
Kinetophobia -- fear or dislike of motion
Kleptophobia --fear of thievery
Kopophobia -- fear of mental or physical examination
Laliophobia -- fear of talking
Linonophobia -- fear of string
Mechanophobia -- fear of machinery
Merinthophobia -- fear of being bound
Microphobia -- fear of germs
Misanthropy -- a hatred of mankind in general
Misophobia -- fear of dirt
Molysomophobia -- fear of infection
Musophobia -- fear of mice
Myxophobia -- fear of slime
Necrophobia -- fear of death or corpses
Neophobia -- fear of new things
Noctiphobia -- fear of the night
Nosophobia -- fear of contracting a disease
Nudophobia -- fear of nudity
Nychtophobia-- fear of darkness
Obesophobia -- fear of gaining weight
Ochlophobia -- fear of crowds
Ochophobia -- fear of vehicles
Odontophobia -- fear of teeth
Odynophobia -- fear of pain
Ombrophobia -- fear of rain
Ophidiophobia -- fear of snakes
Panphobia -- a nonspecific fear of everything
Paraphobia -- fear of sexual perversion
Parasitophobia -- fear of parasites
Pathophobia -- fear of disease
Peccatiphobia -- fear of sinning
Pedophobia -- fear of children
Peladophobia -- dread of baldness
Peniaphobia -- fear of poverty
Phagophobia -- fear of eating
Pharmacophobia -- fear of drugs
Phasmophobia -- fear of ghosts
Phenogophobia -- fear of daylight
Phobophobia -- fear of fear itself
Phonophobia -- fear or dislike of noise
Photophobia -- fear of light
Phonemophobia -- fear of thinking
Pnigophobia-- fear of choking or smothering
Poinephobia -- fear of punishment
Psychophobia -- fear of the cold
Pyrexiophobia -- fear of fever
Rhabdophobia -- fear of being beaten
Rhypophobia -- fear of filth
Sciophobia -- fear of shadows
Scoleciphobia -- fear of worms
Scopophobia -- fear of being looked at
Scotophobia -- fear of the dark
Socialphobia -- fear of people or crowds
Tachophobia -- fear of speed
Taphephobia -- fear of being buried alive
Telephonophobia -- fear of the telephone
Theophobia -- fear of God
Thanatophobia -- fear of death
Tocophobia -- fear of childbirth
Tomophobia -- fear of surgical operations
Topophobia -- fear of certain places
Toxiphobia -- fear of being poisoned
Trichophobia -- fear of hair
Urophobia -- fear of urine
Vaccinophobia -- fear of vaccines and vaccination
Venereophobia -- fear of venereal disease
Venustraphobia -- fear of beautiful women
Verminophobia -- fear of germs
Vermiphobia -- fear of worms
Xenophobia -- fear of foreigners and strangers
Zoophobia -- fear of animals


AND I CHOOSE TO LET GO .......
I HAD ENOUGHT OF THIS.....

3.21

i don't know what happend but,
i believe that some things are meant too be,
and that you'll make a better me,
everyday i love you more and more.

i never thought that dreams come true,
but you showed me that they do.

i believe that destiny is out of control,
and i'll never live until you've loved,
with my heart and soul,

you and me
we're a miracle
meant to be and
nothing can change it
moutains move and oceans part
when they arestanding in our way
angels stand watching over us
while heaven shine upon us everyday

all my life i felt so incomplete
but you touched my sould
with your love so sweet...

there is a moutain and forest
i'm middle of the forest and
i'm in the moutain angles
send me a message said that
you be around me but i keep
walking until i believe that
dreams come true, and i met you
you melt my heart and my souls
after meeting you my faith change
i'm diffrent and i'm heading the
dirrection to you , you meants
somethings to me but you doens't
meants nothing to me.

i'm worry for the whole day
and i'm pranking with people
around me.

i'm too sensentive too this
but why don't you hit me a reply?
if we would end why don't you
tell me here or just call me
i'm waiting there.

The song were right
all my life were wrong
but sudelly things went right.
i really believe that.

Let me know what is going on
if we just can't slove this
less get back to the old days.
i will let it go as easy as i could.

Where did you go?

girl i'm siting right here and waiting for your msg.
where did you go?aren't me make you sad?
let me know my dear.

you seem not online , you block me?
sorry what i have done but please let me know where i did wrong.
if you just tell me i would think that much.

i miss you smile girl
i miss everything you said
i miss you in my hand
i miss everything that you mention
i miss the touch you touch me
i miss the tender love from you
i miss the sweet words that make me feel love
i miss your soul
i miss kiss
i just miss you

love is a four letter words don't you believe that?
why aren't you believing in me ...
i never cheat on you since you know me well
but it i did you probly know .

if i would know what happend
i will just tell you that i'm sorry
but if i'm not sorry about that,
arent you still angry about that?
it's week ago you still remember it?
hellow i'm fine here ,walking, talking here
still alive...
i'm not dead yet why do you avoid my msg and calls
did you saw my report? what does it said?
my times is up?you give up me just like that?
would you think i can probly heal?
have you think before?
i'm trying to hold on girl,
i'm struggle from it,
i'm starting to run back,
i'm doing what i can't do
i just do beacause i want you and i miss you

telling you i love you at this moment is not the right time
but if you saw this i hope you let me know what's going on.
i would never know what i did at the past and i'm not a sweet talker.
......

Seriouly missing you,
don't let go,
i probly still have hope.

samson

the day of joy

Joy of the talking for the whole morning siting at mcdonald drinking the tea there
from 9 oc till 2 oc i was talking for the whole time.

i hate people that talk like a king and do like a dog
they just freaking me out once again...
i have no freaking idea why do you said ok at the first time
and reject us at the last minute that is not freaking fair,
but things just happend have no idea what is that...
wounder what those people thinking.. they just think that is more fun.

insident happend there are no message until it shake me back..
just shake me .... and i reply... ops it's a question of helping
i wounder why and i answer it back... for what i geting was ignore.
don't just freaking do that to me i have feeling ....you think that is fun?
a joke? i really can stand a joke like that.

people just do thier joke in the wrong time,telling them to stop was
a worst case, even get more topic about that....

Ignore me ok i'm ok with anythings , since you said that you aren't
but you are. things would just change, just change
why would you avoid my question, if i would tell you in public
then i will but it's not , why do you hold back and keep pull me
things i only said once, how you see , how you do i don't care,
as long i tell you what i'm think about.You have the right to
accept or ignore . i just don't mind about that, things are
not going so well i guess , things will mess up again and again
who will get the pain of that, it's not me then it's you.
why would you like to let everyone know about that,
statment of what?a lie? a cheating message?
people just don't freaking care,he was right
better still i keep quite , let you have all the joy.
since i don't care about it , why would you care about me.
i'm at the other gallery , you are in the same old gallery.

don't get me you will learn and you will see
and days goes you will regret, you were just blind at
the moment... what you see is what you don't see.
never hope of this before because you never believe.
that make you soft and tender....

Air supply - without you

No, I can't forget this evening
Or your face as you were leaving
But I gues that's just the way the story goes
You always smile, but in your eyes
Your sorrow shows, yes, it shows

No, I can't forget tomorrow
When I think of all my sorrows
When I had you there, but then I let you go
And now it's only fair that I should let you know
What you should know

I can't live if living is without you
I can't give, I can't give anymore
I can't live if living is without you
I can't give, I can't give anymore

well i can't forget this evening
Or your face as you were leaving
But I gues that's just the way the story goes
You always smile, but in your eyes
Your sorrow shows, yes, it shows

I can't live if living is without you
I can't give, I can't give anymore
I can't live if living is without you
I can't give, I can't give anymore

can't live ohh i can't live(ohhhh.... no no no)
no can't live i can't live without you....
can't live anymore
can't live

Actuly life has manny missunderstood.

If you see my smile again,remember it!
good things doens't last long.

Which realationship were long enought?
there is no at the moment, as i see forever was not what i'm thinking
but how far can i go?there is a limit for me evendo i can it's too hard
it really hard for me to chase it , i'm at the early life now, who knows
what happends ,i said i'm maybe wrong but how manny wrong did i get?
finger are counter-able .

they just ask me something todays..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
sam what's comming up plans?

my plans? early plans or future plans?

sam tell me about it all .. would you mind?

my early plans was this sem i need to use it very nice
beacause my timetabble were very free.

like what ? what you want to do?

i'm looking forwards for contest to win some cash,and get training on my Illustrator and Photoshop.

arrrwww icic so how about your future plans?

mine? you sure you want to listen arr?

yes sam tell me...

my future plans was after this 3 years i heading outstattion for working maybe,or i just stay at here for working experience, but i still heading to outstattion for working.

arrrrwww that great plans... so how about your relationships?

you means all my girls friends?

yeah sam how about them?

i'm selfish , if they would just wait me , i still go on with it.

hei what makes you said that?

at this moment getting a girl was a plans killer ....

are you sure?

yes i'm sure then...

so not planning to get 1 girl?or you just like what you told me last time?

huh.. i change my dear...i'm gready but not at relationship anymore.

wao... i see something special in you . who change you ? she must be a lord to you .

for this it's a long story things i went to chruch and temple... i spend whole days there for nothing... that why i change but some of the people do change me as i see into my eye....

owhhh i want to know about the relationship of your when are you going to get one?

at my early 30's that was my best time.

Are you sure ? this doens't seem it's your plans

if that are not then why ask?if i would show you, you just said it's another fake face.

wow.. i din't said that ... but serious you change alot.wounder just wounder who could that be and so meanful to you.

matter or facts people change when they see through things.

you make me laught when you said 30's geting a girl, so how old would she be?

I guess she sure is younger then me, as you know what kind of attitude am i.

wow sound sexy and hot type...

neh i got it , i found out money are around those 2 words.

then ? who could that be?

haha maybe you X D ...

eh that so ain't true .

why ? beacause you read my other blog post you figure it out?

hei how the hell you know everythings and every move?

that is easy... as i told you if i want to know something, i just do some small traps and waiting people to step into it.

Why did you blog write that ? aren't me what you want?

hellow, that time i'm in problem and facing people ...sad thought.

ouch you din tell me.. am i too stupid to walk away?

ermm maybe if you would togather with me i would not change. who know's?

One last question before i leave , are you sure what you are doing are the correct things, do you really fall in love with me last time?

hei that was 2 question.. not fair haha i'm doing the rite things for my self now,and you ask me did i fall in love with you?

ya ya i just want to know that.

do you have time about 5 min?

yes.

ok then i tell you what i saw, i was missing you but , you are having another guy there if i would just jump into it. things would just change...and at that moment
i feel that you and me were playing a fool only , that why i give up this relationship.

owhh, means that middle was a wrong things happend?

huh it's?

Yes yes that was not what you think, you wrote that about the coffee shop things
that was not my boyfriends it was my X school mate...

really, things just change my dear pass is a pass don't worry.

should come over and ask me sam.

haha if i just ask that, today who's the one you calling?

ok i have to go now catch up you later...

arens't you walking away haha X D k ciao...


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
it's so weired she msg me X D happy thou.
she's cute ,but she's wild i can't take it.
X D

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm adjustable now ,
don't worry about me,
i have a plans,
i have change,
things are going fine,
just lack of cash,
and my health.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~